fell | Croncast - Life is Show Prep

Season 23 Ep 02: The Penthouse, Bedazzled Shirts, Purse Selling Zombies

Fri, 15 Jan 2010 15:44:52 -0500

Show: #537
Length: 28:09
Format: mp3

I can't tell you the story off the show
There is safety on the show
A good tight story
Directors cut?
Just tell me the story
Three undred people waiting to get in . . .
And then us
Yeah, with you I don't think club with a 'K'
It looks like John Goselin fell from an airplane and exploded
All too much
The 6'8 400 lbs bouncer comes over
Failed arena football player
Heading to the penthouse party
Yes, I'll take you up right now
I don't fit at all
The head neck move dance all together
We make our way in
Turns out it is a Penthouse part
Not a penthouse party
Was TMZ there?
They see you the music stops and they ask who let this guy in
Schlumpy midwestern guy, who let him in?
I was on the of the line
Sure the Pussy Cat Dolls were doing there show
Did they say i gotta go to the bathroom
No, but they did let me know I might not get in
Leave you outside?
Yeah, but I totally understand
Gonna make it happen
I know that you know that I am impressed
You aren't making eye contact with me
We get into the VIP area
That was it
Didn't know what to do after that
Then the free drinks began
They brought out the Cristal
It was a cliche of cliches
Everyone is loving it
The AVN awards ends and the adult stars start showing up
Every Ed Hardy design was represented
Bouncers couldn't figure out who or why we were there
Let me tell you what we were doing while you were partying
I took Maggie to a craft shop
Where?
On Canal Street
Nice
Yeah, I was attacked by purse selling zombies
I would call you from hell, but not bother you from heaven
That's marriagr
The store was half empty
Right, cuz all the embroidery thread was needed for the shirts in vegas

Tags: Pure Las Vegas VIP Penthouse Party schlumpy Ed hardy

Season 21 Ep 24: The Mexico Part 3

Tue, 31 Mar 2009 11:52:03 -0400

Croncast - 2009-03-30.mp3
Show: #524
Length: 41:24
Size: 38 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

When, when, when, when
This was supposed to go out Friday
Maggie has been insanely sick
What happens when you read all of these Oprah books?
It should come with a six pack of Xanax
Difficult times?
Write a book
You need to change your name to Kristina
Sending email as Kris Smith
People would respond to me as a woman<
br> So I had to make it Kristopher Smith Wait, Mr B
I have to give a shout out to Carrie, thanks for coming to my show
The Mexico Part 3 begins now
Betsy, you are at the buffet, go . . .
If I had known that they served guacamole breakfast, lunch and dinner
Standing at the buffet
A woman sidles up next to me
"What part of Canada are you from?"
I speak like that because I lived in Milwaukee for a few years
Where's that?
Wisconsin
Is that a big city?
All the push ups that you do
They could throw a rock at it
She was wearing the crocs
Then I scanned the room and it was covered in crocs
That is he face of colonialism
Later . . .
I'm the only American
What is the most expensive shit you got behind this bar?
Grand Marnier on the rocks the entire trip
Do you want to know how to cook the guacamole?
He was like a bull fighter
Super hot
Fellas watch out for this
They will whisk you wife away
The Italian says, "You mean this prison"
You must leave this compound
They will take you to the jungle
They get electricity for 2 hours a day
It is wonderful
Deciding to go deep see fishing
How did you get over the shark fear?
We were stuck at the front gate
How many signs do you need?
It was like a road block
We were there on a gift certificate
I'm thinking that this will be so nice
The authentic Mexican experience awaits
We get to the place
Sure, it would have have been authentic
But didn't the charter company name tell you all you needed to know?
Captain Rick's
It should have
Yeah, if it were Captain Ricardo's
On the boat with a Canada
They start swearing at us in Spanish
Turns out I am the only one that knows it
I kept my mouth shut
Betsy catches Dory (see photo in post)
"Chocha Grande"
How is the fish doing?
Mas muerto
They pull it back into the boat
Cut up Dory and turned her into chum
We had Captain Bicho
More protected species were caught
Chopped and chum
Chocha account is over 11 at this point
I'm the bloke, right
Don't be a chocha Mr B

Tags: Crocs Canadian Tourists The Mexico GrandMarnier

Thank you for letting us entertain you!

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:38:57 -0400

Most of you knew that we were putting the brakes on this beast, but for those of you that didn't or are catching up . . . we hit our 500th episode and are putting Croncast to bed.

We've had a great time since November of 2004 putting out shows. The rewards from doing this show are too numerous to list but the few that stand out are meeting so many great listeners and fellow podcasters through the years. You guys have shared many insights with us and let us know that our experiences aren't so dissimilar from your own.

The best part is that we aren't done creating shows!

Starting on June 27th, 2008 we will still be cranking them out 3 times a week at Life in the Can, but with a special twist. We'll also be producing a weekly episode that is the best of all three shows from that week, with a special twist.

Yep, I wrote that twice.

The weekly episode will use the previous three episodes like they were brainstorming sessions and we'll pick the best bits and re-record them. We want to push ourselves in another direction and utilize the same skills that I have used for years producing audio for clients. It's time to try something new with our own show.

For the next few months you'll be able to get the new shows through the regular Croncast RSS feeds so that you won't have to resubscribe to the new show right away, though, I'd recommend it. You'll be able to decide which of the shows you'd like to receive.

One last thing, our entire Croncast archive will remain online for the foreseeable future so that anyone can enjoy the shows.

We hope that you'll join us over at Life in the Can in a couple weeks and get your laughing fix with Betsy and Mr. B.

Thanks to you for making this so much fun!

Tags: Croncast 500 shows Kris Smith Betsy Smith Life in the Can

Season 20 Ep 24: Cousin Kris, Painters Cap, Nothing Is Level

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:28:11 -0400

Croncast - 2008-06-16.mp3
Show: #499
Length: 22:52
Size: 15.7mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Keep the Archive Alive goes on
$25 of support gets you 2 DVD's with the full archive mailed to your door
Drop that Archive Support at the site in any one of the banners
It is all about the Interwaves
The photo montage of the father's day trip are up
Look in the blog for the story
Soften up the crow's feet
Geez, that bag, what is she 33?
I don't know if Rock of Love is comparative to competitive improv dinner theater
The afternoon jamboree
Much like licking a toilet
"Cousin Kris!"
The first Casey's we stop at
Hey, I know you
No, I didn't know her name instantly
Hoping for it fire into my brain
Turns out to be cousin X
She's of the normal branch
But the odds of that
Not that great
Running into someone buying smokes
I just don't want to get there
I know, Betsy, you were driving 45 in a 75
Never thought we would make it
Creeping ever closer that sucking vortex where you grew up
It is an area of decay
Dilapidated nothingness
If you were a pizza deliver guy you would deliver to houses with siding
The rest are wrapped in Tyvek
It looks like depression
We tried the town route
Elliot is asking why it is abandoned
Yelling why doesn't it look like home
Two taglines
"For Rent"
"Rent to Own"
You wouldn't let me take the best photo
It was the award winning shot
It was beautiful
The transient neighbor
In a wife beater, smoking a cigarrete, talking on his phone in a NASCAR painters cap
And . . . And . . . his white wolf dog on the steps
Nothing is level there
I fell down 77 times
Growing oriental poppies
Couldn't believe it
Save me from this
And you walked away
Everyone walked away to leave me there
The scary compound
The old ass car wasn't as bad
Always had the perspective that there was someplace else I needed to be

Tags: white wolf chevrolet graveyard interwaves abandoned small town

the toad sees all. well, maybe just me.

Wed, 14 May 2008 15:08:44 -0400

we've lived here for four years and i've never had anything fall in this window well before.

today it has been a bunny and now two toads.

next shot i hope to post is stacks of $100's that fell from the sky into the window well. fingers crossed.

Tags: window stacks post fell sky

Croncast Listener Survey Results Continued

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 18:27:16 -0400

The results continued. These were the likes and dislikes of fellow listeners.

