monday | Croncast - From Cool to Cul De Sac

she's heading out

Fri, 02 May 2008 18:51:13 -0500

betsy is making her way into the city tonight to party like it is 1993 with her friends.

we'll have to see on monday's show how her new comedy chops work on them.

Tags: monday comedy chops work friends

Season 20 Ep 9: Improv Betsy, Four Seasons Alley, Run Kris, Run

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 09:10:44 -0500

Croncast - 2008-04-28.mp3
Show: #484
Length: 31:49
Size: 21.8 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

This is a great show, filled with drama, suspense, horror and . . . Kris lacking any common sense.

Nada on the show notes as Monday is getting very busy already. But like the last time, loud shout out to anyone who throws down and sends them in.

Tags: San Francisco homeless walgreens flashing lights witching hour

What I Know About Tweeting Flickr Photos

Sun, 06 Apr 2008 19:55:30 -0500

Most of you know that I am a stats junkie and for those that don't, well, it is now out of the way.

I wanted to share some stats about Twittering Flickr photos. I started tracking these tweets in Nov. 2007 and finally thought I had enough data that it made sense to put the numbers together.

If you don't know what the hell I am talking about check out this blog post.

Here's what I got for you so far:

152 - Photos tweeted
1,979 - Click throughs from Twitter, mobile and web
480 - Unique ip's that clicked through
12.9 - Avg. number of clicks per photo
4.1 - Avg. number of times a unique user clicked through

Highest clicked photos

39 - http://www.flickr.com/photos/croncast/2383614174/
34 - http://www.flickr.com/photos/croncast/2224866756/
29 - http://www.flickr.com/photos/croncast/2352452625/
28 - http://www.flickr.com/photos/croncast/2068538331/
27 - http://www.flickr.com/photos/croncast/2086370317/

180 - followers when I started on Nov 23, 2007
380 - followers as of today April 6, 2008

Top clicker

Bellsouth DSL user in Atlanta metro area with 74 clicks (Is that you?)

The time of day for twittering a photo seems irrelevant but Monday through Friday are the best days to do it.

That's what I have. But what about analysis, Kris? Uh, look for that post tomorrow.

Tags: Twitter Tweet Flickr twittering photos

Season 20 Ep 1: Season 20, Sybaris, Lime Gatorade

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 11:40:01 -0500

Croncast - 2008-04-04.mp3
Show: #476
Length: 29:53
Size: 20.5 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

My brain gears are spinning
I can't even speak
I don't hear voices
Genetic tendency to be a gear head
No I don't think
Kris has a weird cough
I feel burned by the Radio Shopping Show
How can you get burned by them?
They stuck it to me
No
The hotel we got for $100+ a night
Turns out I can get it on Expedia for $63 a night
Oh, baby
Was it an Expedia deal?
You can get them that cheap
You end up with a bed mate
Not even the Sybaris
Do they have them other places?
We'll talk Sybaris later
And I found out that . . .
The bathroom is shared
Shared by who?
Everyone on our floor
Convincing yourself the stay will be fabulous
I am letting Jeanie pick the itinerary
Smart move
Betsy line for locals. . .
Get ready for it Jeanie
"My last name is really Shilts. My uncle was Randy Shilts."
Shut up
You'll be using it to try to get dinner reservations
I could use that the Sybaris
Me working at home is driving you crazy
Well we are in to month 16 of it
No I will not be doing yard work
Well, on Monday we should be square on some stuff
We'll have a bit of news

