chicks | Croncast - Life is Show Prep

Season 21 Ep 17: Fly home stoned, Polyester rugs, Gesticulate freely

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 12:37:27 -0600

Croncast - 2009-02-27.mp3
Show: #517
Length: 27:26
Size: 25.2 mb
Format: mp3

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Get it on
Leave us some comments here or reviews in iTunes
Not really vicious
But spousal hate
Funny on many levels
A paid gig for Betsy
Will you be on IMDB?
I don't know what you're talking about
March every Thursday
Five other chicks all under me
Sounds like my kind of life
It's all coming together
Adam Carolla is now on the podcasting
Maybe we need to hire him
Six women under me
I want to write that book
Re-organized the basement
I had to get it on
Needed to change up my space
This winter is killing me emotionally
Short shorn polyester rug
It's 85 colors and shades of testosterone
Been stuck down here working for so long
I got a bit claustrophobic
Proud you cleaned up
Making space
I was afraid to touch your desk
Now I can gesticulate freely
It's like we're single again
Right from your mother's clutches to mine
You would be perfectly happy at public storage
Don't ship Grandma's meds via FedEx
So she can fly home stoned
Right, like God intended
Sherlock in Mumbai

Tags: Adam Carolla Podcast FedEx mule gesticulate freely Sherlock in Mumbai

museum of science and industry chicago

Sun, 16 Mar 2008 11:30:35 -0500

just arrived at msichicago.org with the kids.

was told they are filimg with the chicks today.

Tags: kids told filimg chicks msichicago

Season 19 Ep 10: Rough Stop, Danger Here, Mongoose Chow

Mon, 28 Jan 2008 11:03:20 -0600

Croncast - 2008-01-28.mp3
Show: #456
Length: 25:57
Size: 17.9mb
Format: mp3

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The Resale Queen Podcast is now here!
Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

Really short show notes today

Old school send email intro piece
You can stare to long at a boa constrictor
Feeding mongoose baby ducks
Yes, we shouldn't have entered the bathroom
A huge chunk of snow hit him on the head
Maggie stopped her fall with her face
No I didn't say take her to the emergency room
Yes you did, like 10 times
You'll do anything for a trip to the emergency room
You grew up in there

View Kris's resume or download it

Tags: mongoose Lincoln Park Zoo baby chicks caution tape hep c

Chickens in them eggs

Sun, 13 Jan 2008 16:23:24 -0600

Today was daddy day and it all worked out perfectly thanks to the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago - free admission.

It's been about a year since I took the kids and thought that Maggie might really enjoy it now that she is older.

When I told them where we were going the first thing she said was, "baby chickens". It's amazing what they remember. The last time she was there she was a year and a half old.

Why can't I remember stuff like that?

Tags: egg incubator MSI Chicago Museum of Science and Industry chicks

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 03, 2007

Wed, 03 Oct 2007 08:20:47 -0500

Croncast - 2007-10-03.mp3
Show: #417
Length: 31:01
Size: 21.3mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 03, 2007

