changed | Croncast - From Cool to Cul De Sac

gas station blues

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 21:27:12 -0500

fresh paint and nature slowly reclaiming this car haven't changed my memory of simpson's shell right behind our house on the alley.

Tags: simpson memory changed shell behind

sundown flowers #4

Sun, 04 May 2008 19:34:53 -0500

singing backup to the yellow was this blue player.

i mentioned in the other photo post about wondering how the digital camera changed the color of the purple flowers, well, in this shot it was true to life with the blue and yellow in this shot.

i wonder if it could be something in the flower itself and the way it reflects light?

Tags: blue yellow shot flowers life

Baby's Room Year 4

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 16:28:13 -0500

Maggie just turned 3 but we are heading into year 4 of this room with its horizontal stripes.

The design has maintained its contemporary style and aged with Maggie as she has gotten older, acquired more furniture and added more of her personality to the room.

Some of you might remember when we originally painted the room (photo www.croncast.com/images/lg_baby_room.jpg ) and how I claimed I would never paint horizontal stripes like this again. Well, after looking at the results I have changed my mind.

The look works and it makes it easy for the eye to understand where to look for framed objects. There are a few others around her room on in the white stripe.

Tags: baby room horizontal stripes paint stripes maggie

Season 19 Ep 21: John Adams, Hershey's Floor, Lock Picking Kit

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 08:30:15 -0500

Croncast - 2008-03-17.mp3
Show: #468
Length: 30:01
Size: 20.7mb
Format: mp3

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It's been a couple weeks
It's good to hear your voice baby
Stasis soon, I said
That was work
Thanks to Josh Bancroft for the message
Betsy was just attacked
It is no one else's fault but yours
You are to blame
I was watching a show about John Adams on HBO
Which is a sign your balls are reaching your knees
What were you watching?
Oprah's Big Give
I heard it is horrible
Yeah, it is pretty bad
Mom decided to go to bed
I thought I would pick up her old dog and carry it upstairs
I am talking about my empathy for this cold hearted bitch
I reach down to pick up the dog
And what do I get
That bitch attacked me with her one good tooth
She inserted it viciously into the palm of my hand
I got the hysterical laughs
Don't make me put the dog to sleep
She was laying on a piece of Zeus's bone
That is why she bit
I know
This is on page one of your baby book
Your mom tried to get your dad to do something he shouldn't
You love chaos in your life
Why else would I be married to you?
You look at a situation that appears to be calm
And you can find the chaos
How can you disagree with me?
I can't
That brings me to a story Mr. B
Jeanie is moving on up
Up where
Here you doofus
You neglected to notice that your children aren't in school
You have set precedence with this
Yeah, I have dropped him off twice with no school
Hello
So we take Elliot with us to go and look at rental homes
That is a good idea
Jeanie calls up a property management company
We have three houses lined up
Is that foreshadowing? Is that what they call it in the biz?
For $1100 a month what do you get?
The lemon yellow peeling paint house
It was made for a Model A
If you kick out the stick it all would have fell down
Couldn't tell where the house was
How could you not?
We saw it and the Psycho music played
Jeanie is polite
We went through with it
Why?
Maybe there is something fabulous here
Gluttons for punishment you are
I used to launch my He-Man action figure from the cloths line
Nifty, I feel robbed
If you only had one He-Man toy why did you treat him so bad?
They would have changed my name to Poindexter
You'll understand that when we open the side door
It was a smelly out of Cops house
The poor wife who was shackled to the bastard who owned
I am going to laugh because I am scared
Different paint in rooms
Different borders
This one looks like your mom put it up after a bottle of Smirnoff and Scope
The boards on the floor didn't even touch
No one sanded the floor they just painted it brown
It was a Hershey's floor with gaps
Slops of brown
At the next house he can't find the key
He busts out a lock picking kit
The place looks beautiful
But we see a ring around the walls
It had flooded and they never cleaned it up
I looked behind the wet bar
There were mushrooms growing out of the baseboards

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here! Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