Tags: Shilts San Francisco Moser Hotel Sybaris Jeanie

Season 19 Ep 26: Kick Ass Mustache, Spilled Coffee, Toe Rings

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 10:54:07 -0500

Croncast - 2008-03-28.mp3
Show: #473
Length: 11:17
Size: 7.84 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Shout to Mike Dunn
You are digging yourself a hole Kris
Walking in NYC is not like walking anywhere else on the planet
Like a mommy in the morning?
Putting on deodorant walking down the block
Not one person looked at me sideways
Don't ask him for money
I love New York
I want to live someplace with a goat
They won't let me have a goat in New York
Well, when it poops they would see it
People just might want to eat your goat
It would poop and you would chasing chocolate marbles on the sidewalk
She had toe rings
That was it getting on the plane
The kids keep going ape
I knock her Starbucks down and spill it
I am in row one, so I can get out quick
I really wanted to help this woman
Especially, when the chubby hamster next to you spills your coffee
She says, "Let me clean it up"
She put on her toe rings thinking today would be different
Did you get a toe ring to the face?
Turns out to be Billy Bob Thornton?
No
He was four Billy Bobs
Did you put on deodorant before you got on the plane?
When the person next to you seeks comfort
She starts weeping
I felt like such an asshole
It was not just the coffee it was the culmination of lots of things
We really need to go
And that is it. This is such a short show.
The kids are wired
Spilled Coffee
Kris is sick
Regular shows and show notes Monday.

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here! Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

Tags: New York City toe rings Mike Dunn mustache spilled coffee

Season 19 Ep 6: Hire Kris, Styrofoam Cups, All Caps

Fri, 18 Jan 2008 09:52:39 -0600

Croncast - 2008-01-18.mp3
Show: #452
Length: 28:19
Size: 19.5mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

View Kris's resume or download it

You wanted more than Wheel of Fortune?
Now you got it
Sure you want it
How to tickle a nerd?
Let us see funny stuff in our stats
From Google searches
Yeah I look for the search term
You know that your IT people got their space
They all need a little space
Evidently we are more exciting than a blue haired lot lizard
Those I dig, they were funny
I'm glad you are getting tickled
Not those industries
If I could reach a lower point in my wife's eyes . . . don't know what it is
Things couldn't be going much worse for me
Instead of life preservers I'm getting styrofoam cups
I am smiling and laughing because I know you are on cusp of something terrrible
Monday was going to awesome
Back story
Interviewing and meeting with people
Turns out they didn't want me for the job that I had applied for
We really want you
What do you want to do?
What would you want me to do if I worked here?
What does my resume say to you?
In all honesty, I haven't read it
Nice
So they loved me
For the last two months we'll get back to you
We are figuring this out
We know how to make it happen
When job hunting you are in a hurry but no one else is
The key is to not come off desperate
I asked what the culture was like
Sure I ended up over dressed
I'm applying for every job that I can
Everything and anything
Manager at Caribou Coffee, you bet
Come Monday most likely we'll be selling the Maguar
We've learned a lot over the last two years
Kris explains how his job ended
Next time all the other cats get gone
We did the best thing we could do at the time
If I would have waited three weeks I might not have had a job
We thought being proactive would be better
Betsy is keeping us afloat in food and small bills with china sales
The eBay sales have been
Listen, it even gets worse
I am fucking everything up
It's me
I'm not doing it on purpose
But it is surely me
Betsy runs her business like a busy mommy
So she gets an all caps email
Directed at the software that she sold for me
It's not my fault he doesn't get it
Oh, my God I am going to kill Kris
For this software, you have to be a nerd!!!!
If you aren't you won't even know what this software is
Not just a nerd but an audio nerd to know what Yellow Tools is
Yeah, I went after him
Not my fault he typed in all caps
Reaching pretty low lows
Wasn't listening to the Wheel shows better?
Man, this is depressing
Got a line on a gig?