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Bringing you the show for October 3rd
Be sly that that Google search person
It was good
New contest . . . Google you most creative result that gets you Croncast
You have to click through
You will win some stickers
The stickers were in your expo bag
Those gotta go out
Thanks to Steve, Mark, Rhonda and Craig
Betsy giving me looks as I slow down those names
They were at the live show
Betsy has some thoughts on the nerd convention
Every woman should visit one of these
There were no chicks there
1. No line for womens bathroom
You should be happy not to have many women while husband is away
Doing shots at the bar with Nick Starr
You are the hottest chick in the bar
Never happens to me in Naperville
It's an ego boost
It is so easy to compliment you people
You say something kind of clever . . .
Then I say, "I'm gonna twitter that"
Or say, "I am going to buy that domain"
Yeah, I used that a few times
Ahh, nerdom. I love it
Why don't we go to In and Out Burger again
Too much to handle
My lower colon just smiled at you
Twitter is addictive
It's like IM but one way
Do they build sonar into your phones?
You live in the dark
Come out into the light and you walk reading your device
Nobody has a iPhone hit the floor baby
It's not just guys
You have a vagina. You are supposed to be on my side
You are being so impolite, bears
I don't want to look like a nerd
No one calls each other at a nerd event
It's all sms baby, ping
Or we communicate by twitter
Swatting at invisible spiders
They are not nerd vacations . . . it's where business gets done
Everyone talks about what they have going on
Like Aaron Brazell mentioning mem_cache on MySQL
If I hadn't been on that trip I wouldn't have been able to share that with our developers
There were no babies or many wedding rings
I volunteered for something that I will pass to you, Kris
I have to decline
I do not want to volunteer for art class
It's no big deal Mr B
The children are making these collages
This is the most beautiful forest that I have ever seen
That's not your tree . . . that's your mother . . . oh!
Now I got to make a pipe cleaner cloud
It's all about balance
This flower . . . I can almost . . . smell it
Maybe a pipe cleaner porcupine?
It is the coolest funniest shit you've ever seen
We need rounded edges Mrs. Smith
Little boys making the "gun" hand on the playground
Fighting back instead of being pushed around
Being positive for the man
He has picked up a new habit that he is sticking with
Going full circle
Yes, my mom called 12 times today and left three voicemails
Would a neurologist have anything to look for in your ear?

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Tags: iPhone twitter that nerdom Aaron Brazell nerd conferences

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 15, 2007

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 11:33:00 -0500

Croncast - 2007-08-15.mp3
Show: #397
Length: 29:34
Size: 20.3mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 15, 2007

photo on left by dave winer and photo on right by josh hallet thanks to both!

Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

The nerd things that drive me crazy
Betsy is going to find me a online geek mistress
That would be sweet
You go ahead and marry that girl Mr. B
After days of this haven't you had enough?
Apologies for no show on Monday
I blew it on Sunday and had to take the red eye
No one wants to hear your drama
If it were done on graph paper it would have all been good
I didn't hear any of this "life would be better on paper" at Gnomedex
Here's what made it so cool
I had my nerds on one hand and my baby on the other
It was our 11th wedding anniversary
Yeah, and you take me to a nerd convention
Your nerd buddies are cooler and much more high functioning than I thought
Apologies to me for the ewok comment
A dude was dressed as a pirate
It was just one guy
The 12 sided dice and hoods were missing
The 11th wedding anniversary is as special as turning 36
Up to 10 you are swimming upstream . . . after that . . . floating in a tube
Seattle is a great place
You didn't plan our dinner Mr. B
Yes I did . . . reservations are a plan!
That is a large step
The restaurant turned out to be really nice
There was an attentive gay waiter
Can you hire one of those for me here at home
The beautiful view
Then a 3 story tall lighted Cadillac Escalade barge floated by
Nice view
The other awesome part was that you got to meet some listeners
Mark is an awesome guy
I know I told you that
Yeah, but you are usually wrong
At the party I saw the nerds trying to sink into their ringer tees
You have blossomed like a $10 orchid
Having social skills, Mr. B you have grown
Betsy got to see me in my element
I still don't get your people
Let's take Kosso for instance?
You can't pick Kosso he is normal
What about the guy dressed as a pirate Mr B?
The dudes that split a suit
The pic on right above is from the Thursday night out
Strange woman talking to us, looks at floor and walks away
The nerd wife put one shiny shoe right in front of him
My Nerd!
This nerd off limits
She busts out, "Well, I dress him!"
Not in a ha ha way
I don't understand your "Party Only" badge
She scared me
Those chicks look alright . . . "The Women of WarCraft"
God Damn
I'm not in to that type of stuff
These chicks were hot on a nerd level scale
We're going to score some mad nerd ass tonight
My people were talking to you because you were a personable lady
You've got nerd engagement skills
You've got to pretend your eyes are lasers
Yep, right here buddy
Asking a nerd what they do is not the right thing to ask
It is always difficult to explain
You asked me what the hell do you do?
Then tell them my title . . . right, what does that mean
The guy on the way home asked me, what do you do?
What was your reply Betsy?
I do nothing. I buy and sell shit.
So your husband is a nerd? Are you a nerd?
No
Do you podcast?
Yes
How many times a week?
3
You're not a nerd?
Do you sell your stuff online?
Yes
You're not a nerd?
Do you watch Heroes?
Yes
Watch John From Cincinnati?
Yes
You're not a nerd?
When buying swag for nerd events don't buy them white shirts
The other great part for me was first alcoholic beverage in 10 years
I had to announce it because you called me the teetotaling nerd husband
Not he hardcore found Jesus type of not drinking
That's not it Betsy
My first drink was Jagermeister with Aaron Brazell
I broke the seal and enjoyed the libations
Had an awesome time on Saturday night with Mark, Greg, Aaron, Kosso, Steve, Josh, Dave C., Mike, Chris, Michael and Dave D.
Not having to be on, Betsy's specialty
Betsy does her first improv class
Pretend you are a tree
Were you there?
My theater background is you know . . .
Yeah, lying under a theater major once doesn't count
My neighbor is in this class
Leave us some comments
Great American Yard Sale is this weekend
Thanks to Bernadette for this review and write up!