Tags: He Man Jeanie lock picking kit rental house Oprah's Big Give

Season 19 Ep 15: KGB Training, Easy Women, The Long Haul

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 13:07:51 -0600

Croncast - 2008-02-11.mp3
Show: #461
Length: 33:28
Size: 22.9mb
Format: mp3

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Pick post any post
Tell me what kind of man I am
What kind of dirty man
What kind of wife walks around slovenly
You've fixed it
You look like Theo on The Cosby Show
The shirt is crazy
Right and I love it
My mom bought it from home shopping network
It is designed for a pin
It looks like a bank secretary
When these comments come in
Yeah, they come from new listeners
Do you remember the Lincoln?
Having to slide out of it shotgun style
It was always falling apart
Passing money out the door at McDonald's because window is broken
There was a lot of tension in the house early on
Years worth of tension
But the shows got better
Our lives got better
I am surprised anyone listened
I love you but my friend hates you guys
You gotta work with me people
We've gotten a lot better at telling stories
We like to deliver a good show
Hence, the word 'show'
I don't sparkle when I move
On that tip, we've been cranking out the Resale Queen
Catch up now
It's a show about topics
Not nothingness
Buy it used on eBay NIP
My improv show this week
This is your big shot
A career option
Some might call me gifted
I don't know who those people are
At a party with Betsy
She shares this all the time, "yes, I skipped a grade"
That is one of the first things people tell you
Technically what we are doing here is illegal
No money changed hands
Thank for easy women
I wouldn't have been married if it weren't for easy women
You wouldn't have been born if it weren't for easy women
There is a woman at the class who REALLY likes me
She tried to undress me during a scene
Does it make you feel good?
So we got Bar Louie and now this woman
What are you learning at improv?
First rule is to be supportive
Second is don't undress anybody
Maybe it is you
Are you sending the vibe?
No, no, no, no, noooooooo
She pulled my shirt up in front of a room of people
Audience was like ewww
Nobody wants to see my baby tummy
It looks like I was attacked by a bear
80 members?
That is not a home owner's association
I respectfully decline to go down this road
I battled with the Russian chick again
Shopping with the kids is like having a wild raccoon duct taped to your back
You get to see everyone's ankle bracelets
She took my plates
It's her KGB training
You crossed the line and should have never done it

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here! Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

View Kris's resume or download it

Tags: Homer Simpson Bar Louie Russian women Resale Queen wild raccoon

Pepsi Super Bowl Commercial Bob's House

Fri, 25 Jan 2008 12:42:22 -0600

Tim gets it right in his post "The Stuff Super Bowl Ads Are Made Of" when he says,

It truly has the stuff that Super Bowl Ads are Made of and looks like it will be one of the most talk about ad campaigns of this Super Bowl Season.

Wanna see it?

As Tim mentions in his post there is quite a back story here of how this commercial came about. It was originally produced by a few PepsiCo employees that are part of the EnAble group. Their version wasn't very Hollywood but very effective as a treatment or proof of concept because the story is told so well.

Look for some more buzz and talk in the next few weeks about this commercial as well as follow up videos.

How would I know? I mentioned on a podcast that I had a consulting gig that changed focus, right? Well, the team that is working this inside Pepsi and the digital team at a NYC agency are at the top of their game and will give this campaign legs beyond this one ad.

Tags: deaf sign language joke EnAble PepsiCo Super Bowl

Season 19 Ep 9: Casey's Bags, The Breakups, Groups of two

Fri, 25 Jan 2008 10:44:44 -0600

Croncast - 2008-01-25.mp3
Show: #455
Length: 26:05
Size: 18.0mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here!
Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

You know the comments have been light
You haven't been on Kris
People said they loved the mono story
But that shit was a total downer, Kris
You can't keep going parking with those ladies
I lived out every Bruce Springsteen song, ever
Small town birth control: Casey's bag
Some hostess snowballs and a bag
You date leans over and says thanks for the birth control
Who wants to buy condoms from their conservative cousins
She thinks you got long johns and condoms
We actually went out together
Sure I hadn't left in two weeks
It snowed a foot of snow and the road was open
Our driveway looks like a demolition derby
Still has your parked car on it
I had a dream about running for Treasurer in Naperville
We won't be selling the car
Betsy, right now
Small web job saved it for now
The big things are next
Things are turning around for you Mr B
We went to Silicon Prairie
I hate that name
I love it, Kris
It could be changed to Farm Hand Geeks
Or even Country Coders
The had Rock Band and that was fun
Sure, Dave Bost and Larry from Microsoft were there
They are Microsoft Evangelists
Why don't you have an xbox?
I don't spend money on games
Get a rhumba from Goodwill
They're charging more than eBay
It's even first generation
So you get on Rock Band
My first band broke up during the first song
You guys sucked
But then you moved to the lead singer
You nailed it
Do you have "Short, short man by 20 fingers?"
You have such a love for old school Chicago house
The same drum
Can I clue you in to rock
The same song for the last 30 years
It's like ick, Kris
House music is all about feeling good
Did your mom just happen to be on street corner in Davenport, IA?
It's not a boob without nipple
Yeah, it's all cleavage without it
Not really
Good, when I see you come on stage I hate you
Better, to know that you hate yourself too
Now lets have some fun
New curriculum for ever class
That is not the school you want to go to
Betsy, you are too dirty
Yeah, news flash
I have all these shows for you to point out what's wrong with me
My checklist is all filled in
Tomorrow: Resale Queen Podcast by 9 a.m. CST
Topic: What you need in your resale kit
Shout out to Yoosun Lee in NYC