Tags: styrofoam google searches low lows Wheel of Fortune interviewing

Season 19 Ep 3: Wheel of Fortune, Mailmen, Mrs. Coach

Fri, 11 Jan 2008 08:56:44 -0600

Croncast - 2008-01-11.mp3
Show: #449
Length: 28:23
Size: 19.5mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Leave us a comment anytime
After reading the comments I am starting to feel sad
Kris, don't feel sad . . . you'll change your mind
Real reasons
We just do it, it's become part of our day
We've become part of that
It's like a radio station
And they are playing Rod Stewart
What? Kris you have lost your mind
Would you rather I say Nazareth "Hair of the Dog"?
What are you talking about?
You should pre-screen your thoughts
Like a celebrity does
Wive's would love these things
Coming back from the long break
Saying things as opposed to telling stories
It was your birthday it made for a weird show
I have to go to the bank
I noticed you didn't buy your own cake
Yes, I needed to step it up and buy one
The bank was a ruse
Turns out the cake was frozen
Much like you
I couldn't really cut it
I told the kids it was an ice cream cake
I forgot to buy candles
Yeah, you made me blow out a lighter
It wasn't just a Bic
This is why being married to you is difficult
You should just say what I think
Kris starts telling Elliot about the lighter
All I can think is shut up, idiot
He doesn't need to know that stuff
I thought about the house burning down
You gotta pull the thing back and click
Mr B. I am so worried about the Wheel of Fortune audition
What am I going to wear?
What am I going to do with my hair?
I think you are projecting a bit
I am going to start combing my eyebrows over my forehead
I hit 33 and my eyebrows are out of control
Big eyebrows are creepy
I didn't say mono-brow
You think the producers are looking for middle America
A mom with pizzaz
I'm not sure I buy that
Maybe you should watch the show
Men wear suits . . . the same on that they wear to funerals and weddings
All the women wear pins
That reminds me of the coach story when you were helping Andy shop
Leave it up to your mom
She'll just buy it off QVC for you
The UPS man, the mail man and the garbage man all have our numbers
QVC delivered twice a day around here
The mail man knows everything that goes on in your life
She's got QVC on the tv and the laptop
The guy from the Queer Eye show is on, she yells
We wake up every Wednesday morning to breaking glass
The garbage man hates us
The QVC bags all end up scattered around the cul de sac
When I was a kid we got the neighbors mail for a week
I knew that he wasn't paying his bills
Water is a luxury
He spent all of his money on Jaguars and software
Baby, you got unfinished projects everywhere
It's typically the man
Feigning the CWI to watch prison shows
It was a very serious sledding injury
I can wear chest pads
Keeping up with the IRS
Just one of those things
Monday you be blinded by my bespangled sweater and snow man pin
I need to seem charming and wholesome
Don't tell them about the podcast
I already did
Well then you need to be yourself
Jeanie said I won't be funny in a pant suit
I disagree you would look very funny in a pant suit

Tags: Nazareth QVC Rod Stuart Wheel of Fortune Mrs. Coach

We're Back. Yes we are. Part 2

Mon, 07 Jan 2008 17:53:32 -0600

We're back with what we are calling 'Season 4'. It's completely arbitrary since we have never had another 'season'. They've all been Croncast!

For those of you that have listened to today's show or read the show notes, the following won't be a surprise - Betsy and I have made the decision that we will be ending Croncast when we hit the 500 show mark in a few months. The 500th Croncast will happen sometime in late April or early May.

Don't be sad! That is 50 more shows. More than most podcasters ever produce.

For the last two weeks we have been discussing our options with the show format and frequency and it seemed to make sense to us to move forward the same way that we have for the last few years. This way the chemistry stays intact and at the end of the run we've got a cohesive library of work.

So for the next few months we'll be here like clockwork every Monday, Wednesday and Friday like usual but once we hit 500 the lights will go dark on Croncast as we know it.

Our goal is to make the next fifty shows some of the best that we've ever done. We don't want to fade away or end on a sour note. We want it to be the the same Croncast that we all enjoy, you and us.

What's next?

Starting Saturday, January 19th we will begin releasing The Resale Queen Podcast. Each week the show will focus on a couple of topics that make Betsy's resale world go round and how they might help anybody with a resale gene become a better junker or clean that newest find for sale on eBay.

I'll be co-hosting with Betsy and acting as her manager. Somebody's got to make sure she records a show each week!