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Tags: Gnomedex 2007 Seattle Great American Yard Sale improv class The Women of WarCraft Jagermeister

Kind of cool

Wed, 13 Jun 2007 12:55:31 -0500

Not my usual fare for a blog post but something interesting about a dead whale and the tale it is telling.

Evidently, long ago, this whale was shot with an exploding spear head and lived with it embedded in its body for possibly 100 years.

The part that caught my attention was this:

"He couldn't have been that bothered if he lived for another 100 years." - John Bockstoce, adjunct curator of the New Bedford Whaling Museum

Oh, really. I have heard from a reliable source close to the whale in question, that he often regretted not having the spear tip removed though it did give him a killer scar that all the chicks dug.

Tags: John Bockstoce whale spear tip 100 old whale cool scar exploding spear tip

Pitch Mark Cuban your idea for an HDNet show

Mon, 14 May 2007 15:09:50 -0500

Mark Cuban has a post up today asking for new show pitches for his television network HDNet.

Now is the time to get someone on that "Biker Chicks from Mars" serial you've been thinking about.

Tags: Mark Cuban HDNet pitch your show Biker Chicks from Mars

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Feb 2007 07:59:21 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-12.mp3

Show: #336
Length: 34:28
Size: 23.6mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 12, 2007

This show was brought to you by Roger Palek (Kris says, "Richard" sorry Roger)
It's been a while
When I was in Boulder I only recorded one side of the show, mine
The best fan representation of our show
How about dress up as a puffy cuffs and send up your polaroid
Mr. B you are so forgetful . . .we need of list of people who donated
I'm on it
This show was brought to you by Roger Palek (Kris says, "Richard")
Not quite on it
Gone all last week and I'll be gone this week too
Betsy, "Do you know what I learned to do this week? Live without you."
It was nice and quiet without you around
Four days later I was missing you
You want me to want you 20 minutes after you walk out the door
I'll be gone over Valentine's day
Picking up the ring that already is paid for
Booba, give me your run down for the week
Betsy's bad eBay week
Goodwill Kodak slide trays makes it not so bad
Magazine "Good" with Marc Jacobs
Social Activism and Culture Jamming
Sounds like those are people who shower . . . not your people
There were no slides in the trays
"Fall over the lake"
"West side of the cabin"
This was some boring as shit man
Goodwill has been bad . . . it has been so cold
What was awesome about it was that I left
When I landed in Boulder it 54 degrees
I could tan in that weather I'm so white
54 degrees and sunny could cause me to blister
I'm surprised that you didn't come home in patchwork pants
Didn't you have homeless friends in college?
NO
My roommate used to pick up guys off IRC circa 1993
Laying in the bunk bed drunk and stoned
This strange mans leans over me and says, "Think she's want to join us."
Madrigals all the time
She was a whore monger
Those chicks scare me
How Kris became afraid of dentists
I could lord over him with my OK teeth
You never smiled until
I didn't know what a habit was
That's why my teeth are rotting out
He was the pamphlet reader
Free clinic will give you a drug you've never tried pamphlet
Well it's time Mr B to get your teeth fixed
Tongue depressors to fix teeth
She ended up with braces anyway