What Listeners Like
Date	Comment
01/30/2008	Its hilarious attitude
01/10/2008	The way they talk about their lives, it is hilarious and endearing all at once.
01/07/2008	The chemistry between Kris and Betsy and the humor.
01/02/2008	Betsy and Chris are funny and real people.
12/31/2007	Very funny.
12/29/2007	real
12/28/2007	They are ""My People""
12/26/2007	Betsy & Kris are great together! The fact that they talk about ""nothing"" & can create a funny show out of it reminds be of Seinfeld. You guys ROCK!!Keep it up.
12/20/2007	The humor. They are normal people who actually like and support each other.
11/02/2007	Host are very entertaining
10/29/2007	Betsy!
10/23/2007	The hosts are great, its real life only funny
10/23/2007	Extremely funny
10/22/2007	it's hilarious!
10/22/2007	I like the hosts personally.
10/18/2007	This is the funniest podcast out there. I feel like they are my friends.
10/11/2007	they are so fucking funny!
10/04/2007	It is constantly entertaining, my favorite podcast out there.
10/03/2007	great banter between hosts
10/03/2007	Betsy and Kris do a wonderful job of airing out their lives on the air in a way that is real, funny, and sometimes even JUST A Little bit uncomfortable. Their lucky they got all that expensive equipment between them while their doing the show. In the future I see bullet proof glass..... LOL Just kidding. The show length is perfect, spot on, no waste on predetermined montages or business or reader mail or anything that's just filler to try and get a longer show. about 30 minutes or less is PERFECT. They're both Hilarious (a little respect for the Bear).
09/13/2007	I love the energy between the hosts
09/10/2007	they make me laugh out loud! and i can relate to them.
09/07/2007	lively realism
09/07/2007	the ""humaness"" of it
09/05/2007	Funny!!!
09/05/2007	Kris's laugh
09/04/2007	hilarious!!! Love Betsey and Chris, they are so funny and personable
09/04/2007	Kris and Betsy make me laugh out loud all the time.
08/29/2007	The interaction between Kris and Betsy
08/29/2007	The fact that I feel like I'm in a similar boat. Former cool guy/punk rocker turned daddy dearest.
08/29/2007	Betsy and Kris are so funny and entertaining.
08/29/2007	The real world approach to podcasting.
08/27/2007	betsy and kris
08/26/2007	Kris and Betsy are PRICELESS!!! I enjoy everything about this podcast. They are parents just like my husband and I and I can really relate to most of what they talk about. Keep it up!
08/22/2007	Honest, funny, and always entertaining.
08/06/2007	Betsy and Kris are hilarious. It's just a fun part of my week to listen to them.
08/03/2007	funny entertaining,
07/30/2007	The hosts are very entertaining.
07/29/2007	the humor. the hosts don't take themselves too seriously.
07/11/2007	The way Kris and Betsy interact.
07/10/2007	the hosts
07/09/2007	The humorous banter between the hosts. Hilarious!
07/09/2007	Great personalities, good audio quality, consistent and reliable.
07/06/2007	Betsy Smith
06/29/2007	They're a couple like me and my wife. Living vicariously through them, at times
06/19/2007	You guys are FUNNY! These questions are funny - I especially like the one that asks how much confidence we have in your ability to select cars... ;)
06/19/2007	The funny Hosts. Betsy is great.
06/16/2007	It's funny most of the time.
06/15/2007	The hosts
06/14/2007	Hilarious!

06/13/2007	FUN!
06/10/2007	They are funny and witty. Its a perfect combination of ornery and nice!
06/09/2007	I like everything about it. No special part. All of it. Takes me back to my young parent days!
06/08/2007	We(wife & I) and the podcast team are at the about the same place in life. I relate to what they normally talk about.
05/27/2007	Betsy! The real-life stories are extremely entertaining.
05/26/2007	I truly appreciate how Kris and Betsy allow me to share their lives. At times, Betsy make the mundane so hilarious that I've had to pull the car over. Thanks guys.
05/25/2007	Rapport of the hosts. Great conversational quality.
05/15/2007	Great back and forth banter between hosts. They are realistic, funny,and honest. Show reminds me of Seinfeld in that it's a show about nothing in particular just the quirks of life. I can relate with both of the hosts humor, and to Betsy's addiction to thrift stores. When Mr. B laughs really hard it's so funny!
05/13/2007	it's funny and charming to hear two people that like each other and are able to joke about each other.
05/13/2007	cool people
05/11/2007	The honesty of the hosts.
05/09/2007	Genuine Humor & the way the hosts mesh with each other
05/02/2007	Both Kris and Betsy. Their personalities complement each other perfectly. The interaction between them comes off as very ""Real"", They turn the mundane into entertainment consistantly. After all....life is show prep.
05/01/2007	Fantastic humor
04/30/2007	Chemistry between co-hosts and commentary on real-life events.
04/29/2007	It is entertaining and fun.
04/29/2007	Kris & Betsy sound authentic
04/28/2007	the day to day life of betsy
04/21/2007	The everday humor.
04/21/2007	Two people, funny
04/15/2007	The funny banter!
04/12/2007	They are the most ""real"" married couple on the planet -- absolute pure honesty and openness.
04/09/2007	The comedy aspect
04/05/2007	Chris and Betsy are very funny and creative folks.
04/02/2007	excellent humor, friendly hosts, good storytelling
03/23/2007	Croncast was a charming podcast in the early days; it becomes more difficult to listen to as Chris' ego expands. Betsy remains a joy to listen to.
03/13/2007	It's funny!
03/12/2007	The Hosts
03/07/2007	Hosts and everyday conversation that keeps me laughing.
03/07/2007	The interaction between the co-hosts and great story-telling.
03/07/2007	The hosts
03/04/2007	I have been listening since January of 2005 and I am totally hooked! Chris and Betsy are extremely funny and entertaining. When you listen to them, it is like having a conversation with your friends. I listen on my iPOD at work and I am constantly laughing out loud. The sound quality is excellent! It is definitely professional sounding. I took this for granted until I subscribed to other podcasts with poor sound (and ended up unsubcribing to them). Keep up the good work!
03/03/2007	FUNNY! (and real)
03/01/2007	Honest conversation
03/01/2007	They're my age and I can relate to the things they talk about. They make me laugh.
03/01/2007	Their relationship and how they both make me laugh: one by her stories and the other by his laugh! They are wonderful people and they have made me feel like one of the family.
03/01/2007	the hosts, content and audio quality
02/28/2007	very entertaining and fun
02/28/2007	They are just fun to listen to. Betsy is funny and so is Chris. I look forward to each episode.
02/27/2007	the hosts! The natural way they interact with each other and the hilarious things that come out of their mouths.
02/27/2007	The hosts are very funny. It reminds ne of sitting with friends in a social situation and discussing and making fun of various topics.
02/27/2007	Relationship between hosts
02/27/2007	It's fun to listen to... What else could there be?
02/26/2007	I like this podcast because I like to listen to people with lots of problems.
02/26/2007	It's funny. It's about every day life as a married couple and as a family. They pay attention to listener's feedback.
02/26/2007	Betsy
02/26/2007	Funny, good storytelling, reality based
02/26/2007	Hosts/content/Reliability
02/26/2007	I love the hosts - Kris and Betsy. They are very transparent and real and completely fun to listen to. They make the basic stuff of life hilarious.
02/26/2007	The interaction between the hosts. The stories about everyday life.