View Kris's resume or download it

Tags: Rock Band Silicon Prairie Dave Bost Microsoft Evangelist Davenport

New photo feed

Thu, 29 Nov 2007 15:50:30 -0600

Well, it really is an old feed that I used for another project but thought I could spice it up a bit. It's a photo feed from flickr but I've rewritten it load the middle size image as opposed to the thumbnail and changed the enclosure from the middle size photo to the large size for a hefty payload.

Said feed - http://www.croncast.com/flickr.rss

The posts in this feed are only the title and photo, no description text at all.

Example photo size in feed

Example of original photo size in enclosure - You'll have to click this to see it.

Tags: flickr feed thumbnail size original size croncast photos

Making use of my Google Reader shared feed

Tue, 28 Aug 2007 15:37:04 -0500

The 'kris is reading' section of the site is now fully functional. Go and check it out. I'll be here when you get back.

Glad to have you back.

So what the hell was that, right?

I have finished up, for now (some touching up to do), what I think is a pretty cool way to use a shared Google Reader feed. I think I stumbled upon an interesting concept that enhances sharing information online and makes it more personable.

The history of how I got to this point is at the end of this post. I'm going to try to describe what you just saw the best way I can. Here goes nothing:

1. I parse my Google Reader shared feed and cache it in a database. This is done with a script that runs on a cron every two minutes to get new items - post title, description and timestamp
2. I stamp the item with the current time that I most likely read the item
3. This is cool - I run a script to generate keywords (subjects) from the shared item. The script needs to mature a bit but it is pretty effective.
4. I then pull the cached posts up in to the 'kris is reading' section of the site and order them by the time that I read them. Really the only way to organize them coherently since the post timestamps vary based on the author's time zone
5. I display the keywords below each post. Each keyword is a link that will search all of my other shared items for related posts. Each keyword has a link to technorati. Each keyword is an entry into RSS feed for that keyword subject.
6. I have added a 'Search my read items' function so that you can search my shared items for whatever you like. If you want to find items that I have read about about ceratin topic like, Facebook, you can.

What's happening is that I am giving you, the reader of my shared feed the ability to use me as a content filter. And the best part is that you didn't have to ask me to read up on a given topic that you are interested in. I didn't have to add it to a to-do list, I was already doing it. And now I'm able to give you access to it in a few ways:

1. Here's everything that I have read and shared from Google Reader
2. Here's everything that I have read - now search it by subject
3. Here's everything that I have read - now subscribe via RSS to a subject (keyword) and get updates every time I read an item about your subject without ever having to come back to my site

The other really cool part is that the source publishers benefit from my sharing adding the drill down with search, keywords and keyword feeds.

In this scenario I have become a 'social filter', so to speak. Then my readers get to step up to the plate and filter even further. A 'hyper-social filter', so to speak. I am able to share an item from a publisher that my current readers might have never found. Possibly (and possibly in the same sense that someone might find your content in search engine or directory) my readers will visit the publisher's site and subscribe to the source feed.

In a strange way it gives an individual like myself the chance to create a low threshold directory with the ability to be distributed simply by marking items that I like. It takes Google Reader to a new place beyond a feed reader and makes it a platform for syndication. Google Reader becomes a powerful tool to create new channels of distribution for content that usually meets its end on a subscribers computer. Now it has legs.

How can I see other people using this? Tons of ways.

1. The same way that I am using it to create a history of my own reading with the ability to share right down to the topic level.
2. By individuals respected as gate keepers like librarians. Example - whether the source feeds were running on their library content or the internet they could mark items from those feeds and then give the feed based on a topic to a patron, i.e. happy computer savvy student who doesn't need to come back and ask for help again.
3. Could be used to share information behind a firewall from corporate blogs. Great way to fatten up a corporate knowledge base by picking and choosing from your qualified authors.
4. You could create micro-repositories based on topics
5. A million other ways that I haven't thought of yet. Not even quite sure I could come up with a million.

