march | Croncast - Life is Show Prep

friday marching orders - desk of kris smith

Fri, 04 Mar 2011 14:14:44 -0600

Dairy Ripple, Crockpot Love, The Shaman

Wed, 03 Mar 2010 16:45:45 -0600

Show: #557
Length: 29:15
Format: mp3

To listen to this and all new Croncast episodes Get Cool!

Hey, it's March already!
We're webified on the mobile front
Get your iPhone or Android phone out
Now go to www.croncast.com/mobile (if you click this in your browser on your computer you won't see it :) . . . phone only)
Judging when the crockpot is done
It's food that is made with love, just without care
Ladled food is about love
The presentation is not that hot
That is vanilla pudding
Crushed graham crackers
I am complaining about your
Sexy, just like I got out of womens' prison
New girl at the Dairy Ripple
Creeping over my waistband
Is that contagious on that kid?
Then she speaks no English then
Let me tell you about the cat
He's got issues
I take him to the vet
Out of the shadows comes this shaman guy
Like on Scooby Doo?
Yeah
And he was wearing a coral necklace
The aggressive New York
All the drama
Your cat is still hypothyroid
Oh! And if you use the Twitters, check out Ville - http://ville.ag

Tags: shaman webified crockpot dairy ripple scooby doo

Season 23 Ep 22: Sampler de Croncast

Wed, 03 Mar 2010 16:33:34 -0600

Show: #557-Sampler
Length: 5:31
Format: mp3

To listen to this and all new Croncast episodes in full Get Cool!

Tags: shaman webified crockpot dairy ripple scooby doo

Season 21 Ep 21: Doggy DNA Test, Marsupial Wife, Trustafarians

Fri, 13 Mar 2009 13:10:28 -0500

Croncast - 2009-03-13.mp3
Show: #521
Length: 30:57
Size: 28.2 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Here we are
March 13th, 2009
Yep, I said it
iTunes has a new fancy feature
Still us reviews
"Betsy's good...Kris is better"
The studio space, manpit remodel has helped my mental state
What are you reaching for?
Betsy is wearing a hoody
Paper in front pocket
My marsupial wife
Doggy DNA test results have arrived
I wish you get down with the fact that Herc is a porn star
My fauxberman is . . .
Want to find out? We get into at 1:50 into the show
He's 25% nothing?
WTF? how much did you pay for this
Finding out what composes a vajayjay slayer
His doberman shining
American terrier? uh no
Picking him up from the rescue
I expected as everyone else did he would be full grown dobie
The Amex Full Panel Mixed Breed Analysis says . . .
Well, my emotions are getting the best of me
No more pitbull in sweater photos please
Betsy's new show is rocking like crazy
Elliot's teacher is sitting front row
Oh, baby
You're like a stress bunny
Sure when you were baked
You have to check out Betsy's facebook profile
See her college shots that Jeanie uploaded
Do you have a trust fund too?

Tags: dog dna test Amex Panel Mixed Breed Analysis fauxberman trustafarian

Season 21 Ep 17: Fly home stoned, Polyester rugs, Gesticulate freely

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 12:37:27 -0600

Croncast - 2009-02-27.mp3
Show: #517
Length: 27:26
Size: 25.2 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Get it on
Leave us some comments here or reviews in iTunes
Not really vicious
But spousal hate
Funny on many levels
A paid gig for Betsy
Will you be on IMDB?
I don't know what you're talking about
March every Thursday
Five other chicks all under me
Sounds like my kind of life
It's all coming together
Adam Carolla is now on the podcasting
Maybe we need to hire him
Six women under me
I want to write that book
Re-organized the basement
I had to get it on
Needed to change up my space
This winter is killing me emotionally
Short shorn polyester rug
It's 85 colors and shades of testosterone
Been stuck down here working for so long
I got a bit claustrophobic
Proud you cleaned up
Making space
I was afraid to touch your desk
Now I can gesticulate freely
It's like we're single again
Right from your mother's clutches to mine
You would be perfectly happy at public storage
Don't ship Grandma's meds via FedEx
So she can fly home stoned
Right, like God intended
Sherlock in Mumbai

Tags: Adam Carolla Podcast FedEx mule gesticulate freely Sherlock in Mumbai

A Cinch message for March 06, 2008 1:03 PM

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 13:03:52 -0600

Download size: 213.83 KB

Tags: BlogTalkRadio Cinch Kris Smith Croncast

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 04, 2007

Mon, 04 Jun 2007 07:37:52 -0500

Croncast - 2007-06-04.mp3
Show: #371
Length: 34:31
Size: 23.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 04, 2007

