neighbor | Croncast - Life is Show Prep

One Man Wet T-Shirt Contest, Cellowrap, Spaniel Stacking

Mon, 21 Jun 2010 14:25:56 -0500

Episode: #642
Length: 27:33
Format: mp3

To listen to this and all new Croncast episodes Get Cool!

I won a contest
It was a one man wet t-shirt contest
Parading around Manhattan
It happened to me too, Kris
That is a sad story
Maggers' melting
They just don't know when to quit
Father's Day surprises
Waking up and knowing everything
That would be awesome
Brittany Spaniel breeding in the city
You can't just let them hump with kids watching
Seems to be a practice of hating neighbor
Oh! And if you use the Twitters, check out Ville - http://ville.ag

Tags: cellowrap wet tshirt underwater lesbian ffa one man

Season 25 Episode 17: The Croncast Shorty

Mon, 21 Jun 2010 14:19:27 -0500

Episode: #642 The Croncast Shorty
Length: 4:55
Format: mp3

To listen to this and all new Croncast episodes in full Get Cool!

Tags: cellowrap wet tshirt underwater lesbian ffa one man

Daddy Justice, Aluminum Lined, Long Memory

Mon, 01 Feb 2010 18:06:28 -0600

Show: #544
Length: 28:09
Format: mp3

To listen to this and all new Croncast episodes Get Cool!

Hey hey
Thos comments are gonna flow
Yes, i've had hamsters before
This would be a fourth
Well, it is a fourth
How did you have four hamsters?
What happened to them?
Kris tells a story that should never be told
I don't want to go into all of the things I learned in La Moille
You set me up for a lifetime of chores
I didn't walk away
I'm still here
No matter how much like a midget New Yorker and it's cute it won't work
As it is we can't have the landlord in to fix anything
Just don't tell Mommy
Daddy's buying me a hamster
You have no idea
I do know
Feral hamsters don't count, Kris
Glow in the dark ball back in the day
Pets didn't last me all that long
I tried to cram it down the Sesame Street slide
No it didn't die
Does you mom still have that?
It ain't a rabbits foot, it's a hamster foot
Look, is was common at that time
Aluminum foil on the bottom
What?
That is what they said to do
Who?
The people at the pet store
<-- sampler show ends -->
That is the way it was done
Was it like 1840 Louisiana?
It didn't do him any good
Just like you didn't end up with straight arms
The way that it is
If he's smart he won't eat it
Was your crib lined with foil?
He decided to do himself in
Brittle plastic bottom
It was a bird cage
I can't even look at you
Why did he die? I don't know
I highly doubt you had a hamster
It was really a dead parakeet
This is my friend Pete
No wonder the neighbor kids never played with me
Oh my god, that is dumb!
Maybe it got bird food
I lived in a blissful bubble till I met you
Oh, baby
Dylan's Candy Bar is worth the trip to NYC with kids
Maybe I shouldn't have done it
She will never forgive me
She's got a great memory
Don't go buy a hamster
Oh! And if you use the Twitters, check out Ville - http://ville.ag

Tags: hamster pet store dylan's candy bar new york la moille

Season 22 Ep 07: Betsy's Clairvoyant, You're Grounded, Gameshow Desires

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 12:20:41 -0500

Croncast - 2009-06-16.mp3
Show: #533
Length: 25:51
Size: 23.8 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

What you don't have is the funny
I'm bringing it to over 40 people Thursday nights
All in the old Seinfeld time slot
What are you up against?
Oh, yeah . . . ER reruns
They used to stay home for Greys Anatomy
Not so hot early on
Doing the shows for your cousins
12 people versus 50 and percentage laughing
Well, I can see you telling a joke in a restroom
All about pumping your ego up
Two fangirls waiting for me
Thinking they can't find the bathroom
"Oh, my god. You were so funny."
Bitsy's door star - they can't speel
The bicycle issue
There is no issue . . . I am the BMX'n boy
Kris, I couldn't ride a bike until I was 10
That is the plan the man is on
He got my physical genes
My neighbors got rich of off my physical ineptitude
I learned to ride in the grass
Of course you did softy
I saw a malleable four year old girl in front of me
She wanted to go fast
Daddy, go get the tool box
She takes the wrench from me
Takes the training wheels herself
Took 2 minutes to get her going
Then 20 to get her starting off on her own
Loving it for the freedom
Number one for her was freedom
The second is that Elliot can't ride a bike
She pointed it out, Not me
A stranger isn't going the pick the nutty kid
The other was her fear of punishment
She tried to give up
I motivated her
She got so upset that she just did it
All kids are different and need different motivational techniques
Just a wee bit of manipulation
One teaspoon of manipulation and one of sweat
You gotta throw in some love
You know that I am clairvoyant Mr B
Baby, you can't tell people that
That is just too much
Walking to school in a Marlboro Jacket
They had a denim one that I wanted
You could deduce that knowing my history
Betsy is ready to restart her career as a game show contestant
When you hit the track you become a robot
I'll be back later, I got ponies to read up on

Tags: Seinfeld bmx game show ponies fangirl

Season 20 Ep 24: Cousin Kris, Painters Cap, Nothing Is Level

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:28:11 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-16.mp3
Show: #499
Length: 22:52
Size: 15.7mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Keep the Archive Alive goes on
$25 of support gets you 2 DVD's with the full archive mailed to your door
Drop that Archive Support at the site in any one of the banners
It is all about the Interwaves
The photo montage of the father's day trip are up
Look in the blog for the story
Soften up the crow's feet
Geez, that bag, what is she 33?
I don't know if Rock of Love is comparative to competitive improv dinner theater
The afternoon jamboree
Much like licking a toilet
"Cousin Kris!"
The first Casey's we stop at
Hey, I know you
No, I didn't know her name instantly
Hoping for it fire into my brain
Turns out to be cousin X
She's of the normal branch
But the odds of that
Not that great
Running into someone buying smokes
I just don't want to get there
I know, Betsy, you were driving 45 in a 75
Never thought we would make it
Creeping ever closer that sucking vortex where you grew up
It is an area of decay
Dilapidated nothingness
If you were a pizza deliver guy you would deliver to houses with siding
The rest are wrapped in Tyvek
It looks like depression
We tried the town route
Elliot is asking why it is abandoned
Yelling why doesn't it look like home
Two taglines
"For Rent"
"Rent to Own"
You wouldn't let me take the best photo
It was the award winning shot
It was beautiful
The transient neighbor
In a wife beater, smoking a cigarrete, talking on his phone in a NASCAR painters cap
And . . . And . . . his white wolf dog on the steps
Nothing is level there
I fell down 77 times
Growing oriental poppies
Couldn't believe it
Save me from this
And you walked away
Everyone walked away to leave me there
The scary compound
The old ass car wasn't as bad
Always had the perspective that there was someplace else I needed to be

Tags: white wolf chevrolet graveyard interwaves abandoned small town

busted half of'em

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 21:31:15 -0500

baseballs, rocks, jarts or slamming them, i broke half of our neighbors carriage house windows growing up. they look pretty good now.

Tags: half house carriage windows growing

white wolf? bitchin dog

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 21:22:55 -0500

the newest of transient neighbors across from my folks are the proud owners of this canine.

my guess is that its name is snow or blow.

Tags: canine owners proud guess name

Season 20 Ep 15: Dumpster Golf, Penny Drop, Fancy Hood

Mon, 12 May 2008 13:54:32 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-12.mp3
Show: #490
Length: 19.6
Size: 28:32 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Betsy likes the amens to her sermons
Now they can tell me to mow my lawn
We are way more boring than the show
The picture in her head of you was repulsive
Good thing she didn't see a real picture
I despise this time of year the most
Why?
The grass grows
I hate the mowing
Pulling back that shade for bits of sunlights
I am the Boo Radley of the neighborhood
I have been honing my skills without you
Something new to the Resale Queen toolbox
Not the Billy Squire stroke
A body bag full of bubble wrap
A body bag?
I tried to do a Penny Drop
That was for those of you that too kindergarten gymnastics
Tetanus shot for junking license
I had to have the bubble wrap
So I went to Goodwill
Fast like a bunny
I bought a Titleist
Golf club
We playing gold today mommy?
Yes, Maggie, dumpster golf
Your Titleist for dumpster diving
Your like a gorilla in the mist
Your people were the strain that hung on the jungle floor
Mine were smarter and more motivated
Now, I bring home the bananas
It's all about who brings home the bacon
I am forever grateful that you make enough for me to dig in a dumpster
We found your wife, sir.
Behind what store?
It could be worse, I could be a scrap booker
It is a services
I'm not going to mess with these women
They are serious
Treating things better
Betsy flattens a tire on my car
I'm driving slow on your rim
You were right next to the car dealership
Why didn't you just go there?
You used to recruit truck drivers, you talk to him
Sorry to be so vaginal
I just gave up
Why is he trying to change the tire?
Does he know how to change a tire?
Yeah, that's a lot of money for a fancy hood
They say that to a lot of women who get labia surgery too

Tags: Titleist gold club the bacon penny drop gymnastics

more blossoms

Tue, 06 May 2008 13:34:12 -0500

the neighbor's tree is in full effect today. it smells great too.

Tags: smells effect tree neighbor blossoms

best leg warmers in san francisco

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 20:35:00 -0500

just met michelle here in sf. she was denny hastert's neighbor.