How I got here:

A few months ago, before Rick split to California, the full Naperville nerd posse was together one last time. I was busting out a story about how I was parsing out my Google Reader shared feed and displaying it for site visitors on my 'kris is reading' page. I was way stoked about it. But like many times in the past, it came to light that Rick and beaten me to this with the 'links' section of his blog. He was taking his shared feed, burning it and displaying it on its own page and in his blog navigation. Brilliant!

My consolation, instead of being first (important in nerd circles), was that I had learned how to do this with my own code . . . a valuable prize I am finding out.

So about a month ago I changed up the code to cache my shared feed items. Which was good for two reasons:

1. I could display more than the 25 items in the feed
2. I would have a historical record of what I was reading in my own blog.

And, again, I was not first again. Damn it! This step was inspired by the Tumblr link blog of Josh Bancroft. Seeing the posts cached and the ability to navigate them 20 or so items at a time was brilliant. I could see a ton of stuff that Josh was reading but also see what was motivating him enough to write posts from.

Should I know better than to try be first in doing something? Yes, but my nerd side does get the best of me sometimes.

I doubt that I am first in working over a shared feed this way but it was fun to build and I am sure it will be useful in making something else. Hell, maybe it will inspire someone else to do something cool.

Tags: Google Reader shared feed kris is reading Josh Bancroft link blogs

twitter seems to have changed feeds - via twitter

Sun, 19 Aug 2007 09:23:29 -0500

just noticed in a post from a tumblr blog that twitter added some elements to their feeds.

Tags: twitter cron

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 29, 2007

Fri, 29 Jun 2007 08:11:04 -0500

Croncast - 2007-06-29.mp3
Show: #380
Length: 27:03
Size: 18.5mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 29, 2007

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Back from vacation
The show quality has changed a bit with new replacement gear
I will miss you UA 6176's but welcome the new dbx 1066 as an able stepchild
The dbx 1066 just doesn't have the same punch or open sound
Betsy is making up words "non-dramicle"
Definition - normal
Vacation with kids is racing to bed time for the adult vacation
It's a great time with the kids but for relaxation they need to be sleeping
Souvenirs gets Betsy going
No, you can't buy Maggie a rabbit pelt
Sure, 30 feet of rabbit pelts means 300 ft of sausage

Did I ever tell you what my dad brought back from a Florida vacation?
I bought you this really nice present
My sister gets a doll toy
I get a dead shark in a bottle
Yes, you have talked about your purely irrational fear of sharks
Shark week is just hell for me
I don't even watch television
It's so irrational
Have you ever had an encounter with a shark?
It's some sort of fetal shark in jar
It still had the soulless glare
That shit doesn't pass with death
I was afraid of death of the thing
I left it on the deck in the middle of winter
After about 3 weeks my mom saw it on the back porch
It had exploded, epitome of my mom's memories of my father
Then I had to go and clean it up
This is why I am a messed up person Kris
If it wasn't for my parents I wouldn't be so messed up
Ahhh, vacation was good
Doping up the kids with souvenirs to placate them
The "me" time on vacation . . . Indian gaming casino - Ho Chunk
Man, slots have changed in the years since we've been there
No more tokens or quarters for them
Digital machines with receipts that have bar codes
Tracking your slot usage
Betsy signs up with the frequent gambler program
I know you get a lot of class acts in here
You guys are making this too hard to spend my money
So I get you to come
The slots are now just computers
When you get tired of it robbing you blind
You take your receipt
A document of the heist that has just happened
Or a document that measures your joy in dollars
The great Wheel of Fortune penny slot machine story
Kris walked out with some loot in a way that only Kris could score it
Karma hooked me up
The all inclusive takes its toll when it comes to buffets
All the crab that we ate
The breakfasts and deserts
The breakfasts with deserts
The whole joint was staffed by Moldavians
They make some powerful drinks
Who knew that the Wisconsin Dells was powered by a foreign workforce?
Well, Chula Vista is

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Tags: Wisconsin Dells Chula Vista Ho Chunk casino vacation 2007 shark in a jar

Betsy and her husband Kris May 25, 2007

Fri, 25 May 2007 07:32:16 -0500

Croncast - 2007-05-25.mp3
Show: #367
Length: 34:11
Size: 23.4mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris May 25, 2007

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Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