Tickets are on sale now for the live show . . . get your's or find out more

Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

Pick a post, any post to leave us a comment
Betsy starts the show by flossing with her own hair
Keeping in natural
Betsy gnawing on her hand
Kris says, "epididymitis" got his body part skin layers a bit off
Just swinging with the kids
Catherine the Great I am not
Why would you do that?
Are you kidding me
I've got the death march covered
I got a layer food to keep me alive for any miles long walk
Driving by all the closed down health clubs
They always open, they always go out of business
Locally owned and operated
Mega health clubs
Now the locals have signs like 27 months free
I asked who the hell would go there?
My dad
Le Beau's Health Club Aurora
Let the porn music play
Picture my dad as a tour guide
Using a lighter with your eyeliner
Le Beau's used to be in the country but now is surrounded by subdivisions
He would sit us down with a role of quarters
Maybe is just seedier in my memory
Mr. Le Beau comes on TV
We can't just keep open with the big
The leather bathing suite
I think it's great
I always thought Judy was fabulous
Cheated printed suede
Life Time Fitness is the one you are talking about
Everybody that joins gets a chubbiness check right away
The people come out with the pinchy things
It's fear marketing right your face
I know I'm fat, why else would I be here
They're telling you that you suck, you're worthless
And people are so sold on it
But if you work really hard you might be as cool as the receptionist
Waiting for the real estate class to start
She's 26 taking a stress test at Life Time?
Do you need another reason to hate yourself?
Lifetime is a fitness cult
They do it like other cults by getting into your head
Then they take your money and that of your other family members
And next is the indoctrination of your friends
Oh Mr. B
Busting my ass on eBay
No I'm not bitching at you
The Resale Queen post about the baby stuff
Jenny Rush rocks!
She stepped it up for the person here
Don't worry, Jenny Rush signed an NDA for our address ;-)
The first 6 months of his life she watched him during the day
Yeah, he had about 12 seizures today
Sure but it worked out because her son had the exact same type of epilepsy
He turned out okay, right Betsy?
Yeah, he became a doctor
No, he's gay
Kris, it doesn't get any better than a gay doctor son!
Who's gonna take care of you
If Elliot grows up and becomes a gay doctor I will join Life Time
What Jenny did was really cool
I am having that same sort of feeling that I had about 1 year into podcasting
There just is this network of people that keep doing things that we normally wouldn't be able to do because of proximity
Kris, this is the way that women take care of each other
All, I wanted to find was to find someone with a bigger trust fund than mine
And then I got you Kris
I got a trust fund!
A Folgers can full of Marlboro points up in the cabinet at my folks house
"You could have anything that you want baby, We're halfway to the pool table"
If I could hit rewind Bears
I would marry someone else, lived with him for 30 years, waited for him to die and then hooked up with you with his money
Oh, baby, I feel your bitterness
We go through the up periods and downs like everyone
Lately the introspection is a result of what great fortune has come to some friends
Their lives 3 years ago were completely different
For them it is a best case scenario type thing
Betsy is going to put her top 10 reasons that Naperville will change together

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: Catherine the Great LeBeau's Health Club Aurora Marlboro points Folgers can Life Time Fitness

They call it hiatus in the biz

Sun, 04 Mar 2007 10:10:26 -0600

Post title . . . makes me laugh every time I say it or type it.

Anyway, I'm getting around to making these posts, finally, four days into our break for March. It has been crazy around here. When isn't it, right?

I wanted to notify the blog only people of the things that we are offering this month to catch people up and to make downloading archive shows easier.

Check this post, "Catch up with us while we are on break," from earlier today in our news section to see what I am talking about.

Tags: croncast archive archive croncast podcasts betsy smith kris smith

Catch up with us while we are on break

Sun, 04 Mar 2007 09:18:23 -0600

For those of you with a desire to catch up with the show while we are on hiatus (cause that is what they call it in the biz, ha!).I have created some really kick ass automated RSS feeds that do some cool stuff.

The first is the catch up with us in 22 days. The podcasts are sent one for every weekday in March. The 22 archive shows were selected by Mike Marusin, Betsy and myself as a retrospective of what a Croncast listener might like to hear again and a newbie should hear for the first time, like the vacation shows.