02/25/2007	The interaction between Kris & Betsy and their good outlook on life.
02/25/2007	lively, animated banter
02/25/2007	I just can't quit them.
02/24/2007	it is human and it is funny
02/24/2007	Good off-the-cuff humor.
02/24/2007	Kris and Betsy make me laugh and are just generally likable.
02/24/2007	Down to earth naature of the hosts, humor, excellent story-telling
02/24/2007	I'm an American living abroad and I listen to this religiously ... not for news, just to hear what everyday folks are up to. It's funny and interesting. This podcast rocks. Betsy and Kris are the greatest.
02/24/2007	Exceptionally engaging, funny hosts, warmth, interesting content, very high production values.
02/23/2007	the hosts
02/23/2007	Always funny and interesting
02/23/2007	Chris and Betsy are funny. It is very entertaining.
02/23/2007	Funny and comfortable
02/23/2007	the humor and interactions between the hosts
02/23/2007	I look forward to listening each week because Kris and Betsy are so entertaining. There is NO other podcast out there that gets me laughing the way they do.
02/23/2007	They are hilarious and personable. They amke you feel like you're listening to friends. But funny friends.
02/23/2007	this is the most awesome podcast that I listen to, Betsy and Chris are the best and incredibly funny. There shows are always entertaining, no if ands or buts
02/23/2007	I have no idea. It is infectuous though. They are good together.
02/23/2007	Rapport between Kris and Betsy. Overlap between my areas of interest and life issues and theirs. General witty and clever and funny outlook on life, even when it sucks.
02/23/2007	Chemistry of the hosts.
02/22/2007	they are just like us...but my goatee is shorter and i have hair on my head
02/22/2007	laid back, down to earth, Not a big production, can relate with hosts
02/22/2007	Kris and Betsy are extremely funny, down to earth, real.
02/22/2007	I really enjoy Kris and Betsy. I love their relationship and their interaction. They're very funny.
02/22/2007	Betsy is funny as shit... Kris is like robin to her batman
02/22/2007	Rapport between hosts.
02/22/2007	The ability of the Host's to play off of each other's humor. Play arguments.
02/22/2007	I really enjoy the fun the hosts have with each other. The closeness of their relationship comes through in each show.
02/21/2007	The hosts are great! Open, honest, funny and real. This is one of the five best podcasts in the known world!
02/21/2007	Nice mix of humor and serious topics. Nice banter between the hosts.
02/21/2007	Consistently entertaining
02/21/2007	They make me laugh everytime, in the way that my friends make me laugh...they are great fun and as a married person i highly identfy with some of the stuff they talk about.
02/21/2007	No ads. It is honest people talking, it doesn't have a staged quality to it.
02/21/2007	Hearing a married couple deal with similar issues that other 30-something couples face, but in thier own unique way.
02/21/2007	It is extremely funny and entertaining.
02/21/2007	the hosts
02/21/2007	Real people. Real situations. Funny as all get out.
02/21/2007	Kris
02/21/2007	the hosts
02/21/2007	Kris and Betsy are really funny and could be my next door neighbor except better.
02/21/2007	Life the Smith way!
02/21/2007	Lively private conversation between married folk
02/21/2007	I LOVE BETSY and Kris :)
02/21/2007	The dynamics of Kris & Betsy. They just have interesting conversations.
02/21/2007	The hosts are one of a kind. My wife and I can really relate to them. They are very enjoyable to listen to. I can't count the number of times I have laughed out loud while listening. They should get paid to do what they do.
02/21/2007	It's kinda funny sometimes. You can listen without really paying attention
02/20/2007	It is extremely intelligent and absolutely hilarious...very engaging!
02/20/2007	personalities
02/20/2007	The dynamic between Kris and Betsy is wonderful. Their relationship isn't perfect, but they obviously love each other and that's what makes it great. Plus they are both EXTREMELY funny.
02/20/2007	Content, Hosts,

02/20/2007	The realism. The bickering. Reminds me of my wife and myself. Just bickering sometimes to have something to talk about, pick a fight just to fight and get over it and have fun.
02/20/2007	The chemistry between Kris & Betsy.
02/20/2007	the humor of the hosts
02/20/2007	It's a slice of life that's clever and funny. The hosts have a wonderful rappor with each other and I love how they are able to make you feel like it's all in fun, like no matter what underneath it all they love each other and that's all that really counts.
02/20/2007	Honesty. Hilarity.
02/20/2007	The easy way that the hosts are able to interact with each other. Even when they are slightly ticked off - they will laugh easily and they project their relationship into the podcast. All technical details of the podcast are A+.
02/20/2007	honesty
02/20/2007	The personalities of the hosts.
02/20/2007	the humor. I can relate to them and the way they interact as a couple. I highly enjoy the banter and fun wacky topics.
02/20/2007	the frequency of podcasts, content, humor
02/20/2007	It's hilarious
02/20/2007	Comedy
02/20/2007	Kris & Betsy
02/20/2007	Reel life with real friends.
02/20/2007	Humor & relationship between hosts
02/20/2007	As half of a married couple living in the suburbs of Detroit with two kids, I relate to the content of the podcast. They make me laugh!
02/20/2007	It cheers me up.
02/20/2007	It makes me laugh
02/19/2007	Kris' laugh and Betsy's sense of humor
02/19/2007	The hosts - Betsy and Kris (the side-kick). They just brighten up my day.
02/19/2007	Betsy's ability to put up with her husband's interesting viewpoints.
02/19/2007	It's funny.
02/19/2007	very entertaining
02/19/2007	People involved it's the kind of show that only works with Betsy/ Chris so it's hard to pick anything you can do more of
02/19/2007	I like the banter back and forth between Betsy and Mr B - they argue like my husband and I do. Also, the frequency of the episodes. 3 times a week feeds wonderfully into my attention deficit disorder ;)
02/19/2007	The Hosts
02/19/2007	The chemistry between the hosts is wonderful. Betsy is hilarious. Kris seems like a completely genuine, nice guy. Together, they are entertaining and seem completely ""for real.""
02/19/2007	the great sense of humor and intimacy of the hosts.
02/19/2007	Chemistry between the hosts Quality of editing
02/19/2007	banter between the hosts.
02/19/2007	Kris and Betsy are terrific! Their conversations are the highlight of my week!
02/19/2007	everything
02/19/2007	it's fun to listen to.
02/19/2007	I love the chemistry that Kris and Betsy have. I also love how they can tell interesting stories that are funny as hell.
02/19/2007	funny, real life experiences oh, did I mentioned funny
02/19/2007	The hosts
02/19/2007	Tone and sense of humor exhibited by hosts!
02/19/2007	Betsy and Kris arguing
02/19/2007	Betsy, Betsy, and Betsy
02/19/2007	The hosts
02/19/2007	Life is show prep. they have very a similar lifestyle to us. They're local
02/19/2007	Hearing real stories about the everyday life of the hosts.
02/19/2007	The hosts are entertaining and work great together. I know when I listen to this podcast I will be entertained.
02/19/2007	Listening is like having a conversation with friends
02/19/2007	Various well told extremely funny stories, the consistency of new episodes, good quality.
02/19/2007	They are funny, real, and are a great couple

What Listeners Don't Like
01/30/2008	Nothing
01/10/2008	That they're stopping! Please, do something!
01/02/2008	I wish they were making big money from the podcast.
12/31/2007	When it's not on.
12/29/2007	the hosts are hostile to each other sometimes and the man laughs at nothing
12/28/2007	format changes but since the hosts have a real life I understand the necessity.
12/26/2007	The intro & outgo.
12/20/2007	They think we only want to hear about the good times. We want to hear about the trials, too.
11/02/2007	I like everything
10/29/2007	The way Betsy disses Kris' family. I mean come on...
10/23/2007	Occasional liberal/Democratic skew.
10/22/2007	nothing
10/22/2007	No complaints.
10/18/2007	There is nothing I don't like about it. I guess only that they are not getting rich doing it because they deserve it.
10/11/2007	kris's laugh
10/04/2007	Sometimes it is too short, I wish they had hour long podcasts.
10/03/2007	no reader from webpage?
10/03/2007	I can never catch up it seems always 2 or 3 behind.
09/13/2007	nothing
09/10/2007	that they aren't on everyday!!
09/07/2007	should be daily
09/07/2007	no video associated with it
09/05/2007	nothin'
09/04/2007	Just that I'm SO far behind in listening to episodes! (About 2 weeks behind)
08/29/2007	Sometimes it's too short
08/29/2007	It's too short!
08/29/2007	The sound of running water. It makes me have to pee.
08/27/2007	its too short sometimes but i guess kris and betsy can have a life
08/26/2007	Not one thing!
08/22/2007	Doesn't come out often enough!
08/03/2007	sometimes shows are not long enough, granted, they don't make a living off this!
07/30/2007	That they only put out a show 3 times a week.
07/11/2007	The episodes are over too quickly!
07/10/2007	i like it all, no complaints
07/06/2007	Kris Smith. He simply doesn't get how life works.
06/19/2007	Nothing comes to mind about the show. I do have a suggestion for you though - how about doing an idiot's guide to RSS feeds on the show? I haven't monkeyed around enough to get the episodes to download to my pc automatically so I can move them to my phone's memory card. I think that's what RSS is for, but I haven't had the time to mess around with it to figure it out. I know Kris knows how to do it - why not do a 5-minute tutorial on the show about how to do it? -Jennifer in San Diego (your alter ego, Dave's, wife)
06/19/2007	Life is sometimes a little boring....
06/16/2007	The new intro music.
06/15/2007	Nothing
06/10/2007	can't think of a thing
06/09/2007	There is nothing about it I don't like. Keep up the great work.
06/08/2007	They interupt each other during stories and go off on tangents, and sometimes forget to finish the original story.
05/27/2007	I have very little that I dislike about the show.
05/26/2007	I would not change a thing. I was glad to see the music between segments go.
05/25/2007	That is isn't every day of the week.
05/15/2007	Not much I don't like about the show, but one time they had a guest on, a female family friend who they were trying to find a boyfriend for and she had the worst east coast accent. It wasn't kind on the ears at all, especially for west coast listeners. It sounded like nails on a chalkboard.
05/13/2007	Kris annoys me sometimes. I think he thinks he's funnier than he is.
05/13/2007	sometimes weird edits
05/11/2007	Beginning music, abrupt ending, the bits of music throughout (nice idea, but they don't work).
05/09/2007	Way to much bad language