Tags: leg warmers denny hastert neighbor michelle lupie yorkville

Croncast Listener Survey Results Continued

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 18:27:16 -0500

The results continued. These were the likes and dislikes of fellow listeners.

What Listeners Like
Date	Comment
01/30/2008	Its hilarious attitude
01/10/2008	The way they talk about their lives, it is hilarious and endearing all at once.
01/07/2008	The chemistry between Kris and Betsy and the humor.
01/02/2008	Betsy and Chris are funny and real people.
12/31/2007	Very funny.
12/29/2007	real
12/28/2007	They are ""My People""
12/26/2007	Betsy & Kris are great together! The fact that they talk about ""nothing"" & can create a funny show out of it reminds be of Seinfeld. You guys ROCK!!Keep it up.
12/20/2007	The humor. They are normal people who actually like and support each other.
11/02/2007	Host are very entertaining
10/29/2007	Betsy!
10/23/2007	The hosts are great, its real life only funny
10/23/2007	Extremely funny
10/22/2007	it's hilarious!
10/22/2007	I like the hosts personally.
10/18/2007	This is the funniest podcast out there. I feel like they are my friends.
10/11/2007	they are so fucking funny!
10/04/2007	It is constantly entertaining, my favorite podcast out there.
10/03/2007	great banter between hosts
10/03/2007	Betsy and Kris do a wonderful job of airing out their lives on the air in a way that is real, funny, and sometimes even JUST A Little bit uncomfortable. Their lucky they got all that expensive equipment between them while their doing the show. In the future I see bullet proof glass..... LOL Just kidding. The show length is perfect, spot on, no waste on predetermined montages or business or reader mail or anything that's just filler to try and get a longer show. about 30 minutes or less is PERFECT. They're both Hilarious (a little respect for the Bear).
09/13/2007	I love the energy between the hosts
09/10/2007	they make me laugh out loud! and i can relate to them.
09/07/2007	lively realism
09/07/2007	the ""humaness"" of it
09/05/2007	Funny!!!
09/05/2007	Kris's laugh
09/04/2007	hilarious!!! Love Betsey and Chris, they are so funny and personable
09/04/2007	Kris and Betsy make me laugh out loud all the time.
08/29/2007	The interaction between Kris and Betsy
08/29/2007	The fact that I feel like I'm in a similar boat. Former cool guy/punk rocker turned daddy dearest.
08/29/2007	Betsy and Kris are so funny and entertaining.
08/29/2007	The real world approach to podcasting.
08/27/2007	betsy and kris
08/26/2007	Kris and Betsy are PRICELESS!!! I enjoy everything about this podcast. They are parents just like my husband and I and I can really relate to most of what they talk about. Keep it up!
08/22/2007	Honest, funny, and always entertaining.
08/06/2007	Betsy and Kris are hilarious. It's just a fun part of my week to listen to them.
08/03/2007	funny entertaining,
07/30/2007	The hosts are very entertaining.
07/29/2007	the humor. the hosts don't take themselves too seriously.
07/11/2007	The way Kris and Betsy interact.
07/10/2007	the hosts
07/09/2007	The humorous banter between the hosts. Hilarious!
07/09/2007	Great personalities, good audio quality, consistent and reliable.
07/06/2007	Betsy Smith
06/29/2007	They're a couple like me and my wife. Living vicariously through them, at times
06/19/2007	You guys are FUNNY! These questions are funny - I especially like the one that asks how much confidence we have in your ability to select cars... ;)
06/19/2007	The funny Hosts. Betsy is great.
06/16/2007	It's funny most of the time.
06/15/2007	The hosts
06/14/2007	Hilarious!

06/13/2007	FUN!
06/10/2007	They are funny and witty. Its a perfect combination of ornery and nice!
06/09/2007	I like everything about it. No special part. All of it. Takes me back to my young parent days!
06/08/2007	We(wife & I) and the podcast team are at the about the same place in life. I relate to what they normally talk about.
05/27/2007	Betsy! The real-life stories are extremely entertaining.
05/26/2007	I truly appreciate how Kris and Betsy allow me to share their lives. At times, Betsy make the mundane so hilarious that I've had to pull the car over. Thanks guys.
05/25/2007	Rapport of the hosts. Great conversational quality.
05/15/2007	Great back and forth banter between hosts. They are realistic, funny,and honest. Show reminds me of Seinfeld in that it's a show about nothing in particular just the quirks of life. I can relate with both of the hosts humor, and to Betsy's addiction to thrift stores. When Mr. B laughs really hard it's so funny!
05/13/2007	it's funny and charming to hear two people that like each other and are able to joke about each other.
05/13/2007	cool people
05/11/2007	The honesty of the hosts.
05/09/2007	Genuine Humor & the way the hosts mesh with each other
05/02/2007	Both Kris and Betsy. Their personalities complement each other perfectly. The interaction between them comes off as very ""Real"", They turn the mundane into entertainment consistantly. After all....life is show prep.
05/01/2007	Fantastic humor
04/30/2007	Chemistry between co-hosts and commentary on real-life events.
04/29/2007	It is entertaining and fun.
04/29/2007	Kris & Betsy sound authentic
04/28/2007	the day to day life of betsy
04/21/2007	The everday humor.
04/21/2007	Two people, funny
04/15/2007	The funny banter!
04/12/2007	They are the most ""real"" married couple on the planet -- absolute pure honesty and openness.
04/09/2007	The comedy aspect
04/05/2007	Chris and Betsy are very funny and creative folks.
04/02/2007	excellent humor, friendly hosts, good storytelling
03/23/2007	Croncast was a charming podcast in the early days; it becomes more difficult to listen to as Chris' ego expands. Betsy remains a joy to listen to.
03/13/2007	It's funny!
03/12/2007	The Hosts
03/07/2007	Hosts and everyday conversation that keeps me laughing.
03/07/2007	The interaction between the co-hosts and great story-telling.
03/07/2007	The hosts
03/04/2007	I have been listening since January of 2005 and I am totally hooked! Chris and Betsy are extremely funny and entertaining. When you listen to them, it is like having a conversation with your friends. I listen on my iPOD at work and I am constantly laughing out loud. The sound quality is excellent! It is definitely professional sounding. I took this for granted until I subscribed to other podcasts with poor sound (and ended up unsubcribing to them). Keep up the good work!
03/03/2007	FUNNY! (and real)
03/01/2007	Honest conversation
03/01/2007	They're my age and I can relate to the things they talk about. They make me laugh.
03/01/2007	Their relationship and how they both make me laugh: one by her stories and the other by his laugh! They are wonderful people and they have made me feel like one of the family.
03/01/2007	the hosts, content and audio quality
02/28/2007	very entertaining and fun
02/28/2007	They are just fun to listen to. Betsy is funny and so is Chris. I look forward to each episode.
02/27/2007	the hosts! The natural way they interact with each other and the hilarious things that come out of their mouths.
02/27/2007	The hosts are very funny. It reminds ne of sitting with friends in a social situation and discussing and making fun of various topics.
02/27/2007	Relationship between hosts
02/27/2007	It's fun to listen to... What else could there be?
02/26/2007	I like this podcast because I like to listen to people with lots of problems.
02/26/2007	It's funny. It's about every day life as a married couple and as a family. They pay attention to listener's feedback.
02/26/2007	Betsy
02/26/2007	Funny, good storytelling, reality based
02/26/2007	Hosts/content/Reliability
02/26/2007	I love the hosts - Kris and Betsy. They are very transparent and real and completely fun to listen to. They make the basic stuff of life hilarious.
02/26/2007	The interaction between the hosts. The stories about everyday life.