We'd like to thank you for supporting us, listening to the shows and making us a part of your lives. Cheers!

Tags: resale Croncast Resale Queen podcast

A daily Hulu dance

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 14:00:19 -0600

Monday through Friday I will be doing a little dance around here posting a TV show or movie from Hulu until it wears me out.

Today's selection is from The Simpsons season 19, episode 5, Treehouse of Horror XVIII.

BTW, yes I am enamored with Hulu right now. So bear with me.

Tags: The Simpsons Season 19 Hulu dance Simpsons video Hulu video

Raise your Google PR, add 'nofollow' to affiliate links

Wed, 21 Nov 2007 09:59:56 -0600

For the last six weeks I have paid the price for forgetting to upload updated scripts that had the "nofollow" attribute added to text links. By not getting this done when I wanted I suffered the wrath of Google's PR (page rank) drops for those with "paid" text links.

Though, mine weren't paid, they are a home grown system that I wrote for the eBay affiliate program. Turns out the Google algorithm never asked if I was being paid for those links. Stupid robots.

The impact has been that our Google search referrals went down by over half!

This cut my average monthly take from Adsense and the eBay affiliate program to less than $200 combined. Barely enough to cover my server and not enough from Adsense to even get a payout last month. Bluh.

Since Monday I have been watching search referrals steadily climb and our Adsense and eBay money generation increase accordingly.

My recommendation to anyone that currently relies on search traffic to make some loot add rel="nofollow" to all of your text links that might be interpreted as paid.

And if you are using a text link ad company, ask them if they are using it. If not, make your own affiliate links and blaze a DIY trail that Google won't punish you for.

Tags: Adsense eBay affiliate eBay developer Google PR text links

Betsy and her husband Kris Nov 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 09:12:30 -0600

Croncast - 2007-11-12.mp3
Show: #432
Length: 29:27
Size: 20.2mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Monday is a great day to start the week
Yes, I forgot to tell you
The first time that I get to do a birthday show
I guess I am going to Goodwill
It's cool to swear it off
You should take up cardigans and turtle necks
When guys my age are geezers
We will be rocking the grunge look at the convelescent home
I was watching TV on something that is no longer around the house
There was a moment of clarity
I was watching an animal show
There was bear running in slow motion
Beautful
And the narrator pops in "This was the point when Charlie was ready to attack."
Does the bear know that his name is Charlie
It's all about relating to the world around us
We do what is comfortable
We would break the glass bottom boat weight limit
We'll be living fat for the next few months
Ok, hush you have to let me speak Mr. B
The fabulousity of puffy cuffedness
You know the job thing didn't work out
You're taking a moment to rest
And I am looking at the TV
It isn't that big
Spending that much on a TV
I can get you one tomorrow at Goodwill for $50
Yeah, it might weigh 650 pounds
Take your old Chicago technology with you
So I called Costco and told them about the broken ass TV
I just want my number tattooed on me
Betsy, you just like the exclusivity
Having to flash your card
Being a Costco member, stand back bitches
Yeah, as we stand next to the coffins
42 inches is not the big
I'm not going to go there, Kris
We roll in with two crabby kids
He's talking about throwing dead animals in the coffin
Which one do you like mommy?
I just need to find someone to throw in there
He is your child, Betsy
So they start helping us out
Everyone is watching
Fuck bling and diamonds
Roll around with a big screen TV
I had a pack of men following me
Asking me 30 questions
Ahhh, we can't take that back
Why?
You have everything but the manual
You can't take it back without the manual?
Nope
Are you kidding me?
Every time I walked by it
How the fuck did I get here?
I bet you have that thought a lot
Betsy starts rolling on them
It's your birthday, I am going to let you speak
Baby, he was still eying us up
Was he going to tackle us?
Stop them - they are going to buy oranges and pampers
Best friends
I would be a complete asshole if I got another TV right now
I didn't consult for 11 months
I need my business up and running right now . . . takes time
Same thing with jobs . . . takes time
A big day is talking to three recruiters
Betsy's denial policy
Thanks to Karen Vitale for the Franklin Mint vault check

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: Vizio Costco Goodwill named bears denial policy

taking on 33 like a champ - via twitter

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 09:05:08 -0600

and so it was. across this land on monday nov 12, 2007, it is celebrated - my de-wombing.