Bringing the intro
I got it this time . . . the original intro with emails
If my eyes were balls of lava your head would be melting
I noticed you've not called your parents
Listen, I got to call them from my cell
Yeah, the swing set needs to be moved on Sunday now
So you might not be able to make it out to your folks
And on Saturday Calvary Church in Naperville is having it's annual sale
I'll be there at 6:30 in the morning
Times are desperate Mr B . . . I gotta tear it up
I might just pretend that I am one of them for a discount
What are you doing here this early?
Are you a member?
Betsy calls the employees "scaries"
My sister witnessed someone trying to haggle . . . "You know Jesus is watching you."
What? Jesus wants your mega church to have 50 more cents?
So what is it you people on the circuit call the workers?
The church is one of those that preaches the prosperity crap and monetary wealth for your faith
I know how these crews work baby
You never know how Betsy is going to react
Yeah, I'm way far on the left and way far on the right
Sometimes I like to just watch people squirm
I'm sorry you have difficulty with me Mr B
I play the opossum role
Where'd you get that quarter?
I just have sucker written all over me
Reminiscing about Betsy's special wheel chair from last year
It got deep and deeper on her
It wasn't Jesus watching it was some super bad Unitarian karma
She started frontin'
What kind of asshole devil buys a wheelchair from Christians and then tries to sell it for profit the next day on eBay?
You?
The buyer ended up needing a part for the chair
But baby, would she have gotten the chair without you!
Do you know how much Karma owes me for marrying you, Mr B?
My key this year is to hang back and find the least scary of the scaries
They can have my soul
The big ball jar waiting at the end to capture your soul
Karma vs. Jesus . . . I'm a Unitarian we walk with Karma
I just want to talk about this
You wake up and tell me that if I ever cheat on you will kill me
"You cheated on me in my dreams"
When I cheat on you in a dream I pay for it for three days!
WTF baby
It wasn't sex with a random hussy
She manipulated you from across the room
So I didn't have to go home for lunch
He is mine!
I laid my claim early!
I looked upon the sea of men and said which one of you is strong with a weak constitution
Someone that doesn't make sense like I don't make sense
The goat story is classic
Yeah I get it but there is a time and place for that story
They have a greater appreciation
What it was like going to doctor and they make small talk and then you tell them you work for the other side
Everything changed
It was a job of respect . . . never had one of those before
Burning cars in Naperville

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Tags: Calvary Church in Naperville Croncast Cronies Jesus is watching you dream cheating vehicle fires

Betsy and her husband Kris May 23, 2007

Wed, 23 May 2007 07:57:18 -0500

Croncast - 2007-05-23.mp3
Show: #366
Length: 34:37
Size: 23.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris May 23, 2007

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Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

Kris tries to take it back to 2004 and fails
The old school intro
Things have changed for the better since we've been doing the show
Someone actually sent an email with that in it today . . . being able to hear the difference
You've never had respect for me Betsy
It will only grow when I see the gravel pit that you crawled out of
You're worried about what Elliot will say about the dead cars in the yard
Someone lives in that house?
Yes, that's where I grew up
The house is the size of our finished basement
Kris, it was the size of a double wide
My little house used to be a warehouse
The great La Moille fire and our house survived
As the story goes . . . it was started by a train derailment in the late 1800's
The trailer office next to the tallest building in town, the grade school
You could see Chicago 120 miles away on a clear day
Kris you were looking at West Aurora
Civil war reenactment town historian nut
Did he do the glove thing?
Was it a scarred nub beneath?
No, I don't think he was the engineer of the train
I grew up around some scary characters
Good thing they had him work at the school so people could keep an eye on him
It was like a pig roast with my extended family . . . Keystone Light and firearms
You were packing heat on family outings, Kris?
No the extended family
So it was like Civil War done better with upgraded military hardware
Betsy tells another great vet story
I am beginning to think that vet offices are great place for material
Is it possible for a my cat to fall in love with my dog?
The cattle call vet . . . it isn't a prestigious appointment
The cat is binge eating because it is depressed
"Why are his lips so ugly?" mother-in-law asks about the cat
Turns out that little deaf dog has a blazing ear infection
"How to do you tell if your dog is deaf?"
The arthritis medicine, cholesterol medicine and diabetes diet weren't working that day
Deaf dog now has some pep in her step
Betsy . . . I didn't know raisins weren't candy until I was 7
So what happened to you, Betsy?
God, this girl had Lik A Maid . . . cool aid on sugar stick
I said to myself when I am an adult I am going to buy a candy bar every day
Red Bull + Lik A Maid = Garage sale power drink

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Tags: Lik A Maid Keystone Light cat dog lovin Garage sale power drink tallest building in town