02/25/2007	The interaction between Kris & Betsy and their good outlook on life.
02/25/2007	lively, animated banter
02/25/2007	I just can't quit them.
02/24/2007	it is human and it is funny
02/24/2007	Good off-the-cuff humor.
02/24/2007	Kris and Betsy make me laugh and are just generally likable.
02/24/2007	Down to earth naature of the hosts, humor, excellent story-telling
02/24/2007	I'm an American living abroad and I listen to this religiously ... not for news, just to hear what everyday folks are up to. It's funny and interesting. This podcast rocks. Betsy and Kris are the greatest.
02/24/2007	Exceptionally engaging, funny hosts, warmth, interesting content, very high production values.
02/23/2007	the hosts
02/23/2007	Always funny and interesting
02/23/2007	Chris and Betsy are funny. It is very entertaining.
02/23/2007	Funny and comfortable
02/23/2007	the humor and interactions between the hosts
02/23/2007	I look forward to listening each week because Kris and Betsy are so entertaining. There is NO other podcast out there that gets me laughing the way they do.
02/23/2007	They are hilarious and personable. They amke you feel like you're listening to friends. But funny friends.
02/23/2007	this is the most awesome podcast that I listen to, Betsy and Chris are the best and incredibly funny. There shows are always entertaining, no if ands or buts
02/23/2007	I have no idea. It is infectuous though. They are good together.
02/23/2007	Rapport between Kris and Betsy. Overlap between my areas of interest and life issues and theirs. General witty and clever and funny outlook on life, even when it sucks.
02/23/2007	Chemistry of the hosts.
02/22/2007	they are just like us...but my goatee is shorter and i have hair on my head
02/22/2007	laid back, down to earth, Not a big production, can relate with hosts
02/22/2007	Kris and Betsy are extremely funny, down to earth, real.
02/22/2007	I really enjoy Kris and Betsy. I love their relationship and their interaction. They're very funny.
02/22/2007	Betsy is funny as shit... Kris is like robin to her batman
02/22/2007	Rapport between hosts.
02/22/2007	The ability of the Host's to play off of each other's humor. Play arguments.
02/22/2007	I really enjoy the fun the hosts have with each other. The closeness of their relationship comes through in each show.
02/21/2007	The hosts are great! Open, honest, funny and real. This is one of the five best podcasts in the known world!
02/21/2007	Nice mix of humor and serious topics. Nice banter between the hosts.
02/21/2007	Consistently entertaining
02/21/2007	They make me laugh everytime, in the way that my friends make me laugh...they are great fun and as a married person i highly identfy with some of the stuff they talk about.
02/21/2007	No ads. It is honest people talking, it doesn't have a staged quality to it.
02/21/2007	Hearing a married couple deal with similar issues that other 30-something couples face, but in thier own unique way.
02/21/2007	It is extremely funny and entertaining.
02/21/2007	the hosts
02/21/2007	Real people. Real situations. Funny as all get out.
02/21/2007	Kris
02/21/2007	the hosts
02/21/2007	Kris and Betsy are really funny and could be my next door neighbor except better.
02/21/2007	Life the Smith way!
02/21/2007	Lively private conversation between married folk
02/21/2007	I LOVE BETSY and Kris :)
02/21/2007	The dynamics of Kris & Betsy. They just have interesting conversations.
02/21/2007	The hosts are one of a kind. My wife and I can really relate to them. They are very enjoyable to listen to. I can't count the number of times I have laughed out loud while listening. They should get paid to do what they do.
02/21/2007	It's kinda funny sometimes. You can listen without really paying attention
02/20/2007	It is extremely intelligent and absolutely hilarious...very engaging!
02/20/2007	personalities
02/20/2007	The dynamic between Kris and Betsy is wonderful. Their relationship isn't perfect, but they obviously love each other and that's what makes it great. Plus they are both EXTREMELY funny.
02/20/2007	Content, Hosts,

02/20/2007	The realism. The bickering. Reminds me of my wife and myself. Just bickering sometimes to have something to talk about, pick a fight just to fight and get over it and have fun.
02/20/2007	The chemistry between Kris & Betsy.
02/20/2007	the humor of the hosts
02/20/2007	It's a slice of life that's clever and funny. The hosts have a wonderful rappor with each other and I love how they are able to make you feel like it's all in fun, like no matter what underneath it all they love each other and that's all that really counts.
02/20/2007	Honesty. Hilarity.
02/20/2007	The easy way that the hosts are able to interact with each other. Even when they are slightly ticked off - they will laugh easily and they project their relationship into the podcast. All technical details of the podcast are A+.
02/20/2007	honesty
02/20/2007	The personalities of the hosts.
02/20/2007	the humor. I can relate to them and the way they interact as a couple. I highly enjoy the banter and fun wacky topics.
02/20/2007	the frequency of podcasts, content, humor
02/20/2007	It's hilarious
02/20/2007	Comedy
02/20/2007	Kris & Betsy
02/20/2007	Reel life with real friends.
02/20/2007	Humor & relationship between hosts
02/20/2007	As half of a married couple living in the suburbs of Detroit with two kids, I relate to the content of the podcast. They make me laugh!
02/20/2007	It cheers me up.
02/20/2007	It makes me laugh
02/19/2007	Kris' laugh and Betsy's sense of humor
02/19/2007	The hosts - Betsy and Kris (the side-kick). They just brighten up my day.
02/19/2007	Betsy's ability to put up with her husband's interesting viewpoints.
02/19/2007	It's funny.
02/19/2007	very entertaining
02/19/2007	People involved it's the kind of show that only works with Betsy/ Chris so it's hard to pick anything you can do more of
02/19/2007	I like the banter back and forth between Betsy and Mr B - they argue like my husband and I do. Also, the frequency of the episodes. 3 times a week feeds wonderfully into my attention deficit disorder ;)
02/19/2007	The Hosts
02/19/2007	The chemistry between the hosts is wonderful. Betsy is hilarious. Kris seems like a completely genuine, nice guy. Together, they are entertaining and seem completely ""for real.""
02/19/2007	the great sense of humor and intimacy of the hosts.
02/19/2007	Chemistry between the hosts Quality of editing
02/19/2007	banter between the hosts.
02/19/2007	Kris and Betsy are terrific! Their conversations are the highlight of my week!
02/19/2007	everything
02/19/2007	it's fun to listen to.
02/19/2007	I love the chemistry that Kris and Betsy have. I also love how they can tell interesting stories that are funny as hell.
02/19/2007	funny, real life experiences oh, did I mentioned funny
02/19/2007	The hosts
02/19/2007	Tone and sense of humor exhibited by hosts!
02/19/2007	Betsy and Kris arguing
02/19/2007	Betsy, Betsy, and Betsy
02/19/2007	The hosts
02/19/2007	Life is show prep. they have very a similar lifestyle to us. They're local
02/19/2007	Hearing real stories about the everyday life of the hosts.
02/19/2007	The hosts are entertaining and work great together. I know when I listen to this podcast I will be entertained.
02/19/2007	Listening is like having a conversation with friends
02/19/2007	Various well told extremely funny stories, the consistency of new episodes, good quality.
02/19/2007	They are funny, real, and are a great couple

What Listeners Don't Like
01/30/2008	Nothing
01/10/2008	That they're stopping! Please, do something!
01/02/2008	I wish they were making big money from the podcast.
12/31/2007	When it's not on.
12/29/2007	the hosts are hostile to each other sometimes and the man laughs at nothing
12/28/2007	format changes but since the hosts have a real life I understand the necessity.
12/26/2007	The intro & outgo.
12/20/2007	They think we only want to hear about the good times. We want to hear about the trials, too.
11/02/2007	I like everything
10/29/2007	The way Betsy disses Kris' family. I mean come on...
10/23/2007	Occasional liberal/Democratic skew.
10/22/2007	nothing
10/22/2007	No complaints.
10/18/2007	There is nothing I don't like about it. I guess only that they are not getting rich doing it because they deserve it.
10/11/2007	kris's laugh
10/04/2007	Sometimes it is too short, I wish they had hour long podcasts.
10/03/2007	no reader from webpage?
10/03/2007	I can never catch up it seems always 2 or 3 behind.
09/13/2007	nothing
09/10/2007	that they aren't on everyday!!
09/07/2007	should be daily
09/07/2007	no video associated with it
09/05/2007	nothin'
09/04/2007	Just that I'm SO far behind in listening to episodes! (About 2 weeks behind)
08/29/2007	Sometimes it's too short
08/29/2007	It's too short!
08/29/2007	The sound of running water. It makes me have to pee.
08/27/2007	its too short sometimes but i guess kris and betsy can have a life
08/26/2007	Not one thing!
08/22/2007	Doesn't come out often enough!
08/03/2007	sometimes shows are not long enough, granted, they don't make a living off this!
07/30/2007	That they only put out a show 3 times a week.
07/11/2007	The episodes are over too quickly!
07/10/2007	i like it all, no complaints
07/06/2007	Kris Smith. He simply doesn't get how life works.
06/19/2007	Nothing comes to mind about the show. I do have a suggestion for you though - how about doing an idiot's guide to RSS feeds on the show? I haven't monkeyed around enough to get the episodes to download to my pc automatically so I can move them to my phone's memory card. I think that's what RSS is for, but I haven't had the time to mess around with it to figure it out. I know Kris knows how to do it - why not do a 5-minute tutorial on the show about how to do it? -Jennifer in San Diego (your alter ego, Dave's, wife)
06/19/2007	Life is sometimes a little boring....
06/16/2007	The new intro music.
06/15/2007	Nothing
06/10/2007	can't think of a thing
06/09/2007	There is nothing about it I don't like. Keep up the great work.
06/08/2007	They interupt each other during stories and go off on tangents, and sometimes forget to finish the original story.
05/27/2007	I have very little that I dislike about the show.
05/26/2007	I would not change a thing. I was glad to see the music between segments go.
05/25/2007	That is isn't every day of the week.
05/15/2007	Not much I don't like about the show, but one time they had a guest on, a female family friend who they were trying to find a boyfriend for and she had the worst east coast accent. It wasn't kind on the ears at all, especially for west coast listeners. It sounded like nails on a chalkboard.
05/13/2007	Kris annoys me sometimes. I think he thinks he's funnier than he is.
05/13/2007	sometimes weird edits
05/11/2007	Beginning music, abrupt ending, the bits of music throughout (nice idea, but they don't work).
05/09/2007	Way to much bad language