Tags: kris smith year older

Stepping out of Room 214 into the hallway

Tue, 23 Oct 2007 09:49:34 -0500

In January of this year I took the position, VP, New Media with Room 214, an internet and search engine marketing company. I brought with me Castlock, the podcasting and rss metrics platform that I developed in early 2006.

This was an exciting opportunity. I had built a solid relationship with the founders of the company over the previous year working closely with them to produce podcasting and new media campaigns for the Alltel Racing podcast (NASCAR driver Ryan Newman), four podcasts for NFL Pro Bowl players during 2006 season and many other client podcasts; all the while holding a position as Associate Director, e-Learning for another company. Many of you might remember us talking about this last January.

The last ten months working for Room 214 have been great, but the time has come for all of us to move on.

What will I do now?

I'm not sure. But I do have quite a few options . . . probably more than I realize. There are a couple that leading the pack right now.

My first option is to make sure my resume is up to the task of assisting me gain new full-time employment. It is pretty amazing how over the last three years podcasting and rss have transitioned to "new media" and are being welcomed into the corporate structure. All that bickering about every company being a media company seems to be coming true!

My second option is to put more energy into my podcast production company, Palegroove Studios, and get back in the saddle for podcast production, consulting and licensing of Castlock. When I started with Room 214 I put it on the back burner since I was doing the same work as my "day job".

My third option, and least viable as a solution, is to go all out Croncast. I would love nothing more than to be doing the show full time and bring video into the mix but this doesn't seem to be the right time.

That's it, that is what's been up around here.

Like any time of transition this is an interesting and exciting time. I am already wondering which path I will end up going down and where the choice(s) that I make will lead my family next.

If you've got any thoughts send them to me from the contact page, email kris[at]croncast.com or send them the old fashioned way and give me a call on my GrandCentral line (thanks Rick!) at 630.445.1719.

Update: I should have added this the first time around (it was in the show notes from Monday!)

Feel freed to check out my Linkedin Profile

Tags: Kris Smith Room 214 VP, New Media Palegroove Castlock

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 22, 2007

Mon, 22 Oct 2007 09:26:10 -0500
Croncast - 2007-10-22.mp3
Show: #423
Length: 39:33
Size: 27.1mb
Format: mp3
Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 22, 2007

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Today's show is pretty long for us, an extra 10 minutes
Lots going on in our lives (see banner graphic for this post above)
Kris knows all of Betsy's passwords
Of course I never gave access to my accounts
Betsy feels ripped off this week
I happened across a subdivision sale
Sure I had been there twice already
I needed to stop after getting my Morrisey dinner theater money
Oh, baby. I am really asleep
How did you get tricked out of your money?
I ended up with two broken strollers
I'll never be had like that again
Three houses down it happened again
Auto sound effects just don't work in a car
A motorized baby stroller?
Yeah, that was great idea
Swing-a-meal, the baby eats while it is swinging
Just take a hot and hollow it out for straw
Meaty milk, mmmmmmmm, yummy
Here we go
Life is show prep
Last Monday and Wednesday there were no shows
Well, here's the reason
I am now a free agent
Yep, I am back to podcast consulting and production
But I am good to go if you got an open gig
For now, check out my Linkedin Profile

Resume soon
I thought we were beyond this resume stuff
I sent my resume to a professional resume writer
Betsy reads what they see as wrong with my resume
Key - don't throw the reader for a loop
Here comes a Kris analogy
Yes, Kris . . . living life with you is like riding a bike down a staircase
My glasses are eating my face

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: Kris Smith Linkedin Morrissey Morrissey dinner theater riding a bike