The second is a feed that will send you a new show every weekday until we quit doing the show. Seriously, it will just keep sending you a new show every weekday out of the archive from with the date you sign up. Enjoy!

Feel free to ping me or leave a comment with any feedback you might have.

Catch up in 22 weekdays

Catch up in 22 weekdays RSS

ARCHIVES - There are a few ways to download archived shows besides clicking the green "download" button for every single show.

1. This way is kind of cool . . . one show sent to you every weekday from our first show all the
way to most recent. Chances are you won't catch up to the newest shows with this feed but
it is a way to get a Croncast every weekday to brighten your morning commute!

Get this feed (only available from the Archives Page).

2. Start from the very beginning and load up! Subscribe to each one of these feeds to
to download the archives. I would do one RSS feed but it exceeds the "valid" size limit
of 200k used by most readers. How's that for nerdy?

Novemer 8, 2004 to April 31, 2005

May 1, 2005 to October 31, 2005

November 1, 2005 to April 31, 2006

May 1, 2006 to October 31, 2006

November 1, 2006 to Today!

3. Stream a playlist with iTunes, Windows Media Player or WinAmp

Tags: moderated media consumption Croncast archive feeds catch up in 22 days mm rss feeds moderated media feeds moderated media rss

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 28, 2007

Wed, 28 Feb 2007 08:07:33 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-28.mp3
Show: #343
Length: 39:12
Size: 26.9mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 28, 2007

It's the last show until April 2nd . . . and I am sick! Not on the show, but today.

Betsy and I want to thank all of you for listening, emailing, commenting and becoming close to us. Doing the show is something that we love to do and are amazed most of the time that it can bring people to laughing wildly and looking awkward in places like offices, trains, planes, cubes, cancer research labs or in their car when people pull up next to them and stare.

Starting later today there will be two nerdish ways to catch up on Croncast.

I will put up two new RSS feeds, one that will let you download 1 show per every weekday from the beginning of the show and another that is "Catch up with Croncast in 22 days". This RSS feed will deliver 1 of 22 shows on weekdays the entire month of March. It's like the first feed just for those who want to catch up quickly . . . if an entire month is quick!

And for those of you without the patience for either check out the archive page. The easiest way to download past shows is to subscribe to a set of 5 RSS feeds that I have put together and will have a little later today. That way you can download 'til your Croncast fix is met.

There are no show notes for today's show. Betsy and I have a great time to start off the show for 10 minutes and then get down to talking about something that made 2006 a very interesting year for us. You'll just have to listen to find out what that was.

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: Croncast RSS archive feeds Croncast archive spending moderated media consumption

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 26, 2007

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 06:51:04 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-26.mp3
Show: #342
Length: 36:07
Size: 24.8mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 26, 2007

Betsy cranked out some more Resale Queen posts
I added a little widget that pulls you posts into Croncast
At least you can pretend
You're like my management
No I haven't seen the scissors, just the knife
Dog head collar in a homemade envelope
There's only two things shipped in that style of envelope . . . dope or anthrax
Sending packages through USPS media mail
Only books but nothing you wrote yourself
You're gonna tell me that you pay some ogre to open dirty books?
Any likeness to the real guy "One Eye" Pete is unintended
Are postal jobs hard to get?
We're not talking about Jeanie's mom
Taking disability and as a result you can have a post office job
Kris hired the crazy guy that worked at the post office
Yes, Betsy, he talked to his soup and giggled all the time
Little white guy, glasses
Yes, he had his car stolen three times a week and refused to move
He was a Vietnam Vet
Great guy
The Boulder Vet with his Duke's of Hazzard uncle Jesse look
So he was the Boulder information booth
Maybe he was on his lunch break
The FedEx people . . . I like them a lot there more laid back
Anything beyond a lobster
Did you know that you can ship 60,000 chickens through the mail
"I gotta get these chickens to Detroit in a week. Can you ship them?"
Putting the dog on the APC at the post office
Our 16 lbs. golden retriever arrives at our destination
I want that to be us
I want to be the old couple in the RV at Cracker Barrel and watch you walk our Pomeranian
Kris standing in his overalls and shiny sports jacket embroidered with "Betsy's Bitch"
My vision is you dressed super puffy cuff with a baby bjorn with the dog in it
Point of contention and Kris's car
It's what you are doing to my car
You're destroying my car
I'm just not into details
When I pull up into the resale shop in your Jag and I have to think twice about where to park it
You need to be driving the Volvo
Fancy schemlly coffee that has spilled all over in it
I'm calling you out on the show finally to make my point
I'll fill my car up tomorrow with your money
Betsy scraps with the loose cannon owner of the local gas station
He's an asshole . . . baby no he's not
Your card is no good
Crazy eBay lady just leave
I wanted to throw a donut at him
I got men to take care of
Soap, razors . . . those are expensive Mr. B
Can't you go with a single blade?
You'll get a rough more manly look
I have been converted to the more blades the better crowd
Why don't you use the power stuff?
Coming Wednesday . . . blowing a lot of dough, Kris comes clean