05/02/2007	Since the return of the show it seems like something is missing. I'm not sure exactly what it is. Also some of the shows seem to be rather short.
04/30/2007	Sometimes a little too much time is spent examining the clammy white underbelly of middle-American life.
04/29/2007	the language makes it difficult to listen to around my kids
04/29/2007	Can't think of anything
04/21/2007	Nothing, I love everything about it.
04/15/2007	The fact that they feel they need to edit themselves for us.
04/12/2007	Nothing.
03/13/2007	The cussing.
03/12/2007	It is too short
03/07/2007	Wish it was more often ;=) I think the website is a bit confusing.
03/07/2007	there's not really anything i don't like.
03/07/2007	nothing
03/04/2007	Not much to dislike. Maybe a show one or two times per week instead of three.
03/03/2007	nothing negative, really
03/01/2007	Episodes too frequent, twice a week would be better. Don't have time for 3 episodes a week
03/01/2007	I've just started listening and I caught a couple episodes where Kris was sick so it was 85etsy and that just didn't work as well. You need the calm of Kris to even out the excitability of Betsy.
03/01/2007	They don't podcast 2x's a day every day forever and ever and ever..duh!
03/01/2007	I can't listen to it around my kids.
02/28/2007	nothing
02/28/2007	not much
02/27/2007	I dont expect everyone to like everything but it bothers me occasionally when Kris gets adamant on how much he dislikes bicyclists or pets.
02/27/2007	Sound of mother-in-law's bath water running in background.
02/27/2007	Unnecessary use of strong language in an otherwise pretty family-friendly show.
02/26/2007	The cussing!!!
02/26/2007	sometimes, not always it can be a bit long.
02/26/2007	Not much to dislike
02/26/2007	Pretty much no complaints.
02/25/2007	The times when I want to scream at them when they're about to do something really stupid with their money again (cf. Slowsky, calculating eBay earnings but ignoring the fees)
02/25/2007	would like more frequent shows
02/25/2007	I just can't quit them.
02/24/2007	The host's sometimes frustrating inability to see how they sabotage themselves in reaching their goals.
02/24/2007	It makes me very uneasy when Kris and Betsy argue.
02/24/2007	Not often enough
02/24/2007	Hosts occasionally talking over each other.
02/23/2007	nada
02/23/2007	I wish it were every day. :)
02/23/2007	nothing...
02/23/2007	I wouldn't change a thing! My only worry is that someday they'll burn out and stop podcasting. :)
02/23/2007	huh... nothing...
02/23/2007	that it isn't everyday.
02/23/2007	The fact that I can't put my finger on why I can't stop listening to it.
02/23/2007	Month-long breaks ;)
02/23/2007	When they have to take time off. Though I understand.
02/22/2007	strange women lying around in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government, supreme executive power comes from a mandate from the masses, not from some farsical aquatic ceremony
02/22/2007	Sometimes they skip around topics alot
02/22/2007	Its not a daily podcast.
02/22/2007	When it ends.
02/21/2007	I just wish there was more, more, more!
02/21/2007	Hosts occasionally step on one another
02/21/2007	wish shows were either more frequent or longer, although wouldn't want to see what happened to nick and jess happen to them...therefore, frequency and length are fine - lol

02/21/2007	that they are taking a break soon!
02/21/2007	The upcoming podcast boycott, er, break they are taking !!!! :(
02/21/2007	Sometimes the hosts do crazy things and I want to jump through my iPod and snap them out of their decision to do something irrational.
02/21/2007	nothing
02/21/2007	That I can't listen more.
02/21/2007	Taking month off.
02/21/2007	John Elway Dodge
02/21/2007	Kris rags on Betsy too much.
02/21/2007	Kris' angry rants. I don't like when he threatens the dog.
02/21/2007	Nothing. Croncast is great. Wait, the podcast name is little too geeky.
02/21/2007	I hate it when Kris builds some big thing up for a future episode, then it turns out he just got a new job.
02/20/2007	There is nothing that I do not like about this podcast.
02/20/2007	nothing
02/20/2007	I have nothing to complain about regarding their podcasts. Never been unsatisfied.
02/20/2007	Too short
02/20/2007	The fact that they're taking a month off. You bastards. I'm just gonna have to argue that much more with my own wife to make up for the lack of you bickering. :P
02/20/2007	Not applicable
02/20/2007	the length and frequency, would love longer shows more often (sorry guys, but I love you and it's true!)
02/20/2007	I guess it's allegience to the glossy surface of popular culture without acknowledging or investigating the bredth of possibility below that surface - but that is just a token issue, I had to think about it to come up with something I didn't like.
02/20/2007	It's not a travelling vaudeville show.
02/20/2007	Sometimes I wish the hosts would seek the help of some financial planning professionals. They could then be more confident in the choices they make - and relate on the podcast.
02/20/2007	making a big deal about something that is boring?
02/20/2007	The fact that there aren't 5 podcasts per week!
02/20/2007	only complaint is that it's not daily!
02/20/2007	There is nothing I don't like about this podcast
02/20/2007	Sometimes Betsy is too mean to Kris!
02/20/2007	Not much...
02/20/2007	A live event would be interesting to hear.
02/20/2007	Swearing / foul language
02/20/2007	Sometimes Kris and Betsy's real life interupts their ability to get shows out. But... that's life.
02/20/2007	sometimes the same topic gets discussed over and over again
02/20/2007	I like everything
02/19/2007	That Kris and Betsy aren't making any money on it! They are hysterical, I would pay for that!
02/19/2007	That Betsy and Kris sound like they are about to give up doing the podcast.
02/19/2007	Chris' political views.
02/19/2007	Not much.
02/19/2007	i wish it were every day
02/19/2007	Same as above, jsut hard to think of what you can do less of
02/19/2007	hmmmmmmmm...I wish each episode was longer? Because I'm greedy like that?
02/19/2007	Nothing
02/19/2007	Nothing! It's fabulous the way it is!
02/19/2007	sometimes repetitive subjects, and episodes just to churn out more episodes even when they don't have too much to say
02/19/2007	swearing
02/19/2007	I wish there was more!
02/19/2007	I really don't have any complaints about this podcast.
02/19/2007	nothing
02/19/2007	the dog
02/19/2007	Very little. I'm not thrilled that the hosts are taking a month off, but I know this is a big time commitment for them.
02/19/2007	Betsy and Kris talking about the dog
02/19/2007	Sometimes the hosts are braindead.

02/19/2007	Nothing
02/19/2007	Would like to have more episodes per week.
02/19/2007	That they are on only 3 times a week. But that is me being selfish.
02/19/2007	Nothing comes to mind.
02/19/2007	Only 3times a week, :)

Tags: Croncast Survey Kris Smith Betsy Smith Advertising Croncast Demographics

Season 20 Ep 7: Koi Pond of Death, Kipp, Horticulture Authority

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 10:01:19 -0500

Croncast - 2008-04-18.mp3
Show: #482
Length: 26:40
Size: 18.3 mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2007 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Kris is all business all the time
I am business baby even when I sleep
You're on Twitter 24/7
I was dreaming about API's
That is why I slept through the earthquake
Why you should be like me
Fifth graders would listen
It is like dreaming about math
What parent wouldn't say, "I would like my kid dreaming about math"
You can't negative criticism
The survey we ran for one year
The likes and dislikes are finally available
It's not that
"He laughs at nothing"
The laugh is used to fill in the gaps
Go back and listen to the first few shows with gaps
No one is addicted to your laugh
I say addicted to laughing in general
It is good for you
Adam Curry released some demographic data
So with that I will release all survey that we did later today
STICKERS - first 10 people to send me their address from the contact page
GET - a sticker
Swearing was a thing we did a lot of
We've gone through iterations
Your mom draining her tub
My options were here or next to the sump pump
The outdoor work began around here
Anything I try to do never works
We know this Betsy
The neighbor's chemically altered grass
The grass is smart it knows not even to cross property line
Raised timber bed
Longtime listeners might remember the coi pond
The koi pond of death
I hire them to clean up the yard, remove some timbers and edge my mulch
People that run their own business have psychological problems
They do it because they can't get a normal job
Anybody can be a landscaper
Kipp's Lawn Repair
Kipp is name of death
Just says drug habit
I ask him for a quote
He's a horticulture authority
You could sell his rotten lumber
ReplacementDeckParts.com
That should be your next business
Green has become a scam in many ways
AAA1 Steve
Are you bonded?
Yes, I've posted bond before
Oh, no
That sort of happened with the Comcast guy
He'd done time
Or as he said, "I did a bit"
He hadn't seen his kids in years
That TV would fit right out that window
I got my eye on them
I don't trust them ever
Betsy is soo like Daniel Day-Louis in There Will Be Blood
Upton Sinclair wrote the book just for you
Would you quit junking for $1 million?
I couldn't do it
That would only last you 3-4 months, Kris
Right, 50ould go to the divorce
Banking where you used to live
You mail stuff to your bank?
Well, it's an hour long drive

Tags: Koi Fish croncast stickers horticulture authority Upton Sinclair Daniel Day-Louis

Which Way Did He Go?

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 19:16:02 -0500

One of the neighbors boxers at the back fence.

You can see where Zeus claws the fence to share kisses with his girlfriends.

Tags: fence share kisses girlfriends claws

Resale Queen Podcast Episode 3

Sun, 03 Feb 2008 09:42:21 -0600

Resale Queen - 2008-02-02.mp3
Show: #003
Length: 23:17
Size: 16.0mb
Format: mp3

This Week's Show: Dumpster Diving Checklilst.

Suburban dumpster diving
Location, location, location
Know the front end - don't want any surprises
Get to know routine
Scout for employees/cops/palette pickers
Leave a car running and ready with door open
Get your stuff and go
Get greedy get hurt
Picking from neighborhoods
Never look the home owner in the eye
How does it change for urban and rural environments?
You have to knock on the dumspter first to get out racoons and feral cats

Next week: Next week we talk eBay Feedback and Fees.