05/02/2007	Since the return of the show it seems like something is missing. I'm not sure exactly what it is. Also some of the shows seem to be rather short.
04/30/2007	Sometimes a little too much time is spent examining the clammy white underbelly of middle-American life.
04/29/2007	the language makes it difficult to listen to around my kids
04/29/2007	Can't think of anything
04/21/2007	Nothing, I love everything about it.
04/15/2007	The fact that they feel they need to edit themselves for us.
04/12/2007	Nothing.
03/13/2007	The cussing.
03/12/2007	It is too short
03/07/2007	Wish it was more often ;=) I think the website is a bit confusing.
03/07/2007	there's not really anything i don't like.
03/07/2007	nothing
03/04/2007	Not much to dislike. Maybe a show one or two times per week instead of three.
03/03/2007	nothing negative, really
03/01/2007	Episodes too frequent, twice a week would be better. Don't have time for 3 episodes a week
03/01/2007	I've just started listening and I caught a couple episodes where Kris was sick so it was 85etsy and that just didn't work as well. You need the calm of Kris to even out the excitability of Betsy.
03/01/2007	They don't podcast 2x's a day every day forever and ever and ever..duh!
03/01/2007	I can't listen to it around my kids.
02/28/2007	nothing
02/28/2007	not much
02/27/2007	I dont expect everyone to like everything but it bothers me occasionally when Kris gets adamant on how much he dislikes bicyclists or pets.
02/27/2007	Sound of mother-in-law's bath water running in background.
02/27/2007	Unnecessary use of strong language in an otherwise pretty family-friendly show.
02/26/2007	The cussing!!!
02/26/2007	sometimes, not always it can be a bit long.
02/26/2007	Not much to dislike
02/26/2007	Pretty much no complaints.
02/25/2007	The times when I want to scream at them when they're about to do something really stupid with their money again (cf. Slowsky, calculating eBay earnings but ignoring the fees)
02/25/2007	would like more frequent shows
02/25/2007	I just can't quit them.
02/24/2007	The host's sometimes frustrating inability to see how they sabotage themselves in reaching their goals.
02/24/2007	It makes me very uneasy when Kris and Betsy argue.
02/24/2007	Not often enough
02/24/2007	Hosts occasionally talking over each other.
02/23/2007	nada
02/23/2007	I wish it were every day. :)
02/23/2007	nothing...
02/23/2007	I wouldn't change a thing! My only worry is that someday they'll burn out and stop podcasting. :)
02/23/2007	huh... nothing...
02/23/2007	that it isn't everyday.
02/23/2007	The fact that I can't put my finger on why I can't stop listening to it.
02/23/2007	Month-long breaks ;)
02/23/2007	When they have to take time off. Though I understand.
02/22/2007	strange women lying around in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government, supreme executive power comes from a mandate from the masses, not from some farsical aquatic ceremony
02/22/2007	Sometimes they skip around topics alot
02/22/2007	Its not a daily podcast.
02/22/2007	When it ends.
02/21/2007	I just wish there was more, more, more!
02/21/2007	Hosts occasionally step on one another
02/21/2007	wish shows were either more frequent or longer, although wouldn't want to see what happened to nick and jess happen to them...therefore, frequency and length are fine - lol

02/21/2007	that they are taking a break soon!
02/21/2007	The upcoming podcast boycott, er, break they are taking !!!! :(
02/21/2007	Sometimes the hosts do crazy things and I want to jump through my iPod and snap them out of their decision to do something irrational.
02/21/2007	nothing
02/21/2007	That I can't listen more.
02/21/2007	Taking month off.
02/21/2007	John Elway Dodge
02/21/2007	Kris rags on Betsy too much.
02/21/2007	Kris' angry rants. I don't like when he threatens the dog.
02/21/2007	Nothing. Croncast is great. Wait, the podcast name is little too geeky.
02/21/2007	I hate it when Kris builds some big thing up for a future episode, then it turns out he just got a new job.
02/20/2007	There is nothing that I do not like about this podcast.
02/20/2007	nothing
02/20/2007	I have nothing to complain about regarding their podcasts. Never been unsatisfied.
02/20/2007	Too short
02/20/2007	The fact that they're taking a month off. You bastards. I'm just gonna have to argue that much more with my own wife to make up for the lack of you bickering. :P
02/20/2007	Not applicable
02/20/2007	the length and frequency, would love longer shows more often (sorry guys, but I love you and it's true!)
02/20/2007	I guess it's allegience to the glossy surface of popular culture without acknowledging or investigating the bredth of possibility below that surface - but that is just a token issue, I had to think about it to come up with something I didn't like.
02/20/2007	It's not a travelling vaudeville show.
02/20/2007	Sometimes I wish the hosts would seek the help of some financial planning professionals. They could then be more confident in the choices they make - and relate on the podcast.
02/20/2007	making a big deal about something that is boring?
02/20/2007	The fact that there aren't 5 podcasts per week!
02/20/2007	only complaint is that it's not daily!
02/20/2007	There is nothing I don't like about this podcast
02/20/2007	Sometimes Betsy is too mean to Kris!
02/20/2007	Not much...
02/20/2007	A live event would be interesting to hear.
02/20/2007	Swearing / foul language
02/20/2007	Sometimes Kris and Betsy's real life interupts their ability to get shows out. But... that's life.
02/20/2007	sometimes the same topic gets discussed over and over again
02/20/2007	I like everything
02/19/2007	That Kris and Betsy aren't making any money on it! They are hysterical, I would pay for that!
02/19/2007	That Betsy and Kris sound like they are about to give up doing the podcast.
02/19/2007	Chris' political views.
02/19/2007	Not much.
02/19/2007	i wish it were every day
02/19/2007	Same as above, jsut hard to think of what you can do less of
02/19/2007	hmmmmmmmm...I wish each episode was longer? Because I'm greedy like that?
02/19/2007	Nothing
02/19/2007	Nothing! It's fabulous the way it is!
02/19/2007	sometimes repetitive subjects, and episodes just to churn out more episodes even when they don't have too much to say
02/19/2007	swearing
02/19/2007	I wish there was more!
02/19/2007	I really don't have any complaints about this podcast.
02/19/2007	nothing
02/19/2007	the dog
02/19/2007	Very little. I'm not thrilled that the hosts are taking a month off, but I know this is a big time commitment for them.
02/19/2007	Betsy and Kris talking about the dog
02/19/2007	Sometimes the hosts are braindead.

02/19/2007	Nothing
02/19/2007	Would like to have more episodes per week.
02/19/2007	That they are on only 3 times a week. But that is me being selfish.
02/19/2007	Nothing comes to mind.
02/19/2007	Only 3times a week, :)

Tags: Croncast Survey Kris Smith Betsy Smith Advertising Croncast Demographics

Season 19 Ep 21: John Adams, Hershey's Floor, Lock Picking Kit

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 08:30:15 -0400

Croncast - 2008-03-17.mp3
Show: #468
Length: 30:01
Size: 20.7mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

It's been a couple weeks
It's good to hear your voice baby
Stasis soon, I said
That was work
Thanks to Josh Bancroft for the message
Betsy was just attacked
It is no one else's fault but yours
You are to blame
I was watching a show about John Adams on HBO
Which is a sign your balls are reaching your knees
What were you watching?
Oprah's Big Give
I heard it is horrible
Yeah, it is pretty bad
Mom decided to go to bed
I thought I would pick up her old dog and carry it upstairs
I am talking about my empathy for this cold hearted bitch
I reach down to pick up the dog
And what do I get
That bitch attacked me with her one good tooth
She inserted it viciously into the palm of my hand
I got the hysterical laughs
Don't make me put the dog to sleep
She was laying on a piece of Zeus's bone
That is why she bit
I know
This is on page one of your baby book
Your mom tried to get your dad to do something he shouldn't
You love chaos in your life
Why else would I be married to you?
You look at a situation that appears to be calm
And you can find the chaos
How can you disagree with me?
I can't
That brings me to a story Mr. B
Jeanie is moving on up
Up where
Here you doofus
You neglected to notice that your children aren't in school
You have set precedence with this
Yeah, I have dropped him off twice with no school
Hello
So we take Elliot with us to go and look at rental homes
That is a good idea
Jeanie calls up a property management company
We have three houses lined up
Is that foreshadowing? Is that what they call it in the biz?
For $1100 a month what do you get?
The lemon yellow peeling paint house
It was made for a Model A
If you kick out the stick it all would have fell down
Couldn't tell where the house was
How could you not?
We saw it and the Psycho music played
Jeanie is polite
We went through with it
Why?
Maybe there is something fabulous here
Gluttons for punishment you are
I used to launch my He-Man action figure from the cloths line
Nifty, I feel robbed
If you only had one He-Man toy why did you treat him so bad?
They would have changed my name to Poindexter
You'll understand that when we open the side door
It was a smelly out of Cops house
The poor wife who was shackled to the bastard who owned
I am going to laugh because I am scared
Different paint in rooms
Different borders
This one looks like your mom put it up after a bottle of Smirnoff and Scope
The boards on the floor didn't even touch
No one sanded the floor they just painted it brown
It was a Hershey's floor with gaps
Slops of brown
At the next house he can't find the key
He busts out a lock picking kit
The place looks beautiful
But we see a ring around the walls
It had flooded and they never cleaned it up
I looked behind the wet bar
There were mushrooms growing out of the baseboards