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Check a news post for a new RSS feed for getting archive shows on weekdays one at a time
Send us a message or comment on the blog post soon to follow with the day of your favorite show for running in March "Catch up with Croncast in 22 days"

Tags: Resale Queen blog USPS media mail FedEx people Cracker Barrel 60,000 chickens

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 23, 2007

Fri, 23 Feb 2007 09:19:08 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-23.mp3
Show: #341
Length: 28:24
Size: 19.5mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 23, 2007

A little late, a little under the weather
Do you need your inhaler?
I had that last winter not this
I'm surprised that you don't come home with an 8 inch needle
Wrong site surgery type issues
You can only put this behind his knee
I won't even let them plug him in
You would go in for an appendectomy and come out without nipples
You never heard Pink Floyd
The Wall was built up as such a classic but
The brain doesn't function the way is used too
It's all down hill from here
My pores are getting bigger
Double and triple hairs coming out of the same follicle
The cure for cancer has been put off a day
Betsy reads the email
No more Croncast while loading agarose gel
It does contribute!
Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Betsy is going to take real estate classes!
I am so proud of you
So here's my LSAT story, Bears
Can I have that cross-stitched and hung on the wall
No being able to sell murder mcmansions is like being locked out of goodwill
I'm not like Donald Trump . . . I am keeping all of my hair
Early morning TV is quite possibly the prime example of our civilization's decline
Maggie counting with Sesame Street
Elliot has never been engaged by television
I was pack him a little hobo bag
"You can't hit your sister when she goes on on the potty!!!"
Don't forget that we are taking off the month of March
Send us an email . . . come up with some things that would make Croncast better for you
Nobody likes Dr. Phil and no one wants to be married to him

Tags: Murder McMansion LSAT testing appendectomy and come out without nipples agarose gel civilization's decline Pink Floyd

Betsy and her husband Kris Feb 19, 2007

Mon, 19 Feb 2007 06:39:45 -0600

Croncast - 2007-02-19.mp3
Show: #339
Length: 33:12
Size: 22.8mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris February 19, 2007

Witty, smart or tired when you make your comment
Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

So we're taking a month off
Remember that March is a desert of Croncast
Over 300 times of the same style
I didn't come here for you to insult you Mr. B
I'm going crazy Mr. B
I have been in this house for two weeks (ahem)
I think you have left plenty of times
Getting up at 4 a.m. with the kids
When I am gone I miss that
Man, that's early . . . there is nothing going on that early
Why are you putting out lunch at 10:30
My Kashi has made it's way towards the exit
I'm so disappointed Mr. B
I signed up for Weight Watcher again
I gained a pound
It's impossible
How many pounds did you lose the first time around? 120
Not eating fast, Kashi and other high fiber foods
That's not it baby it is portions too
"I can eat the hell outta something," Betsy
That is the wrong phrase if you want to lose weight
I'm not even eating the shell
That taco salad, Maggie could get lost in that salad
Portion control baby
Take a lesson from Bears
Take a lesson from someone vicariously on weight watchers
They keep you from eating the food because it tastes so bad
Spinach that reminds me of mowing the lawn
You're older now Betsy . . . you hit 30 . . . things have changed for you
"I just want some chunky monkey"
Ok, Kris, what the hell is your problem with the Murder McMansions
Jeanie called, wouldn't there be blood in the carpet?
The old telephone building . . . our own Murder Apartment
It was New Years Eve when I was 7
All the firetrucks (the two the town owned) the town's ambulance and a lot of volunteers
There was a domestic dispute and someone got stabbed . . . and died
Our new love nest was a bloodstained
No he didn't go after her, you have it backwards
Oh, I could live there no problem
She stabbed him
He probably deserved it
I just sat right over that bloodstain watching TV eating my Gino's pizza
Our next vertical move we gotta buy one
Selling your Murder McMansion
Betsy hits us with her fuzzy math purse business update
Bear, I love you like Jesus and cotton candy