Links: Dawn Shumate sent these great dumpster diving resources. Thanks Dawn!!

http://dir.groups.yahoo.com/dir/Hobbies___Crafts/Hobbies/Dumpster_Diving
http://dir.groups.yahoo.com/dir/Hobbies___Crafts/Hobbies/Secondhand_Shopping

There is a specific dumpster diving group whose goal is to make a map of dumpsters in the Chicago area called garbage liberation.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/garbageliberation/

Most of you will know us from our podcast Croncast (every M-W-F)

Tags: astronaut reslae queen eBay dumpster diving bubble wrap

Season 19 Ep 11: Walzer A., Buffalo Days, The Coffee Drinker

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 10:51:22 -0600

Croncast - 2008-02-01.mp3
Show: #457
Length: 26:13
Size: 18.1mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here!
Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

About the Wednesday show
We were recording and the phone was ringing off the hook
Call from Walzer A
So this is Wednesday's show
Yeah, it was your sister calling
Brother-in-law lost his job
And the three mother hens showed up at his house
I did not envy him at all
It is getting more and more crowded in this boat
Your mom told you that you need to take care of this
I couldn't think of a more depressing situation
I wouldn't have come home
I would have went out at 8 am and got a beer
Where? This isn't Milwaukee
I would have waited that shit out
You are telling me that I am a born leader
I was telling myself that I glad you all weren't here
This is how it goes down in my dysfunctional family
My entire life I have had to be the man
What?
You shoveled in the middle in a snow storm
You can't even tell you shoveled
Doing it repeatedly doesn't make sense
At 4:30 am our neighbor fired up his snow blower
Ridiculous
Some men wake up with motivation, Kris
What would you do if it were a chainsaw?
Then he started cutting down trees
Well, hell he was motivated
Oh, baby
I tossed pup pup in a snowbank
What for?
To send to the TV station
Are you serious?
Well, I did send it
The auto response email was "Thanks for sending to KABC 7 Los Angeles"
Your snowy dog will be on in LA
You dogs suck
Jorge would be restricted to humane society
Ass end up in a garbage can
That is what we should have called the Resale Queen show
Yesterday, I almost slipped and died
Good things that dumpsters are heavy
How come they don't shovel by them?
I am going to open Dumpster Land
A theme park for you and your people
The dangers that you face everyday
It can't be packing peanuts
There is no Calvin pissing on nothing
What stickers would the truck have?
Did the new trucks ever roll out to La Moille?
I though i shouldn't ask because it would be sad
There was a time that they did come out
No one can tie a knot in this town
Ending up in the county jail
Swanson's baby
Onions in the peas
They came to town for Buffalo Days
The quaint small town festivals in movies, lies
There's no tax base to support that
Basketball game in a gravel pit
I grew up across from a buffalo pasture
Did you ride buffalo instead of ponies?
Did they chain them to a claw foot tub to slow them down?
From kindergarten to graduation at 14
Let me run the tilt-a-whirl
I would be right there
Ending up with a corn cob in his bibs
Might be dangerous but in a small town that's fun
Being pulled on sled behind cars
Watching the console in a lawn chair
I have sat in the back of a Chevy and bounced across fields
We didn't do donuts in a Wal Mart parking lot
It was a small town
Ok, K-Mart
That would have been a 30 mile commute
I know you rode in the back of a pickup truck on the way to a K-Mart
Yes, I did
CB radios in those days, figuring out who the coffee drinker was
Your mom would have a handle

View Kris's resume or download it

Tags: buffalo snowy dog LaMoille Resale Queen sledding

Season 19 Ep 3: Wheel of Fortune, Mailmen, Mrs. Coach

Fri, 11 Jan 2008 08:56:44 -0600

Croncast - 2008-01-11.mp3
Show: #449
Length: 28:23
Size: 19.5mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Leave us a comment anytime
After reading the comments I am starting to feel sad
Kris, don't feel sad . . . you'll change your mind
Real reasons
We just do it, it's become part of our day
We've become part of that
It's like a radio station
And they are playing Rod Stewart
What? Kris you have lost your mind
Would you rather I say Nazareth "Hair of the Dog"?
What are you talking about?
You should pre-screen your thoughts
Like a celebrity does
Wive's would love these things
Coming back from the long break
Saying things as opposed to telling stories
It was your birthday it made for a weird show
I have to go to the bank
I noticed you didn't buy your own cake
Yes, I needed to step it up and buy one
The bank was a ruse
Turns out the cake was frozen
Much like you
I couldn't really cut it
I told the kids it was an ice cream cake
I forgot to buy candles
Yeah, you made me blow out a lighter
It wasn't just a Bic
This is why being married to you is difficult
You should just say what I think
Kris starts telling Elliot about the lighter
All I can think is shut up, idiot
He doesn't need to know that stuff
I thought about the house burning down
You gotta pull the thing back and click
Mr B. I am so worried about the Wheel of Fortune audition
What am I going to wear?
What am I going to do with my hair?
I think you are projecting a bit
I am going to start combing my eyebrows over my forehead
I hit 33 and my eyebrows are out of control
Big eyebrows are creepy
I didn't say mono-brow
You think the producers are looking for middle America
A mom with pizzaz
I'm not sure I buy that
Maybe you should watch the show
Men wear suits . . . the same on that they wear to funerals and weddings
All the women wear pins
That reminds me of the coach story when you were helping Andy shop
Leave it up to your mom
She'll just buy it off QVC for you
The UPS man, the mail man and the garbage man all have our numbers
QVC delivered twice a day around here
The mail man knows everything that goes on in your life
She's got QVC on the tv and the laptop
The guy from the Queer Eye show is on, she yells
We wake up every Wednesday morning to breaking glass
The garbage man hates us
The QVC bags all end up scattered around the cul de sac
When I was a kid we got the neighbors mail for a week
I knew that he wasn't paying his bills
Water is a luxury
He spent all of his money on Jaguars and software
Baby, you got unfinished projects everywhere
It's typically the man
Feigning the CWI to watch prison shows
It was a very serious sledding injury
I can wear chest pads
Keeping up with the IRS
Just one of those things
Monday you be blinded by my bespangled sweater and snow man pin
I need to seem charming and wholesome
Don't tell them about the podcast
I already did
Well then you need to be yourself
Jeanie said I won't be funny in a pant suit
I disagree you would look very funny in a pant suit

Tags: Nazareth QVC Rod Stuart Wheel of Fortune Mrs. Coach

Scooter looses every time

Fri, 26 Oct 2007 11:12:58 -0500

This thing stands not a chance when I hop on it.

Six feet, 240 and Hot Wheels aluminum on resin wheels . . . destroying
neighborhoods one cul de sac at a time.

Tags: wheels destroying resin neighborhoods cul

Betsy and her husband Kris Sep 14, 2007

Fri, 14 Sep 2007 10:00:26 -0500

Croncast - 2007-09-14.mp3
Show: #410
Length: 34:42
Size: 23.8mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Sep 14, 2007

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Early insert for TFF - Tell a Friend Friday
Go out and tell a friend about Croncast
We now have a way for you to even tell strangers
STICKERS! They'll be here on Tuesday
Here's what it will look like . . . inside the red area with rounded corners
To get your sticker send $2.00 support from the site or get 3 stickers for $5.00

Now to the show notes
Trescadecaphobes yesterday was the day
Today it is safe it is the 14th
It was a good 13th for me
You are on a nerd high Mr. B . . . I'm gonna let you roll
Yeah, I am stoked
I saw in Google Reader that TechCrunch 40 had 5 press/blogger passes available
Sent Jason Calacanis a message
Hour and a half later I was good to go
So thanks to Jason . . . I am really looking forward to the event
I'll crank out some podcasts
Thanks to Rick and Robin for putting me up next week
I'll get to see the solar panels
We should buy carbon credits from them
It's good to be all in Mr B
Like I said, you've got to strike while the iron is hot
Can I now tell my story, Kris
I had a creepy thing happen to me last night
I gotta thank people
I don't tell people thank you enough
You don't
I know baby
I had the best lesson taught to me by my uncle
He sent me a thank you note
Then on the back it said, "This is what a thank you not looks like."
He told you!
Betsy's problem is she buys them and writes them but just doesn't follow through
The only person that always gets them in neighbor . . . I can walk them over
So what happened on your dark night
Yeah, your creepy story . . . sorry that I asked
Get off the stage bitch
I don't have to work with anyone
I reallize that I left my purse in the bar
The drunk bouncer stops me and cuts me off
He's a drunk frat boy
Where them diet chocolate shakes at
He gets all up in my face
Sucking in my oxygen, that close
Listen, I am as old as dirt
We get into this battle of the wits
My she is fabulous . . . she is so witty
Do you know what he did?
Started crying
No, he kissed me
Silence
The most disgusting moment of my life
I know you stepped back into his personal space
So he kissed you . . . where?
My lips
I was shocked
I can't believe you are telling me now, not last night
You didn't seem to mention it
Yeah, I'm running away with the bouncer
Takes a certain type of dude to handle a lady like you
Don't take that personally
Your behavior can be interpreted different ways
I did not invade this man's space
Think of the sweet alley action he gets
I gotta tell you not a big fan of improv night or Bar Louie
I didn't expect to hear this
No, I don't find it alright to deal with
The most competent individual you can hire for $6
The score is 1 me, you 0
The reason that I have an issue with it is that I would have rumbled
I would have hit him
Really?
Notice how I said I would have hit him, not kicked his ass
Oh, Mr. B
Improv class might not be my thing
Betsy tells us all about improv
You are milking that imaginary cow all wrong
Oh, no, no . . . I was in FFA I know how to milk a cow city man