Tags: Roger Palek Good Magazine madrigals culture jamming Boulder, CO homeless friends

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 05, 2007

Mon, 05 Feb 2007 07:28:52 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-05.mp3

Show: #335
Length: 31:09
Size: 21.4mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 05, 2007

Read the iTunes comments for me
Who couldn't use an ego boost before ni-ni's
I learned this about Betsy
What is their format called?
But you know all the songs . . . when the hell do you listen?
Betsy knows all the words and Maggie groovin
The tunes were inappropriate for the kids
Add that to the Super Bowl commercials
That commercial brought out more awkward silence nation wide than anyone else
People will just have awkward silence with Snickers bars from now on
The Doritos commercial?
Oooooh spicy
I wish I could drown myself in the salsa verde
Another awkward pause between mothers and children
Elliot asks what happened? Bed time happened. That's what happened
The innuendo and violence
Go Daddy commercials
The naked chicks at the podcast party didn't work on you Kris
Joining forces to work in your underwear
I do have the camera up here
I been doing that Jetsons thing
You're not down here making cheese
Actually I am
We could sell the floor sweepings to Kraft
Wearing man Jammies on my trip this week
I'll be in Boulder for the rest of the week working
Betsy toying with idea of renting a house in Boulder for the summer
Rent, plus mortgage
I watch too much Oprah not steal money from you
Instead of spending it she's putting it away
Saving money is Betsy's new addiction
Who are you to speak?
Around tax time, when I think about the money that went through my fingers
Nickelodeon hell on earth hotel
Any listeners been there? Let us know what it is like.
I've seen pictures of Disney and they are creepy
Happy people who have been thoroughly checked to walk around in cute costumes
I got county fair instead
Is there a place with carnies all year 'round
I can press charges or you can work at Dollywood
An entire venue dedicated to roach clip collections
It is cold in Chicago
Hear that? Hear that? . . . all we say in Betsy's car now
Yes it is back . . . no doubt that they pulled it apart
The Slowsky tale of woe
Bad car karma
You have your own show
I have done it right this year with attorney help
Looking for a Volvo replacement
Take the puff out of your cuff Mr. Bears
I've gotten used to the heated seats

Tags: Slowsky tale of woe Bad car karma Doritos Super Bowl commercial Boulder trip iTunes comments

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 02, 2007

Fri, 02 Feb 2007 07:27:59 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-02.mp3

Show: #334
Length: 34:16
Size: 23.5mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 02, 2007

Nick T rating of 4

Nick T rating system:
Scale: 1 = Safe for everyone
Scale: 2 = Some parental guidance
Scale: 3 = Maybe this is for 12+
Scale: 4 = Not legal? Probably not for you - Adult themes (like HBO series)
Scale: 5 = Only safe for Betsy's dad