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here! Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

Tags: He Man Jeanie lock picking kit rental house Oprah's Big Give

Season 19 Ep 17: Small Fry, Baby Face, Knight Rider

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 09:49:40 -0500

Croncast - 2008-02-15.mp3
Show: #463
Length: 43:23
Size: 29.8mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Jeanie is in town
Leaving some comments
The guy who sells stuff on tv
Getting our first C&D
You've got to be kidding me
The links come from Ebay
Didn't want to be told
It's all ESC fault in the first place
If you get one too ESC let me know
I will roll over like the big pansy that I am
Go to Google and
Stipulation is owning those two words put together
Like I own Mr. B?
Now if you say it I am going to sue you
I will find all
I copyrighted Jeanie's CB handle 'Small Fry'
Career choices
Look she married me
One wild crazy idea
Jeanie's face
I got you something earlier this week
I got a job
Where is my present?
I paid for that
I'm going all out
Did you squeeze some ground beef out of tube
Guys, I am trying to get a career
We know Betsy
What happened to Wheel of Fortune?
Not gonna happen
Just get back to people tell them it isn't working out
Find me the chubby stay at mommy stay at home comedian
Like my improv career that I pay for
The gig fell apart
It was an association party
They don't want
Is the man in the basement telling me that I don't get out enough?
It is your lack getting out
Yeah, we're gonna perform during dinner time
I had a flash back of the belly dancers at the conference
Holding napkins over crotches slinking off
The belly dancing went down
At the next party there was a bondage demonstration
The year before they had the painted women
Ewwwwwwwww
Jeanie might recognize them from the lot lizard count
Anyone named Velma under 72 is a lot lizard
Isn't your grandma named Velma?
Yes, she is older than 72
Did the people even want you there?
Jeanie dated that guy
I didn't date anyone on the road
For technicalities sake, you did have a trucker boyfriend
What was his CB handle?
They called him "Baby Face"
Baby Face and Small Fry
Did he have to sit on a telephone guy?
Baby Face turned you into a trucker
I thought we were going to talk about my resume
Karen Zhender gender bender
Why don't you eat your weight in free cake and we can blow this popcorn stand
For out last performance
"Whew, last one"
Passing on the highway
We chatted with Knight Rider
He had to pick is own CB handle
You and who? You said we?
Me and Sweet T
Jeanie, I love these stories
Where else did you work?
As a 911 dispatcher
No way!
You've got to have good stories
He was in the evidence 'shed'
Shed?
When you destroy guns you saw them in to pieces
He was sawing
Friction and a bullet in the chamber
He swore that he checked
Officer Twinkie shot himself in the leg
Stopping speeders

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here! Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

Tags: Knight Rider Jeanie Bowen Velma cb handle

Twitter background guidelines

Sun, 27 Jan 2008 10:21:12 -0500

Ever wanted to make an interesting Twitter background? Here's how I did it.

Side note: This post comes to you straight from an email reply to fellow long-time podcaster Michael Geoghegan in regards to my Twitter background.

Also of note, this layout works best on higher res monitor settings. I imagine that most active Twitter users that are going to be viewing the site as opposed to sms or mobile versions are on high res settings. That said, let's roll.

Creating your background
-----------------------------

File Dimensions: 2048 px by 1707 px (no clue why i used these dimensions but I am sure I knew what I was doing at the time)
Branding Dimensions: 80 px by 587 px
Coordinates: X=20, Y=14
Horizontal position: 20 px from the left (give yourself some padding)
Vertical position: 14 px from the top (will line up your graphic with the top of the twitter logo. our eyes like symmetry) File size and type according to Twitter: "Images must be smaller than 800k. GIF, JPG, PNG."

Aesthetics
------------

Color palette: Pick colors that match that with default Twitter stylesheet colors. If they contrast too much follow the Change Background directions above and change the colors for Text, Name, Link, Sidebar fill and Sidebar border as needed.
Recommendation: Choose colors that work with the default and save yourself the headache of matching the CSS to your image. Follow Twitter's lead.

Uploading your background
------------------------------

Change Default Background: Login and click 'Settings' >> click 'Design' >> Select 'Use my custom style below' radio button >> Upload your image

It took me quite a bit of time to get a background image that I was happy with. There was a lot of editing and uploading again, and again until I got it right. I would suspect if you're like me your experience will be much the same. So have patience when getting it just right. And remember that you are working within someone else's website and can't control all the features.

Update: This is the background that I based this tutorial on - Croncast background all by itself if you want to use it as a guide.

Here's my current background at work (note: it is now free-form) - http://twitter.com/croncast.

Tags: template size twitter background Michael Geoghegan twitter

Naperville nerd posse member gets more ink

Wed, 10 Oct 2007 10:08:59 -0400

Fellow Naperville nerd and flafoo.com halfsie, Mike Marusin, will be getting some ink very soon. The online version of an article that he appears, "Is it time to move to the suburbs?," by David Hochman, is up already but it'll be hitting the stores and mailboxes soon on the pages of Details magazine.

Nerds are real men too.

I had no idea House of Pain drove Mike and Liz to the suburbs but I can see how that is likely with the confluence of rap addicted white kids from the suburbs that migrate to the city . . . to be cool.

Maybe this is the new circle of life? I can't wait for the National Geographic video on this.

Tags: Mike Marusin David Hochman Details magazine Naperville flafoo

Other things I do, more podcasts

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 21:28:09 -0400

At Gnomedex last weekend I recorded a ton of conversations with friends and fellow nerds.

I released them as podcasts over on my work blog. For the nerds that get this feed some of this stuff might be of interest to you.

Podcasts from Gnomedex 2007:

Adam Metz - LaunchSquad.com
Hans Chung - PostReach.com
Steve Fisher - StartupSpark.com pt. 1
Steve Fisher - StartupSpark.com pt. 2
Greg Cangialosi - BlueSkyFactory.com
Doug Kaye - Gigavox.com
Chris Brogan - ChrisBrogan.com
Mark Chernesky - CNN.com
Jeremy Wright - b5media.com
Aaron Brazell - b5media.com
Stan James - Lijit.com
Josh Hallett - hyku.com
Chris Heuer - ChrisHeuer.com

Also, good friend Greg Cangialosi shot some video of those interviews. The first of the set you can see me puffy cuffed and the other you can see me done up in a feedburner (r.i.p) t-shirt.

Download video

Tags: Gnomedex 2007 Aaron Brazell Greg Cangialosi Chris Brogan Chris Heuer Stan James Doug Kaye

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 01, 2007

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 10:42:30 -0400

Croncast - 2007-08-01.mp3
Show: #392
Length: 1:05:10
Size: 44.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 01, 2007

Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

We've made it into the month of August
You've now crossed into Elk Mountain Resort and Valhalla Shooting Club
Sure you don't want to bitch about Boulder some more?
I like Boulder, there are just some things I don't
We roll up and there is a guard tower
Was he standing there with a rifle?
No, Mr B
It is a gorgeous view
Flanked by beauty
The guard comes ambling up to the Volvo
Your names ladies?
We give them, remember this
"Do you ladies have any firearms with you?"
No firearms in this Volvo
This wagon is clear
He gives us directions
We roll on up
Elk Mountain Resort is beautiful
The valet pulls it four feet away and parks
The woman on hotels.com just kept complaining about it
She is nuts
Jeannie says the place is like Annie
Everyone stands to greet you as you walk in
Then there was Santa Claus
A dude with a white beard and red suit?
No, he had a uniform and a "I love my job smile"
He's got hot towels on a silver platter
He looks at me and says, "Mrs. Smith would you like a towel?"
He looks at Jeannie, "Mrs. Smith would you like a towel?"
Shit, the deal is sealed, we are the dykes
Welcome to first class
It took us 9 hours from Boulder
We'll make everything guided for you
What time would you ladies like dinner?
This Mrs. Smith would like to eat before 7:30
Mrs. Smith and I would like to eat in 45 minutes
Santa has an ear piece and a chest mic
He talks into it and poof the bell hop appears
We get to our room and the view is gorgeous
If you don't like it dial "0"
The bed looks like a cloud from heaven
I got Wal-Mart sheets
Jeanie, "We have robes!"
Hers and hers robes would have been nice
So we get dressed for dinner
It was intimidating, we felt like we didn't fit
Then I bust out the gift certificate
We wanted to play it cool
Sure, you want to fit in
They were nicer than your grandma who hasn't see you in three years
Every time you walk in the door the staff stands
Oh, are you ladies here for dinner?
I'll announce you, then he speaks into his lapel, "The Smiths are here for dinner."
You haven't told them yet?
No I was waiting for Jeannie
Who's the man, the big footed one with a bad perm
Are there any other guests at the resort?
Two other men not talking
There were 10 total guests at the resort
We order our dinner and they ask for drinks
My mom always orders the house wine, the cheap stuff
I'll have a Mountain Dew won't go over well
Jeannie hates red wine but follows Betsy's lead
Hi, I'm Chef Jeff, which house wine is best for you?
They start bringing out bread baskets and baked stuff
Chef Jeff is like, "Fuck dude! I worked on that all day and you can't say it."
I look at Jeannie, I can tell she doesn't like it
Been there and done that
Jeannie is woofing it down
I have to eat at least half of it
The two men eating alone are now joined by someone I recognize
The owner that I had seen on The Daily Show
Kris if you kick it up a notch we can do this every weekend
He comes over to the table
Asks what activities we are going to do
ATV's and shooting
We are the only resort in the entire world to have access for ATV's
Jeannie, "I love the outdoors but I can't go up high"
Our ATV's are automatic
They've thought of everything
Yes, everything
On the ride you will come to a place called Top of the World
So high that airplanes will fly below
Then he launches in to the special lights
These are based on the biologic make up of a lobster's eye
They are used to melt the snow to make an ice tunnel
Mr. Foreman continues to talk about the press they have gotten
A book on the NYT Best Sellers list is based at Elk Mountain Resort
He had me sold . . . I wanted to kiss a bear and drive to the top of the world
Why would you think that you couldn't do something?
Tom Foreman makes you believe that you can do anything
Enter the rest of the guests
Three sets of couples that look like my neighbors
Fit soccer moms?
Yes, Kris
I just drove 4 states over to get away from them
Now they are going to spoil my mountain view
Mr. Foreman goes over to the new couples
The super sweet firebox
Then our food comes
Every time there was another opportunity to be put in our place
We were still really awkward
Betsy has a bowl of puss and I get a bowl of noodles
It was couscous Jeannie
Jeannie starts to panic, all I get are these noodles
Campbell's has everything including broth
Then they bring the broth
After that they bring out dinner
The whole thing was terrific
Except that we were both completely terrified
To get over the petrification of being treated so well and Elk Mountain Resort stay more nights
Kris you are the king of upgrade
So after dinner Santa jumps up
We get our bill after dinner
Betsy goes white
Shut up Jeannie, I'll tell you later
The one thing you can't return is food
What I was freaking out about was that our house wine turned out to be $18 a glass
From their perspective, the lesbians aren't satisfied
Chef Jeff asks if dinner was to their liking
Then Thomas comes over and asks
After that the waitress comes up
Sure, they are trained like the CIA to read unhappiness
What would you ladies like to do?
We would like a jacuzzi?
Our eyes meet and we realize . . . they aren't out to get us . . . they are out to spoil us
Drinking our sangria in the hot tub
The cheap wine was awesome
Betsy took 100 pics of the tops of trees
At the Boulder art fair there was a dude with aspen photos
So we retire to the room and Jeannie puts on a robe
Sliding into the bed of heaven
Mrs. Smith, this is going to be the greatest night of my life
The greatest part of this is that I have no kids to wake me up
Betsy wakes up at 6:01 for coffee and viewing birds that were probably released for my pleasure
Do you know how much this is costing per minute? Get up Jeannie
We decide to take a hike
We start to walk by workers that gardening
When they see you they stop, stand, smile and ask you if you need anything
Landscapers saw us, they froze like deer
When we went by them they commenced working again
Tom has thought of everything
When a crossed eyed man in golf cart tells you "good luck" heed his warning
People are freezing along the trail "I'm a tree. I'm a tree. I'm a tree"
Maybe the trail was made for someone who came one time
Betsy, they did not release cows into the national forest for you to view
Queue the cattle
Someone left it on the comment card no doubt
Gotta watch out for the feral cows
Jeannie was petrified of them
Now you know why he told you good luck
That guy used to not be cross eyed till a cow incident
We can hear them shrieking and yelling
There they are . . . the soccer moms on the zip line
Whew, my Nike sports bra is twisted
We are on our way back
Jeannie freezes as we stand on Have you told anyone that you are not Mrs. Smith?
I see two brown ears rising out of this draining ditch
Out jumps a giant mule deer
Betsy chases it to take it's photo
The lesbians are crazy!
What are the lesbians doing now?
Time for lunch on the patio
We need some cigarettes and an ashtray
"Can I have an ashtray?"
She speaks into her cleavage mic
Around the corner, "I'm on it"
I know it is fun to play spies but this is weird
It was awesome though, instant ashtray
Lesbians are on porch, queue deer
Queue the geese
Then the soccer moms come bouncing back fit and tan
"Where are you guys from?"
Bloomington. "We are going to drive through there."
Their husbands, reserved and uptight
Screw it, this is all about me
I am going to make the soccer moms laugh
She swore that she was thirsty and all the sudden water showed up
"Guess how many kids we have?"
I don't know this is a game?
We have 10 combined?
How many are girls?
One
Then they struck a bad ass soccer mom pose
They brought things like running shoes
Betsy brought Crocs and sandals
Perfect lesbian gear
The soccer moms told us that the ATV's were awesome
We get ready to go and Misha shows up
I have done this ride 500 times and not lost 1 person yet
She takes out these top gun flight suits
I brought you the biggest ones we have
Betsy, "Of course mine won't zip up"
Jeannie, "neither will mine"
Jeannie you rock!
This could be customer service boot camp
Their motto must be "we are not going to tell you no"
They actually import vans from Europe to fit through their gates
Probably because it is more aesthetically pleasing
This is my new motto, "It is all about me"
Betsy gives me the thumbs up and then hits a tree
So we're going up the mountain
Jeannie is flying behind Misha
Betsy is stuck
I look down and my left hand has the brake so tight that I won't move
When you got on the quad the Unitarian in you took over
It was trying to save you
Oh, I'm sorry when was the last time you drove an ATV up a mountain
Betsy is trying to avoid the sticks
"Mam, that is an all terrain vehicle. Run over the sticks."
Hitting trees really hurts
Right before we get to The Top of the World
I look up and it is all Aspens and cattle
Jeannie starts to freak
Get me past that cow so fast
I am getting away from that cow so fast
Kris, we got to the top of mountain
You can see Utah, three mountain ranges at 9000 ft
We both had brown mustaches
It added to the lesbianism
Every time Betsy talks to the staff it is about her husbands and kids
Talk into your chest, the lesbians are not lesbians
These people are awesome
Misha ran a camp for bad ass kids
Like outward bound? Way scarier
Working at Elk Mountain Resort is top of the food chain
You have got to put in your time
John of course is an ex-Navy Seal
He is bad ass
You feel amazingly comfortable and slightly scared
I love men like that. Don't you Jeannie
Sure, he was handsome too
OK, time for this podcast to end
We ended on the ATV's and it was time to drink
Don't hand the truck driver the bottle
Four or five inches of vodka
Kris, we almost drank an entire bottle of vodka
Jeannie is naked in a robe and slippers
We are ripped
You are so awesome . . . No, you are so awesome
I look at clock and it is 9:00 p.m. and we haven't eaten
We dial "0" and they tell us that the dining room is still open for us
We arrive and there are flames to the ceiling
Chef Jeff is making bananas foster
The soccer moms start to speak to us
Betsy with her vodka mouth
"Are we going to be on your webcast?", soccer moms
Jeannie loves it when I get out of control
"We should introduce ourselves"
No that is OK, I already have a name for you, "The bad ass soccer moms"
It could go either way
Then the leader dies laughing
Right, there has to be an Alpha mom in the group
Yes, the one with the longest Escalade, the EXT
So Chef Jeff comes over
Betsy, "A-1 Jeff we're trashed. Can I call you Chef Jeff from now on"
That's not chatting it up that is drunk babble
Chef Jeff really made it
We don't go to gourmet restaurants and have the chef talk to us for 40 minutes
It was entirely phenomenal
Kris, I know we have talked about how I challenged the Russian to a vodka drinking contest
Can I take it back when you order the most expensive item on the menu?
And I was on the urge of vomiting
Kobe beef times 2 with bananas foster
Betsy looks at me like you better eat that bitch
Chef Jeff is buying us drinks
And I have to deny him because now I can't see him
I don't know where I am at
We stumble back to our room
There is that point, where you realize that I am done my man
Jeannie deals with Betsy, I am sick
I will lay in the bed of heaven
Betsy has the her cigarettes and the camera around her neck
You ticked me off
You don't like me anymore?
I'll like you tomorrow
You just ripped my underwear and are out of control
I proceed to go to the most beautiful bathroom in the states
And I don't even have to use my muscles
I have an exorcism of the most expensive meal I have ever ate
More babbling from Betsy
Typical Betsy move, "I made myself throw up"
This is the best planned bathroom of all time
6 feet from toilet to wall on a slate floor
Betsy made a bed right there with a Turkish robe
And I fell asleep on that cold stone slate floor and it felt so good
As I was falling asleep I thought to myself . . .
I love John, Misha, Chef Jeff and I love Tom the most
Why? Because he was smart enough to put a twin bed in the water closet
I don't know what we were thinking by drinking so much
I have nicotine and alcohol poisoning . . . I need to dial "0"
We have to do another show for Valhalla
It was the most emotional day of Jeannie's life
Sorry about your underwear dude
I'll get you a Target gift certificate
These were Victoria Secret
Do you know how much stuff I will have to find and sell from Goodwill?
Final installment of Elk Mountain Resort and Valhalla comes your way tomorrow!