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: Bar Louie TechCrunch 40 Jason Calacanis TFF croncast stickers

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 22, 2007

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 07:22:02 -0500

Croncast - 2007-08-22.mp3
Show: #400
Length: 35:37
Size: 24.4mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 22, 2007

The banner says #400 and it is correct
Betsy wants cards now
I am 50 percent of this show sucka!
You treat me like your cousin with a pick-up truck
"Don't ask me to help you move"
Put a sticker on my Volvo
"Don't ask me to help you podcast"
Suburban drama for you Kris
I have been hiding it all day
Bait and switch, You're like a dog Mr. B
Looked into the mailbox
And apparently some of our garbage blew into a neighbors yard
A ton of wet garbage was in it
There was orange stuff like I made it
If it had been out there a week why didn't you pick it up?
I haven't walked by it for a week
Since these people like grass so much
I am going to stuff their mail boxes with grass clippings
The 70 year old moms with college age kids here
One mommy walking on the other side of the street
I should segue back to when we first started the show
Bear you got to try
What has happened over time?
You started out positive . . . now look at you
I started out negative with no expectation for happiness in the burbs . . . now look at me
Yeah, I never leave the house
You keep driving my car
I have driven it 60 miles in the last 6 weeks
The last 800 have come from you
I feel tacky riding around with no hood ornament
What goes around comes around
Before we left for Seattle I was supposed to tell the traffic ticket story
Well, the court story from Denver
I didn't lie to you . . . I just didn't tell you
I knew better than to tell you
I was in a little Scion
Sure I was driving too fast
Has road food so swelled your man cleavage that you can't see the speedometer?
Speed limit should have been 65
Would Mr. Michael Scott please stand up?
This woman stands up
Judge asks 3 times if the person standing is Mr. Michael Scott
I'm thinking Steve Carell from the Office
People at my meeting told me it was speed trap
Made jokes that Colorado is out to get me
I knew on my way to the meeting that I wasn't going to tell
30 minutes of you yelling at me on the show
You would have told me that I was going to end up in jail
Mr. Michael Scott turns out to be a trucker
Betsy says, being pulled over while being tranny

We made it to #400! Thanks for letting us be a part of your life and allowing us to make you laugh. Yes, life is show prep and full of Croncast moments.

Thanks to Bernadette for this review and write up!

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: Steve Carell 400 podcasts Croncast grass clippings Denver moving violations

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 15, 2007

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 11:33:00 -0500

Croncast - 2007-08-15.mp3
Show: #397
Length: 29:34
Size: 20.3mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 15, 2007

photo on left by dave winer and photo on right by josh hallet thanks to both!

Join Croncast Cronies . . . thanks to all those signed up already!.

The nerd things that drive me crazy
Betsy is going to find me a online geek mistress
That would be sweet
You go ahead and marry that girl Mr. B
After days of this haven't you had enough?
Apologies for no show on Monday
I blew it on Sunday and had to take the red eye
No one wants to hear your drama
If it were done on graph paper it would have all been good
I didn't hear any of this "life would be better on paper" at Gnomedex
Here's what made it so cool
I had my nerds on one hand and my baby on the other
It was our 11th wedding anniversary
Yeah, and you take me to a nerd convention
Your nerd buddies are cooler and much more high functioning than I thought
Apologies to me for the ewok comment
A dude was dressed as a pirate
It was just one guy
The 12 sided dice and hoods were missing
The 11th wedding anniversary is as special as turning 36
Up to 10 you are swimming upstream . . . after that . . . floating in a tube
Seattle is a great place
You didn't plan our dinner Mr. B
Yes I did . . . reservations are a plan!
That is a large step
The restaurant turned out to be really nice
There was an attentive gay waiter
Can you hire one of those for me here at home
The beautiful view
Then a 3 story tall lighted Cadillac Escalade barge floated by
Nice view
The other awesome part was that you got to meet some listeners
Mark is an awesome guy
I know I told you that
Yeah, but you are usually wrong
At the party I saw the nerds trying to sink into their ringer tees
You have blossomed like a $10 orchid
Having social skills, Mr. B you have grown
Betsy got to see me in my element
I still don't get your people
Let's take Kosso for instance?
You can't pick Kosso he is normal
What about the guy dressed as a pirate Mr B?
The dudes that split a suit
The pic on right above is from the Thursday night out
Strange woman talking to us, looks at floor and walks away
The nerd wife put one shiny shoe right in front of him
My Nerd!
This nerd off limits
She busts out, "Well, I dress him!"
Not in a ha ha way
I don't understand your "Party Only" badge
She scared me
Those chicks look alright . . . "The Women of WarCraft"
God Damn
I'm not in to that type of stuff
These chicks were hot on a nerd level scale
We're going to score some mad nerd ass tonight
My people were talking to you because you were a personable lady
You've got nerd engagement skills
You've got to pretend your eyes are lasers
Yep, right here buddy
Asking a nerd what they do is not the right thing to ask
It is always difficult to explain
You asked me what the hell do you do?
Then tell them my title . . . right, what does that mean
The guy on the way home asked me, what do you do?
What was your reply Betsy?
I do nothing. I buy and sell shit.
So your husband is a nerd? Are you a nerd?
No
Do you podcast?
Yes
How many times a week?
3
You're not a nerd?
Do you sell your stuff online?
Yes
You're not a nerd?
Do you watch Heroes?
Yes
Watch John From Cincinnati?
Yes
You're not a nerd?
When buying swag for nerd events don't buy them white shirts
The other great part for me was first alcoholic beverage in 10 years
I had to announce it because you called me the teetotaling nerd husband
Not he hardcore found Jesus type of not drinking
That's not it Betsy
My first drink was Jagermeister with Aaron Brazell
I broke the seal and enjoyed the libations
Had an awesome time on Saturday night with Mark, Greg, Aaron, Kosso, Steve, Josh, Dave C., Mike, Chris, Michael and Dave D.
Not having to be on, Betsy's specialty
Betsy does her first improv class
Pretend you are a tree
Were you there?
My theater background is you know . . .
Yeah, lying under a theater major once doesn't count
My neighbor is in this class
Leave us some comments
Great American Yard Sale is this weekend
Thanks to Bernadette for this review and write up!

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Tags: Gnomedex 2007 Seattle Great American Yard Sale improv class The Women of WarCraft Jagermeister

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 06, 2007

Mon, 06 Aug 2007 08:24:48 -0500

Croncast - 2007-08-06.mp3
Show: #394
Length: 36:42
Size: 25.2mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 06, 2007

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Early intro to explain this show has lots of the electric popping noise in it. I thought I had this figured out for the show recording but I didn't. However, I did find a solution after today's show was recorded . . . clear shows from here on out.

My windscreen smells like a pack of condoms
What you got in your suitcase?
Yeah it has packed since I left for Colorado
OK Kris, mine smells like a today's sponge left out for four days
It's been 3 weeks since we have done a show with just us
The untold story, I almost didn't go to Colorado, Kris
Is this like Slowsky?
We fly in the face of karma
I preemptively heed the warnings
Four days out from leaving for Boulder it begins
Like the Volvo won't come out of park again
OK Blackwater Betsy
They drag the old decrepit bitch in
Volvo of Lisle has repaired it for the 4th time
They give me a Hyundai
We know what the problem is mam . . . you dripped some soda in there
No, look at the record . . . this is the 4th time
If I can't drink soda in my car remove the cup holders
The problem is that everything in the gear shifting area has been replaced
Splenda is not sugar, it is a secret ingredient in concrete
Now I owe the dealership $300
That is one less cool experience at Elk Mountain Resort
How am I going to help you out? I will be in San Francisco
That would be cash at hand
Your guilt and negativity goes both ways
I get to the DMV with Gigi on my hip to get new plates
Line to another line to another line
Boss Hog will drag you out by your ear
Don't get out of hand Ms. Mommy pant
Can we get a supervisor over here?
I know that is the auditor
Mam, your plates are illegal!
Oh, now I am going to be arrested at the DMV
I end up in a line with bikers
A line full of the scariest men
They all keep trying to talk to Goo
I've never seen a baby give that look
She's not going to ride bitch to anybody
She'll be leading your gang in 10 years
I know exactly what the problem is
There is only one man in Springfield who can take care of this
The bikers, Skanky and Skanky
It turns out that Skanky wants to sell his car to Skanky
Maggie hears the guy yell and she freaks out
Now I am freaking out
All your fault Mr. B
Your likability was going down by the day
The plates from Slowsky moved over to Volvo
I don't own the Volvo, you do Kris!!!!
What if I want to hit the road in peace?
Thanks Oprah
I was in there for 53 minutes
I got sucked in to other peoples drama as I waited
Betsy gets attacked by a tick
Now she needs to tell the neighborhood
The neighbor tells her that she just got back from New Jersey
She was there to help out a family member that got sick from a tick bite
The ticks in New Jersey know your name before they attack
This is all happening the night before you leave
Thank god the Elk Mountain staff is released early every morning to remove all ticks and flea dip the deer
I will never have a vacation as good as this because I am married to you
Oh, you are too kind baby
I was holed up 30 miles from Boulder in a hotel by the highway
They call themselves suburbs, but they don't know
Working late at night doing the nerd thing
I get to the hotel late
You're supposed to have a non-smoking . . . don't have it
You're supposed to have king . . . don't have it
The room smelled musty and like nothing I had smelled before
All this while I have to rationalize hopping into a bed that a lot lizard just has sex with a trucker in
The next morning I wake up and head down to the front desk
I bitch and moan then realize that this girl is 11 years old
I ask to be moved to another room
She reaches into her pocket and pulls cell phone
A roadside motel run by pre-teens
"I can't move you but my mom can. I can call her to come down here."
I rolled on out
I came back the next night and asked to be moved again
We can move you . . . but not for three days
I then get the burrito craving
Qdoba happens to be open right next to the truck stop
You're gonna have to re-wrap that burrito
Why?
Beans were falling out of it
He looks at me, "Sir you need to understand . . . if you bit into this it will explode in your face."
This can't be fucking happening
I am going to eat it here and cut it in half
His eyes twinkle . . . are you sure that you don't want us to cut it . . . I have a really big knife
His concern for my burrito did not go unnoticed
Colorado out to get me . . . three months ago
Stop Mr. B you can't tell this story we've gone too long
We'll be in Seattle on Thursday!!!
If you can make a live show we'll be doing it
If more than 6 people want to come we need to get a place to do it
I have one fan . . .Mexico Mike, total troll
Selling mescaline by the highway
I'll be in on the 8th at 10 am
We'll be there for our 11th anniversary
Why spend alone we want you
Thanks to Bernadette for this review and write up!