The jokey who left the 300th comment on the Wii Friend Code post
1 (900) Wii-Code
Getting them on the line to chat about their code
Anybody here? Anybody here? Anybody here?
I'm here . . . Now refresh
Betsy shook me down for old equipment to sell on eBay
She sold my brown Zune to some sorry soul
Yeah, I thought it sucked
Next to the Netgear SPH101 Skype phone it was the worst
iTunes is so far ahead of where Microsoft wants to be
The store is a science . . . MS doesn't have a chance starting so far behind
Urge? Yeah, urge to puke . . . urge to bodily
She also sold my DBX compressor/limiter/gate thing
Sold to the Columbus Arts Council
Betsy, "I have a new business idea."
Rows of monitors like head stones staring at you
Maybe they need parts
If I can sell it, it doesn't matter if it was free to me
"Free to Me" to be Betsy's autobiography title
Haven't you said about 100 times that you are going to do that
Land of Nod trip for the purse business
Is this a purse business anymore?
It's back to any hustle that you can get?
Yes, you're right Bears
Manipulating the Land of Nod staff with crying babies
The best day is to go the first day of the month for mark downs
Why it is no longer a purse business
What people expect in our basement . . . it is underwhelming
The Wii article ran in Reuters and then got picked up in many places
Betsy reads the article
"If you have ever picked you nose or punched someone . . . "
I am so embarrassed
What a 32 year old tool
Bernadette says, "Have you thought of horses?"
We know how that would go
Needle in the balls and bullet in the head
Betsy says they still cap them
Dramatic ending needed for champions
Maybe back in 1930 they shot them
FFA, the sheep and the shotgun . . . tell it Betsy
The big dollar sheep showing check
You were chasing the wrong poontang in high school, Kris
Those beefy farm chicks had mad cash

Tags: brown Zune FFA sheep Netgear SPH101 Columbus Arts Council Free to Me

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 06, 2006

Fri, 06 Oct 2006 07:07:04 -0500

Croncast - 2006-10-06.mp3

Show: #281
Length: 31:00
Size: 21.3 mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris October 06, 2006

The emails cam flying in yesterday for the painted chicks
Well, it is your eyes . . . check out one here
It's a frontal and Betsy feels sorry for this woman
Why didn't you go to Denny's instead?
Pale pudding faces and thnking what a sexless group
The post I mention is referenced above
Street-walker shows on HBO
Kris can stop watching . . . Betsy can't
She is a fan of the train wreck
How much can I pay you to get dressed right now?
Kris wants to rehash his Expo excitement
We're both going next year
Betsy SMS messaging turns me on . . nerd love
Basking in the stardom of Betsy
My phone just called Betsy randomly at Expo
She was surprised that I was speaking
Listening through my pants
Nerd brethren I can talk it up
Again with the name drops from dinner
Big shout out to Rick, Rick Klau
Betsy says I can tell a story
No Betsy crutch
Betsy sets her self up to tell her story
3 children heavy at Goodwill
Betsy's apprentice pulls one over on her
Elliot fell once he never stood back up again
Here's the bag on eBay
Betsy flirts with Tubby the Love Bucket for a shot

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2) Verify your email address (Activates and qualifies those with a "Handle")
3) *New* listeners get activated and qualified by using their special RSS feed
4) 300th new listener and the person whose Handle they use win iPods AND
5) A drawing for 2 more iPods from everyone who entered!

Tags: HBO Goodwill painted chicks PME SMS

Ask and ye shall receive painted chicks

Thu, 05 Oct 2006 09:29:11 -0500

Emails, comments and one phone call bring you some of the naked painted chicks.

Remember these naked gals are people too so be kind.

This one is a little too racy for me to post here.

Yes . . . I get it . . . the human form is beautiful and the problem is my own hang ups. See for yourself.

These photos come courtesy of Flickr streams belonging to crapmonkey and podcheck.

Tags: painted chicks ontario, ca expo party i am so embarrassed

Betsy and her husband Kris Apr. 19, 2006

Wed, 19 Apr 2006 06:48:39 -0500

Croncast - 2006-04-19.mp3

Show: #217
Length: 42:19
Size: 29.0 mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Apr. 19, 2006

Listen with iTunes? Leave us a comment - spread the word!