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Tags: kobe beef bananas foster Elk Mountain Resort Valhalla Shooting Club Chef Jeff bad ass soccer moms

Betsy and her husband Kris Jul 04, 2007

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 08:22:52 -0400

Croncast - 2007-07-04.mp3
Show: #382
Length: 32:47
Size: 22.5mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Jul 04, 2007

Tickets are on sale now for the live show . . . get your's or find out more

Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

The live show is coming
Happy 4th of July fellow Americans
The country is older, I'm older and you're older
What are you doing, Kris?
You had no idea it was a holiday . . . you're a nerd
Someone's going to be expecting you to leave your computer
Nerds need boundries
One of the reasons you make a good husband but damn
Today and only today, you are the greatest husband
Booba, I've been married to you for over 3000 days
It's time for a break, Mr. B
Three days of joy for me at Elk Mountain Resort
Betsy driving from here to Boulder with Jeanie and the kids
We saw it on the Daily Show
Betsy got her gift certificate for the resort from the Radio Shopping Show
They got stuff for kids
Right, a wading pool with pellet guns
They will be teaching him kane fighting
Betsy's conservative side is taking over
Off to the training ground
Survivalists with an edge in luxury accommodations
Betsy calls them up
Yeah, we no longer are open to the public . . . we are members only
But we are accepting the remainder of the gift certificates
If I call and hear Best Western and Glock shooting range, I turn that down
Not that this is anything close to a Best Western but the added weaponry, man
My husband won't be coming but my friend will be
Only two people can sleep in the room
Nope, no two certificates for you
She thinks that you and Jeanie are, you know
Who cares! I am going to eat Kobe beef in bed
So now that Kris is going to watch the kids for me and Jeanie
You fell at my feet, bowed and begged
Yes, Betsy begged to go on this trip sans children

Betsy is yelling that it is the 4th and I need to go. Talk with you guys soon.

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
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Tags: boulder vacation the resort vacation without kids Best Western

Forget the iPhone, The Flaming Lips iTunes original is boss

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 21:21:38 -0400

Who needs an iPhone when you've got great music and commentary? Apple released, or the record company did, an iTunes Original for The Flaming Lips.

I fell in love with their music when At War With the Mystics came out and have been earnestly combing through their catalog on iTunes. The early stuff is great but doesn't have the same vibe that Mystics has.

The track I'll be jamming on for the 4th and the next few days is a noisy version of Free Radicals.

Tags: The Flaming Lips Apple iTunes Orginal At War with the Mystics

Let's get ready to rumble

Fri, 04 May 2007 11:17:00 -0400

Fellow Naperville nerd buddy Rick has set the stage for a nerd night out like no other. I'm pretty excited about this one since it will involve punching . . . De La Hoya vs. Mayweather tomorrow night.

When do nerds ever resolve to hit one another? It's almost as rare as a albino rhino. "Huh huh, I'll use my Google juice against you. Or I'll unleash some proxy based email storm upon you. Heh he, heh he."

Maybe we can do some Wii boxing and Rick will give me a chance at the title? Hmmmm . . .

Tags: De La Hoya Mayweather set the stage title fight Wii boxing

Real French Maids tracking web buzz

Thu, 18 Jan 2007 09:04:21 -0500

Google translate sends us a visitor (see what we look like in French), awesome. Was it wii friend code, john elway dodge, beck, dr. oz?

Nope. I believe it was a real French Maid (I am only guessing, but I think it is a socialist French Maid union of some type) tracking internet buzz about 'French Maids'. It is possible that they have hired a new web savvy maid that doubles as a secret agent consultant to ensure that her fellow sisters around the globe are being treated well.

So, Tim, you better look out. Soon your maids are going to organize and might just want benefits beyond tight polyester outfits and internet fame. Good luck my friend.

Tags: French Maid TV FrenchMaidTV Tim Street French Maid Union secret agent

Betsy and her husband Kris Dec 20, 2006

Wed, 20 Dec 2006 06:30:44 -0500

Croncast - 2006-12-20.mp3

Show: #316
Length: 33:01
Size: 20.6 mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris December 20, 2006

Today's show is brought to you by Jason Corbett
Looking across at Betsy
She looks like she is 5 minutes from rehab
She's wearing a black wife-beater with no bra
Baby, are you ready to party?
I'm back from the battlefront
I'm not sure what volumizing foam is
I was off to be the world's best slightly damaged reseller
Formulating a plan with her apprentice Vicky
What do they go for on eBay?
The hooker references run thin
The day started off on a bad foot
Maggie wanted to know why she's not in a cart
Who are these well behaved babies?
Kate Spade garden tool holders
Dooney was the next stop
I was prepared, I had done the research
I have never seen you look like this . . . beyond disheveled
Trying to look like a mommy
Isn't professional shopping illegal?
Every woman on the face of the earth is technically a professional shopper
They know people do this . . . they sell more units
Maggie looks around and lets out a primal scream
Carry the baby out in a duffel
It appears that someone stuffed my baby in a duffel bag
Pacifying the child with treats
Goodwill experience is that all the items are for play, not Dooney
Maggie loves purses, pink and tacky pink Dooney's do it for her
Cookie in a bag
We have this plan
Do you think that grandma would like this wristlet
It's day one and Kris gets to say I told you so
Everything that was there that was good is gone
Yep I get to say I told you so
Out of Dooney and over to Coach cause the plan is failing already
Whole store 20% off
But the items sell in store for the eBay price
Coach purse creed
Fakers usually don't bother
Betsy changes the subject to the Wii
I am sore from the Wii, Betsy
The tennis is really awesome, I'm halfway to pro and I haven't left the basement
Who else get's you to do something three times a week
I some domains . . . I forgot this on the show, thanks to Craig's idea
Here's the video

Fat people listen to me, a fellow fat person
Seeing the side profile in a mirror
Rick was almost knocked out with my man wings
We're going to try to lose some weight
You just called me fat
Here's the doman . . . www.wiiarefat.com (ready saturday)
You're tricking me into blogging again Kris
I love your plan, small favor I expect payment
Betsy wants a nanny
Kris, you can pick the nanny
You might be the only woman on the planet who tells her husband you pick the nanny
Yep, pick a hot one I don't care
Seeking one nanny willing to get implants, paying minimum wage
Do you trust the minimum wage sitter?
Terrible parenting, I'm not going to talk about it (not our parenting)
She can talc down my man wings
They are man lumps
Kris reads the inch comment email that came in
You gain an inch for every 30 pounds, this lady is happy
Special meaning to pinch an inch
Two people are enjoying those extra inches

Tags: Dooney and Bourke outlet Coach outlet wiiarefat.com Kate Spade garden tool holders professional shopping

Belated TECH cocktail 2 homage

Tue, 17 Oct 2006 13:04:02 -0400

Me and Ed Kohler.

Last Thursday, like many (about 350) other Chicago area nerds with ambition, I attended TECH cocktail 2. It was a great time. For me, I ended up hanging out most of the night with my usual posse - Mike and Rick, but got to spend some extra time with show listener and fellow tech Brian Beatty who took the photos you see here. Check out Brian's photo stream of the event.