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Tags: Qdoba burrito hotel by the highway Longmont CO exploding burrito Volvo of Lisle

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 01, 2007

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 10:42:30 -0500

Croncast - 2007-08-01.mp3
Show: #392
Length: 1:05:10
Size: 44.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 01, 2007

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We've made it into the month of August
You've now crossed into Elk Mountain Resort and Valhalla Shooting Club
Sure you don't want to bitch about Boulder some more?
I like Boulder, there are just some things I don't
We roll up and there is a guard tower
Was he standing there with a rifle?
No, Mr B
It is a gorgeous view
Flanked by beauty
The guard comes ambling up to the Volvo
Your names ladies?
We give them, remember this
"Do you ladies have any firearms with you?"
No firearms in this Volvo
This wagon is clear
He gives us directions
We roll on up
Elk Mountain Resort is beautiful
The valet pulls it four feet away and parks
The woman on hotels.com just kept complaining about it
She is nuts
Jeannie says the place is like Annie
Everyone stands to greet you as you walk in
Then there was Santa Claus
A dude with a white beard and red suit?
No, he had a uniform and a "I love my job smile"
He's got hot towels on a silver platter
He looks at me and says, "Mrs. Smith would you like a towel?"
He looks at Jeannie, "Mrs. Smith would you like a towel?"
Shit, the deal is sealed, we are the dykes
Welcome to first class
It took us 9 hours from Boulder
We'll make everything guided for you
What time would you ladies like dinner?
This Mrs. Smith would like to eat before 7:30
Mrs. Smith and I would like to eat in 45 minutes
Santa has an ear piece and a chest mic
He talks into it and poof the bell hop appears
We get to our room and the view is gorgeous
If you don't like it dial "0"
The bed looks like a cloud from heaven
I got Wal-Mart sheets
Jeanie, "We have robes!"
Hers and hers robes would have been nice
So we get dressed for dinner
It was intimidating, we felt like we didn't fit
Then I bust out the gift certificate
We wanted to play it cool
Sure, you want to fit in
They were nicer than your grandma who hasn't see you in three years
Every time you walk in the door the staff stands
Oh, are you ladies here for dinner?
I'll announce you, then he speaks into his lapel, "The Smiths are here for dinner."
You haven't told them yet?
No I was waiting for Jeannie
Who's the man, the big footed one with a bad perm
Are there any other guests at the resort?
Two other men not talking
There were 10 total guests at the resort
We order our dinner and they ask for drinks
My mom always orders the house wine, the cheap stuff
I'll have a Mountain Dew won't go over well
Jeannie hates red wine but follows Betsy's lead
Hi, I'm Chef Jeff, which house wine is best for you?
They start bringing out bread baskets and baked stuff
Chef Jeff is like, "Fuck dude! I worked on that all day and you can't say it."
I look at Jeannie, I can tell she doesn't like it
Been there and done that
Jeannie is woofing it down
I have to eat at least half of it
The two men eating alone are now joined by someone I recognize
The owner that I had seen on The Daily Show
Kris if you kick it up a notch we can do this every weekend
He comes over to the table
Asks what activities we are going to do
ATV's and shooting
We are the only resort in the entire world to have access for ATV's
Jeannie, "I love the outdoors but I can't go up high"
Our ATV's are automatic
They've thought of everything
Yes, everything
On the ride you will come to a place called Top of the World
So high that airplanes will fly below
Then he launches in to the special lights
These are based on the biologic make up of a lobster's eye
They are used to melt the snow to make an ice tunnel
Mr. Foreman continues to talk about the press they have gotten
A book on the NYT Best Sellers list is based at Elk Mountain Resort
He had me sold . . . I wanted to kiss a bear and drive to the top of the world
Why would you think that you couldn't do something?
Tom Foreman makes you believe that you can do anything
Enter the rest of the guests
Three sets of couples that look like my neighbors
Fit soccer moms?
Yes, Kris
I just drove 4 states over to get away from them
Now they are going to spoil my mountain view
Mr. Foreman goes over to the new couples
The super sweet firebox
Then our food comes
Every time there was another opportunity to be put in our place
We were still really awkward
Betsy has a bowl of puss and I get a bowl of noodles
It was couscous Jeannie
Jeannie starts to panic, all I get are these noodles
Campbell's has everything including broth
Then they bring the broth
After that they bring out dinner
The whole thing was terrific
Except that we were both completely terrified
To get over the petrification of being treated so well and Elk Mountain Resort stay more nights
Kris you are the king of upgrade
So after dinner Santa jumps up
We get our bill after dinner
Betsy goes white
Shut up Jeannie, I'll tell you later
The one thing you can't return is food
What I was freaking out about was that our house wine turned out to be $18 a glass
From their perspective, the lesbians aren't satisfied
Chef Jeff asks if dinner was to their liking
Then Thomas comes over and asks
After that the waitress comes up
Sure, they are trained like the CIA to read unhappiness
What would you ladies like to do?
We would like a jacuzzi?
Our eyes meet and we realize . . . they aren't out to get us . . . they are out to spoil us
Drinking our sangria in the hot tub
The cheap wine was awesome
Betsy took 100 pics of the tops of trees
At the Boulder art fair there was a dude with aspen photos
So we retire to the room and Jeannie puts on a robe
Sliding into the bed of heaven
Mrs. Smith, this is going to be the greatest night of my life
The greatest part of this is that I have no kids to wake me up
Betsy wakes up at 6:01 for coffee and viewing birds that were probably released for my pleasure
Do you know how much this is costing per minute? Get up Jeannie
We decide to take a hike
We start to walk by workers that gardening
When they see you they stop, stand, smile and ask you if you need anything
Landscapers saw us, they froze like deer
When we went by them they commenced working again
Tom has thought of everything
When a crossed eyed man in golf cart tells you "good luck" heed his warning
People are freezing along the trail "I'm a tree. I'm a tree. I'm a tree"
Maybe the trail was made for someone who came one time
Betsy, they did not release cows into the national forest for you to view
Queue the cattle
Someone left it on the comment card no doubt
Gotta watch out for the feral cows
Jeannie was petrified of them
Now you know why he told you good luck
That guy used to not be cross eyed till a cow incident
We can hear them shrieking and yelling
There they are . . . the soccer moms on the zip line
Whew, my Nike sports bra is twisted
We are on our way back
Jeannie freezes as we stand on Have you told anyone that you are not Mrs. Smith?
I see two brown ears rising out of this draining ditch
Out jumps a giant mule deer
Betsy chases it to take it's photo
The lesbians are crazy!
What are the lesbians doing now?
Time for lunch on the patio
We need some cigarettes and an ashtray
"Can I have an ashtray?"
She speaks into her cleavage mic
Around the corner, "I'm on it"
I know it is fun to play spies but this is weird
It was awesome though, instant ashtray
Lesbians are on porch, queue deer
Queue the geese
Then the soccer moms come bouncing back fit and tan
"Where are you guys from?"
Bloomington. "We are going to drive through there."
Their husbands, reserved and uptight
Screw it, this is all about me
I am going to make the soccer moms laugh
She swore that she was thirsty and all the sudden water showed up
"Guess how many kids we have?"
I don't know this is a game?
We have 10 combined?
How many are girls?
One
Then they struck a bad ass soccer mom pose
They brought things like running shoes
Betsy brought Crocs and sandals
Perfect lesbian gear
The soccer moms told us that the ATV's were awesome
We get ready to go and Misha shows up
I have done this ride 500 times and not lost 1 person yet
She takes out these top gun flight suits
I brought you the biggest ones we have
Betsy, "Of course mine won't zip up"
Jeannie, "neither will mine"
Jeannie you rock!
This could be customer service boot camp
Their motto must be "we are not going to tell you no"
They actually import vans from Europe to fit through their gates
Probably because it is more aesthetically pleasing
This is my new motto, "It is all about me"
Betsy gives me the thumbs up and then hits a tree
So we're going up the mountain
Jeannie is flying behind Misha
Betsy is stuck
I look down and my left hand has the brake so tight that I won't move
When you got on the quad the Unitarian in you took over
It was trying to save you
Oh, I'm sorry when was the last time you drove an ATV up a mountain
Betsy is trying to avoid the sticks
"Mam, that is an all terrain vehicle. Run over the sticks."
Hitting trees really hurts
Right before we get to The Top of the World
I look up and it is all Aspens and cattle
Jeannie starts to freak
Get me past that cow so fast
I am getting away from that cow so fast
Kris, we got to the top of mountain
You can see Utah, three mountain ranges at 9000 ft
We both had brown mustaches
It added to the lesbianism
Every time Betsy talks to the staff it is about her husbands and kids
Talk into your chest, the lesbians are not lesbians
These people are awesome
Misha ran a camp for bad ass kids
Like outward bound? Way scarier
Working at Elk Mountain Resort is top of the food chain
You have got to put in your time
John of course is an ex-Navy Seal
He is bad ass
You feel amazingly comfortable and slightly scared
I love men like that. Don't you Jeannie
Sure, he was handsome too
OK, time for this podcast to end
We ended on the ATV's and it was time to drink
Don't hand the truck driver the bottle
Four or five inches of vodka
Kris, we almost drank an entire bottle of vodka
Jeannie is naked in a robe and slippers
We are ripped
You are so awesome . . . No, you are so awesome
I look at clock and it is 9:00 p.m. and we haven't eaten
We dial "0" and they tell us that the dining room is still open for us
We arrive and there are flames to the ceiling
Chef Jeff is making bananas foster
The soccer moms start to speak to us
Betsy with her vodka mouth
"Are we going to be on your webcast?", soccer moms
Jeannie loves it when I get out of control
"We should introduce ourselves"
No that is OK, I already have a name for you, "The bad ass soccer moms"
It could go either way
Then the leader dies laughing
Right, there has to be an Alpha mom in the group
Yes, the one with the longest Escalade, the EXT
So Chef Jeff comes over
Betsy, "A-1 Jeff we're trashed. Can I call you Chef Jeff from now on"
That's not chatting it up that is drunk babble
Chef Jeff really made it
We don't go to gourmet restaurants and have the chef talk to us for 40 minutes
It was entirely phenomenal
Kris, I know we have talked about how I challenged the Russian to a vodka drinking contest
Can I take it back when you order the most expensive item on the menu?
And I was on the urge of vomiting
Kobe beef times 2 with bananas foster
Betsy looks at me like you better eat that bitch
Chef Jeff is buying us drinks
And I have to deny him because now I can't see him
I don't know where I am at
We stumble back to our room
There is that point, where you realize that I am done my man
Jeannie deals with Betsy, I am sick
I will lay in the bed of heaven
Betsy has the her cigarettes and the camera around her neck
You ticked me off
You don't like me anymore?
I'll like you tomorrow
You just ripped my underwear and are out of control
I proceed to go to the most beautiful bathroom in the states
And I don't even have to use my muscles
I have an exorcism of the most expensive meal I have ever ate
More babbling from Betsy
Typical Betsy move, "I made myself throw up"
This is the best planned bathroom of all time
6 feet from toilet to wall on a slate floor
Betsy made a bed right there with a Turkish robe
And I fell asleep on that cold stone slate floor and it felt so good
As I was falling asleep I thought to myself . . .
I love John, Misha, Chef Jeff and I love Tom the most
Why? Because he was smart enough to put a twin bed in the water closet
I don't know what we were thinking by drinking so much
I have nicotine and alcohol poisoning . . . I need to dial "0"
We have to do another show for Valhalla
It was the most emotional day of Jeannie's life
Sorry about your underwear dude
I'll get you a Target gift certificate
These were Victoria Secret
Do you know how much stuff I will have to find and sell from Goodwill?
Final installment of Elk Mountain Resort and Valhalla comes your way tomorrow!