Show Notes

Changing all of Betsy's intro's to "I'm the decider."
Kris now owns imthedecider.com
I own 50 domains
Betsy wants to spend that money on a lawnmower
Geroge Bush said it - the I'm the decider
"I hear the voices"
Combating Bill Maher
Talking to America like children
Presidential speak should be colloquial
He just wants me to open the Igloo and pass him one
Unscripted speeches
She gets shot in the face all the time
Reality show we missed in our list - Deadliest Catch on A&E
The USDA is in charge
Betsy says the water is -60 F - what?
You're hoping deep down inside to see an accident
Kris is a keeper
The crabs arms are torn off - "what just happened? what just happened?"
Flip This House again
Betsy lands the sooners analogy
Betsy's first social worker job
Once your kids poop on you 50 times they look less cute
The car breaks down when Kris was out of town . . . 10 years ago
Betsy starts throwing them back at 7 a.m.
We didn't spend that much time together
Kris was a basket case
No more cheap wagoneers and social work
The chicks are on the prowl - lol
Make it a magic 8 ball kind of thing
How to get on the Daily Show
Betsy and I should do the show live on stage
Reporters said fake it and we cracked them up and they thanked us
The Mrs. Coach story
Strip mall comedy clubs
Live to Hard Drive
Setting it up like a radio live event is not cool
I could do this
Hanging out with Betsy and Elliot
Tell Kris that your 5 year old is crazy too
Consolidated school districts
Thanks to Scott Burnett

Tags: I'm the decider Deadliest Catch colloquial Jeep Wagoneer Consolidated

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris 135

Fri, 14 Oct 2005 06:01:40 -0500

Croncast - 2005-10-14.mp3

Show: #176
Length: 32:29
Size: 22.3 mb
Format: mp3

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris 135

Give us a review at Yahoo!

Show Notes

Betsy wants to garage sale all night long
Bad garage sale karma
Documentary of Betsy's addiction
More than $6 for apparel? Not this house
Don't ask don't tell garage sale policy - smoking
Toddler treadmills
Cartoons for reward
Tiny folks
FedEx Kinkos vs. Pizza Hut
Garage saling cut short
Tenements of the highly mobile $600,000 middle management homes
Raining toilet water on our stuff
Curbside wardrobe boxes
Screaming baby and garbage picking makes Betsy uncomfortable
Give her some of our table scraps
Kris will go back to Kinkos
Now Betsy's wrist is acting up, all the cul de sacs
Lloyd's of London for Betsy's eBay wrist
Maggie face-butts the cushioned chair and lives, laughs and says mama
Candle party vs. sex party
Should be subsidized by school district
Telling way too much about your lives . . . hmmmmm
Lengua for Betsy is too gross for Kris
Chef Betsy
iPod video will reign for porn and 14 year old boys
Kris's Marlboro iPod
The last name thing, for women as property?
Kris at femanine alliance to watch chicks make out
Habitat for Humanity for Betsy
Nick (hosty of SledHead Radio) house burned down
"Kris, I burned down the house. Apologize to me", Betsy
Kris would would take the computer first
Susan this inappropriate story is for you
Maternity belts for men

Tags: betsy kris garage house sale

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris Ep. 84

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 06:16:55 -0500

Croncast - 2005-06-03.mp3

Show: #125
Length: 33:03
Format: mp3
Bit rate: 64 kbs
Size: 14.0 mb

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris Ep. 84

Today's show is about world view with the anology being our choice of arctic dwelling or final days on a piece of drift ice. I feel like I just got back from the arctic with my cold, but by Monday I should be back to full voice ;) (not quite sure what 'full voice' is).

Betsy puts out a call for Eskimo listeners to send us a message, denies the existence of Macaroni penguins. See below:

Betsy: this is a macaroni penguin.

Thanks to everyone who voted so far at Podcast Alley for the show! If you haven't voted yet this month take some time and click the image below.

Vote at Podcast Alley with the "Vote Croncast" button above.

Some people have had trouble voting at Podcast Alley and unfortunately there is nothing that I can do to fix it. We've made Chris aware of the problem but I think to fix the problem would break more than it repairs.

Kris tells a story of young love, dirty street action and how 30 year old men are not really invisible when they are staring. The story goes something like this . . . "Excuse me, are those two chicks making out over there?" The answer was, "Yes. Twice."

Check out the other guys from the Naperville Blogger/Podcaster group:

Evan Brown - InternetCases.com
Rick Klau - Tins
Mike Marusin - marusin.com
Henry Treftz - who's blog I can't find because he was closeted for so long ;).

Tags: croncast betsy alley podcast kris