Tags: Murder McMansion Kashi diet big taco salad Weight Watchers Jesus and cotton candy

Betsy and her husband Kris Dec 08, 2006

Fri, 08 Dec 2006 07:00:50 -0600

Croncast - 2006-12-08.mp3

Show: #311
Length: 29:40
Size: 20.3 mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris December 08, 2006

Betsy is going crazy over there
Earlier this week . . . this is the problem I never follow my own advice
I am a brilliant woman
Listen up. I'm going to tell you
Betsy's eBay crystal ball
It said buy Build-a-Bear Happy Feet Mumble penguin
She was brave
And everyone went out and bought them and Betsy bought . . . none
A soldier goes into battle, suck it up kid momma's gotta make some cash
Mumble's are sold out
Oh sugar what time are you done putting your shipment away?
Don't even unpack them . . . they're worth more in the box
The dog's insane barking
He doesn't belong in man pit
Some tubes just aren't connected
American Girl mini illumaroom and drawer at Goodwill
Betsy explains what it is
That's perfect for you
The mating Care Bears on the couch . . . 21 of them
Video games in foreign languages are better than Rosetta Stone
Rhymes with cube and world
What was in the good shit case
The repeat postal truck matchbox car . . . 40 in a case
Betsy is trying to make one thing happen
The stuff that Kris wants to do before he dies
Betsy quotes a Tom Waits song
She says that she'll go to a show with me
I have picked Betsy's next career . . . stealing from the blind
Promoting her to the next level
It is an easy score
Taking the kids to work at Goodwill
The tao kwon do uniform of filth
I'm out there in the trenches Mr. B.
I'm out there with those with boobs so low they have road rash on their nipples
Elliot know has a padded room
Two queen sized beds and a third mattress
Will he sleep in his own room?
Returning stuff to Costco
They would take cookie crumbs back
I have washed a lot of things in my 32 years
Betsy is going to buy term life insurance and a craftmatic adjustable bed
Why would you want to prank call them, you're 30 years old?
I am flush with Care Bears
We need to do a live show . . . with an audience
What you want to get my mom and the cat down here?
She can clap the kitty paws
We're thinking maybe in March when we come back from break
Betsy might do a new Resale Queen post

Tags: Build-a-Bear Happy Feet Mumble penguin American Girl mini illumaroom Care Bear lovin Tom Waits road rash nipples

Betsy and her husband Kris Nov 13, 2006

Mon, 13 Nov 2006 07:07:29 -0600

Croncast - 2006-11-13.mp3

Show: #301
Length: 33:02
Size: 22.6 mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris November 13, 2006

Sending email and comments by sharing
It's your birthday Kris . . . how about some home repairs
My osteoporosis kicks in and dust flies from my lungs
Listening to eat Bears is like listening to a one man band
He's not hot he's geriatric
Digging through saggy skin to find
Betsy, are you one to be talking about that
Fake beer night on the Croncast
Betsy is drinking Clausthauer and I have the Beck's N/A
You were late for your own party Kris!
What about your gifts? Shampoo is a winner
What is going to happen when Betsy reaches 31 in two months?
The wonderful thing is that you'll always be older Mr. B
Betsy is a vicious ageist Cycling through topics
A rehash of the making it to 300 and doing shows everyday
Filling our lives with craziness again for donations
Not like the NPR $1 million bounty for Morning Edition
Even the Germans are in on this one
Concerns about the donations
Slowsky at the dealership
She sits like the Sears tower in Nebraska
Betsy admits to being a conservative . . . in some cases
She may be a moderate now
Voting your conscience and not your tax dollars
The bathroom is falling apart today, see above photo
So happy birthday Mr. B now fix the house
The plan: we will be taking off the month of March 2007

Tags: Kris Smith birthday Clausthauer Beck's NA Slowsky Weight Watchers

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris 163

Fri, 24 Mar 2006 07:20:41 -0600

Croncast - 2006-03-24.mp3

Show: #207
Length: 28:09
Size: 19.3mb
Format: mp3

Croncast - Betsy and her husband Kris 163

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Show Notes

Them notes coming later!

Tags: march