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Tags: kobe beef bananas foster Elk Mountain Resort Valhalla Shooting Club Chef Jeff bad ass soccer moms

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 18, 2007

Mon, 18 Jun 2007 08:09:14 -0500

Croncast - 2007-06-18.mp3
Show: #377
Length: 33:05
Size: 22.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 18, 2007

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After Friday's show you deserve this show. I haven't laughed this hard listening to one of our shows when doing up show notes ever.

Switched up the intro and Betsy gets lost
I finally get to tell my Entourage show intro beef because the fixed
What was the issue, flipped text
I don't think HBO gave the show a shot because the intro was jacked up
Bless you baby
Season 4 of Entourage they fixed the "Pizza" thing, sweet
Flight of the Conchords isn't on my watch list
Not a fan of the musical in any format
The Tudors dude is short and that ruined it for me
Tom Cruise wears flats, Tudors man should
Kris puts a ban nationwide on hummus
God damn, there is so much bad breath in this country because of it
The effort and strain that it takes to be married to Kris
It was like 105 degrees up there?
Did you put on some sunscreen?
No
That's not the point
Did you drink water?
That's not he point
Did you wear a hat?
That's not the point
Self-care skills are nil in your case, Mr. B
I understand that being healthy is important
The playset used to be log cabin
They can't destroy it because Abraham Lincoln might have slept in it
Yeah, the other daddies sleep with their lawnmower in their bedroom
He hasn't mowed his lawn longer than me
All I have to say is . . .
A big well of pity
Happy father's day Mr B.
That'll teach him . . . should have worn sunscreen
Look at the nice swing set with Abraham Lincoln wood
It is now a shiny beacon of play land for kids
Abe would be proud
I knew it would be done
The neighbors got the Rainbow Swing set
900 fat men could sit on it an not break it
I accidentally set myself up in a Betsy joke
So he says it to daddy and it's on
He should have been saying it to you
Man, Booba you are just full the Mr. B hate
You did a good job Mr B
I didn't know you knew how to use those tools
Back to the banning of hummus
Sweating out every last bit of water in body
Betsy hanging out breastfeeding and eating hummus
The interior of the house doesn't smell like dogs, cats or baby poop
It smells like Betsy's hummus death
It all came to me in a flash
I was embarrassed when your friends came over
Betsy's throat hummus fills the entire house
The real problem is that all the toothpaste in the world is poison
But, Jesus, the Tom's Natural Toothpaste is horrible
Elliot, "You can't eat the toothpaste. If you do it taste like you swallowed a plant."
Hippies shouldn't make anything that goes in your mouth
Neighbors cutting down trees again
We plant a tree, they cut down three
Now it is on our driveway as mulch
We debated for a long time, but the tree was going to fall down
Right, and your kids will die too
Was the tree sick?
The tree care guy said it had a patch of fungus that could grow
What sort of fear mongers must the tree care specialists be?
Trees will kill you in your sleep in the middle of the night
It is their favorite time to fall over and crush you
So what did I find in the river?
Here's crazy shit #997 that happens to me and Kris
I'll finish it on Wednesday's show

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Tags: Rainbow swingset Entourage Flight of the Conchords Abraham Lincoln cabin hummus death

The Gary Busy of animals

Thu, 31 May 2007 06:59:55 -0500

Garbage day was today, one day late thanks to the holiday, and the raccoons that usually party at the end of our driveway at 3 a.m. missed their grub.

In response they pulled a Gary Busy on me and when I took the garbage out at 6 a.m. I found that they left me some gifts other than ripped open Chinese take out and half-eaten diapers.

They thought it would be funny to leave me a string of poop down the center of the driveway between the cars. Odd, yes, but I know they are trying send me a message for not making the black bag offering full of kiddie dinner scraps.

And to get even with me? They poop between the cars, knowing full well, that as soon as Elliot runs outside in the morning to go to school and hop in the car he will be blinded by it's shininess, run around like a mad man laughing and yelling about it. Then, when I need to bring him back to earth, I'll have to explain that it came from the crazy raccoons who are threatening us to extort our trash.

He won't believe me. He'll think I'm crazy and tell stories about me for the rest of his life about how his old man thought that the neighborhood animals had a Soprano-esque society that extended to roughing up their human counterparts.

It's true. I swear.

Well, maybe it's not, but damn. Why they gotta poop on the driveway and make me have to clean it up before I've checked my email?

Tags: garbage day raccoon party half-eaten diapers table scraps shininess

Spring time is tree killin' time

Tue, 22 May 2007 08:54:07 -0500

Our neighbors on all sides of us have gone ape crazy for killing their trees this year. I am thinking that it must have something to do with the 9 new trees we've planted in the last 3 years.

Either that or these people know something that I don't about the secret lives of trees. If there are any amateur or school aged dendrochronologists out there feel free to mosey on over figure out the average un-natural life expectancy of a suburban elm.

Tags: dendrochronologist killing trees planting trees dendrochronology suburban elms