Thanks to Eric and Frank for putting this event together and making sure that it has the right vibe. And I would be a total bastard if I didn't thank Jeff Pulver for picking up the tab for my Sprites and everything else after the first hour.

Like I mentioned on the show following the event there was some video shot by Technology Evangelist that might get released. If you see it released and I haven't mentioned it send me a link.

I gotta share this photo with you . . . Rick looks like I just told him the dirtiest joke in the world about a Priest, a bartender and a midget.

Tags: TECHcocktail2 TECH cocktail Chicago Naperville nerds

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 06, 2006

Fri, 06 Oct 2006 07:07:04 -0400

Croncast - 2006-10-06.mp3

Show: #281
Length: 31:00
Size: 21.3 mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris October 06, 2006

The emails cam flying in yesterday for the painted chicks
Well, it is your eyes . . . check out one here
It's a frontal and Betsy feels sorry for this woman
Why didn't you go to Denny's instead?
Pale pudding faces and thnking what a sexless group
The post I mention is referenced above
Street-walker shows on HBO
Kris can stop watching . . . Betsy can't
She is a fan of the train wreck
How much can I pay you to get dressed right now?
Kris wants to rehash his Expo excitement
We're both going next year
Betsy SMS messaging turns me on . . nerd love
Basking in the stardom of Betsy
My phone just called Betsy randomly at Expo
She was surprised that I was speaking
Listening through my pants
Nerd brethren I can talk it up
Again with the name drops from dinner
Big shout out to Rick, Rick Klau
Betsy says I can tell a story
No Betsy crutch
Betsy sets her self up to tell her story
3 children heavy at Goodwill
Betsy's apprentice pulls one over on her
Elliot fell once he never stood back up again
Here's the bag on eBay
Betsy flirts with Tubby the Love Bucket for a shot

1) Fill out the appropriate form for you - *New* Listener or Get a Handle (current listener)
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4) 300th new listener and the person whose Handle they use win iPods AND
5) A drawing for 2 more iPods from everyone who entered!

Tags: HBO Goodwill painted chicks PME SMS

No show today, worst weekend ever

Mon, 22 May 2006 08:49:17 -0400

there will be no show today. this was the worst weekend of my adult life and got worse last night. i'm sure it ranks high for betsy too. i would have thought the vasectomy would have been worst, wrong.

starting thursday night maggie got sick, friday elliot, saturday morningish like 3 a.m. betsy got into act vomiting and many trips to bathroom for expungenation of all that is evil.

i thought i hade made it out of the jungle and at 5 p.m. last night it fell on my like nell carter slipping on a banana peel. no vomitng for me but the bathroom knows me well and i am etremely nauseous.

look for us wednesday.

Tags: croncast no show today sick flu in may

It's official, I'll be speaking at Portable Media Expo

Thu, 18 May 2006 05:55:56 -0400

Well, it is listed on the Portable Media Expo schedule so it's official. I'll be speaking about my experience starting up and running a podcasting production company, Palegroove Studios, and how other experienced podcasters can do the same through consulting.

What? Tell people how to become your competition? Sort of.

Think about how many web designers and developers there are today. Now, imagine if there were only about 100 in the world that were considered 'experts' and could be trusted to get a job done professionally. Could they handle all of the work? There's plenty of available today for more than 1000 podcasting consultants.

To say the least, I am excited about this opportunity to share some of my ups and downs over the last 1 1/2 years. I am probably more willing to share my downs since there have been more of them, but each one an excellent teacher.

Last but not least, fellow Naperville geek drink compadre and friend, Rick Klau, will be speaking also. He's got duty explaining and evangelizing RSS on the newbie front. Looks like geek drinks will go mobile.

Tags: Portable Media Expo conference Kris Smith Palegroove Studios Rick Klau

For those on the nerd tip, FeedBurner Report

Tue, 18 Apr 2006 13:11:53 -0400

A friend of the show and myself, Rick Klau, has posted some amazing data in a report released today by FeedBurner titled, "Expanding Universe: Podcasting Market Update". The report covers many aspects of podcasting thanks to Rick's keen eye on the community and his participation in it.

This report is a must read not only because it highlights one of the podcasts that I produce but because it will open your eyes to how many of your fellow humanity are subscribing and producing podcasts.

Way to go Rick! And kudos to FeedBurner for putting a report like this out with REAL, up-to-date statistics that aren't 9 months old at the time of publication!

Tags: Rick Klau FeedBurner Podcast Market Update Alltel Racing Podcast

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris 145

Wed, 09 Nov 2005 22:11:32 -0500

Croncast - 2005-11-09.mp3

Show: #186
Length: 44.11
Size: 30.3 mb
Format: mp3

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris 145

Show Notes

The one year anniversary intro
Betsy and I never remember any big event
I get it with podcasting not with real life
Kris bets you will be disappointed
This is not a best of
No jerking it with laptop included
"We're Coming Over" - DVD + CD + goodies - MORE FRIDAY
Things fell apart this weekend and this week
Men get breast cancer
This was recorded over the weekend
Regular stuff and Kris' health issues
I'll be getting an ultrasound
Giving birth to twins
Cranking up the ultrasound
Urgent they said, I need fixed
The one year archive "We're Coming Over" - More Friday
The DVD will include Maggie's snot
Let the show begin
Set-up clip from the first Croncast with explaination
Who would spend one day a week with Kris for nothing?
Betsy likes the old Kris voice, not podcast Kris voice
Musical interlude while Boy Scouts interupt us
Perpetuating the Pinewood Derby
Six shooters on the tin can
Liberals just give in, we are so weak
It's against God
Real Pistolas
The voice through sweat sock
It doesn't come through the ugly mics
What is different with the set up
Clip from the second Croncast with Betsy
What if they like me better than you and you get fired by administration
My negative attitude is gone, nope
8 year gestation making cash on the Discovery Channel
People do like Betsy more than Kris
Pitching podcasting to Betsy
My entire life became the show
Lost gourd over podcasting
Kris' obsessive patient love
It is baby sitting when daddy does it
Betsy does it for one year and now she wants something
Betsy lays down the pregnancy gauntlet
Right afterwards there is a dillusional state
Being the tree, the wrinkly parts
Georgia O'keefe wrinkly trees
Clip - hiring the handyman
9 am and it is too dark to change light switch
Swearing so much on the show
Mother-in-law will always point out
Working parents have no social life
Cleaning routines and cubicle life
The difference in convict speech patterns
Getting more Betsy
The redneck and the dipthong
DJ Kris playing Jolie Holland and Broken Vegas
"You know what?"
Getting booted to the basement
Spending most of my time in the basement (like now)
A sliver of the pie chart "upstairs"
I need a chair rail to pee in the cat litter
The M-W-F switch was a big deal for us
Betsy wanted to quit at that time
No more nerdery
My mother has told me
Taking part in what is damaging your marriage
He has a little problem there
Betsy does the shout outs
We wrap it up
DVD + CD set is not limited edition

Give us a review at Yahoo!

Tags: betsy kris croncast year life

Croncast - Betsy and her husband kris Ep. 38

Wed, 16 Feb 2005 10:58:08 -0500

Croncast - 2005-02-16.mp3

Show: #75
Length: 35:26
Format: mp3
Bit rate: 64 kbs
Size: 16.2 mb

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris Ep. 38

TODAY IS SHOW NUMBER 75!!!!

So as unceremoniously as usual Betsy and I forget the fact that we got some press today and talk on about how she backed the van into my Lincoln and broke off the mirror, the wobbly-eyed nurse from the last time we had a baby, who's getting fixed and how.

Last but not least we also talk about the launch of Palegroove Studios and how the site still isn't finished or ready to go but enough procrastinating about the word is out.

Links to the discussion about Palegroove Studios:

Blog Herald
Social Twister - Gregory Narain (fellow podcaster)

Tags: croncast betsy talk studios palegroove

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris Ep. 33

Wed, 09 Feb 2005 10:15:32 -0500

Croncast - 2005-02-09.mp3

Show: #70
Length: 19:29
Format: mp3
Bit rate: 64 kbs
Size: 8.92 mb

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris Ep. 33

Today's show is a Betsy hostile takeover. Not really But she talks a lot today about her pregnancy, forgetting about her auctions, the PTA meeting she attended last night *laughing like you wouldn't believe as I type this*, hot lunch, no time for pizza man, haze of Marlboro smoke that Kris grew up in and finally Bety's suburban mommy guilt.

Did Betsy or Kris say these?

"I was supposed to live in the city and be single and having sex and doing drugs until I fell over at 40."

"I need a beer and a cigarette . . . this baby's still in me."

Tags: betsy kris croncast husband ep