past | Croncast - Life is Show Prep

Season 22 Ep 06: The Hiatus is Over

Thu, 21 May 2009 16:21:56 -0500

Croncast - 2009-05-22.mp3
Show: #532
Length: 20:41
Size: 19.0 mb
Format: mp3

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We're back for a 20 minute episode
A little low down on what we're up to
Some Betsy digging into my past
The Great LaMoille fire of 1888
And part hypnotherapy for the dogs
I'm heading to Boston tomorrow
Betsy wants to get life advice from VH1
I will use this in the divorce someday to get the kids
What have you learned from our show?

Tags: Boston Mystery STD Nurse FSBO

Make better RSS feeds by not making them

Fri, 24 Apr 2009 08:00:20 -0500

Did you pick the content of the RSS feeds that you are syndicating from your site right now? Or did you let your readers pick?

Within reason my guess would be that most of you answered, yes then no. I know on my sites, even this site, I would have answered the same.

The solution isn't to create more feeds. The best solution is for publishers to create no feeds at all. Let your readers make their own.

Here are a couple examples why this is a better method for content syndication than relying on your own editorial skills.

Example 1: How not to do it.

Don't get me wrong on this, CNET is offering nearly all of its content up for syndication. This is an excellent strategy to create value from older content. However, do readers really need the option of subscribing to 100 plus predefined RSS feeds? Simply, no.

Finding feeds for the topics you are interested in is difficult. The worst of it is that you can only access them individually, i.e.; you want 10 of feeds, copy and paste them one by one into your feed reader. Sounds like a party to me. If you have more skills you might use a service that rolls all of them up into one feed for you. I would guess that about three people have done this.

Why overwhelm your readers like this? And besides, it is pretty intimidating for someone new to the RSS game. Shouldn't they be able to access your content in a way that makes it relevant to them?

Example 2: How to do RSS right.

What you see above is one of two flavors of how to let your readers pick what they receive in RSS feeds. It's a simple and easy to use text input that allows readers to enter keywords and phrases that they want in their feed. There's nothing fancy, easy access to old content in the straight-forward way that RSS is delivered; updates of the newest items first and set number items in the feed, usually twenty-five.

What the second screen shot shows is the magic of thinking differently about RSS feeds. This image demonstrates what happens when someone clicks on the 'advanced' link. The reader is then given control over every aspect of the RSS feed. They choose the content, when it is delivered, how much content, in what order (none of this newest stuff first mumbo jumbo - great use for episodic content) and how many updates to get at a time.

Who is better to choose than the person doing the consuming? RSS needs to be like Burger King where a customer can have it their way.

When this concept is applied to large volumes of content the value of it increases with each new article or podcast. Imagine if you could have this type of access at the NY Times or with your local paper. Even the obits from 30 years ago are now of value again. Value to the reader and value to the publisher with ad inventory.

The future of content syndication isn't in prescriptive channels created by publishers. The future is in the subjective choices of the consumer. They neither need or want every product that you have to offer.

We need to be smarter about our syndicated content via RSS and take into consideration how to make that user experience more satisfying. Whether it is by allowing users to pick topics or order of updates, something needs to change. Why? Because it is all about attention; the premium of which is measured in subscribers, influence and the influence of those subscribers.

Tags: RSS CNET readers consumers interaction

Season 22 Ep 01: The problem with show business, Restless leg syndrome

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 14:32:14 -0500

Croncast - 2009-04-15.mp3
Show: #526
Length: 29:05
Size: 26.7 mb
Format: mp3

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Living the dream
Betsy back at it with Goodwill and plates again
Heaping pile of plushies
Chicken wire can't be used in medical
What have we learned?
You could do a killer silk flower arrangement
I would crush you, Betsy
The components I would have
Sneaking a cigarette
It all works together
Wait till you see what I am going to do with it
What did you want to be when you grew up?
Away from here . . . that was it
Ending up in the t-shirt biz
It was a great time
I meant the Chump gear guys
Always wanted to be somewhere else than where I was
Restless leg syndrome
Rehashing the past
I had no idea
And I have no idea now
The junkin' comedian
$40 pay checks from the comedy shrine
The funniest was the awe that filled your dad
When?
When you said you were thinking about getting a job

Tags: silk flowers goodwill plushies Chump Gear restless leg syndrome

Season 21 Ep 12: Triscadecaphobic, Mental Sabbatical, Rescue Animals

Fri, 13 Feb 2009 12:49:11 -0600

Croncast - 2009-02-13.mp3
Show: #512
Length: 24:13
Size: 22.3 mb
Format: mp3

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This show brought to you by Affordable Promotions
I won't say the date
A bit triscadecaphobic are we?
As usual
I know how this goes
It's a big business day
The cyclical nature of our moon phases matched with a Friday the ____
Happy Valentines Day Mr B
I'm going to buy you a gross of coffee mugs with my face on them
Great, I could sell them at Starbucks or a quarter
WachterBach haul
Sounds like a Worcester sauce
Pfaltzgraff and a fancy brand called Kimberly-Clark
Getting the freezer
"I remember that like it was yesterday"
That makes you old
The recall feature to tell the stories properly
Hercules came to me while I was sleeping
The stories that people tell about their rescue animals
What is going on with Facebook?
Everyone is showing up
All of your past infested lovers
I can see my friend that is now on a mental sabbatical

Tags: mental sabbatical moon phases triscadecaphobic wachterbach

buffalo pasture

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 21:38:08 -0500

this is the view west on the street in front of the my folks house.

that would be the highway, then pasture. the sound of cars flying by and the view really took me back.

Tags: view pasture sound cars back

Season 20 Ep 22: Sunny World, Community Improv, Archive Alive

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:52:05 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-11.mp3
Show: #497
Length: 29:51
Size: 20.5 mb
Format: mp3

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What was that?
Keep the Archive Alive?
Yes, it was
Support future listeners and the new show by sending support
How?
The banner above
Let's keep it trucking along by supporting the past
That is, the past, for the future

Tags: show name sad portraits grandma's glamour hard and shiny

elliot didn't get any stitches. but how about some space age metal!

Thu, 08 May 2008 16:43:58 -0500

as elliot blazes new medical treatments for the family, we are left with nothing to say, but he was lucky to have caught the gardening hoe on the head. better the top of his dome than an ear or finger finding their way under it.

he was quite upset when it happened, to be expected, but his little friend that was wielding the hoe was crying even harder. i think the blood freaked him out the most as he refused to come into the house.

as a parent, this situation didn't bother betsy or me that much given his past medical history.

Tags: medical elliot hoe harder crying

Croncast stickers in the wild

Thu, 08 May 2008 08:16:54 -0500

Here are some shots of Croncast stickers that have made it out of the manpit and found caring new owners. Thanks for representin'!

Photo by: Josh Bancroft

Josh knows what time it is!

Photo by: glemak

So do glemak.

Photo by: Jesse Marvin

I don't think Betsy has ever been this close to a pitbull before.

If you've got a Croncast sticker picture send it on, we'll make you famous . . . or something.

I've been asked in the past who we used for our stickers and will throw it in here since they have awesome customer service, Sticker Giant.

Updates:

Photo by: Stepan Mazurov

Tags: ipod touch Sticker Giant Croncast stickers

Croncast Listener Survey Results

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 18:28:13 -0500

Well, we've shared with you, and now you've shared with us. Below is the survey data that over 200 of you filled out during the past year. I thought you guys might like to see what other listeners think of the show (good and bad), spend online, how much loot they make, if they have or don't have kids and a ton of other stuff.

Thanks for sharing!

Update: Likes and Dislikes have been moved to their own post.

Demographics
What is your age?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	<12	1	1%
	18-24	8	4%
	25-34	90	42%
	35-44	83	39%
	45-54	22	10%
	55-64	9	4%
Totals		213	100%

What is your gender?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Male	118	55%
	Female	95	45%
Totals		213	100%

What is the highest level of education you have achieved?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Less than high school graduate	3	1%
	Graduated high school or received equivalent degree (e.g., GED)	9	4%
	Attended college but did not graduate	40	19%
	Graduated from 2-year college	23	11%
	Graduated from 4-year college	79	37%
	Masters Degree	44	21%
	Doctoral Degree	10	5%
	Other Professional Degree (MD, LLB, etc)	5	2%
Totals		213	100%

Please indicate which best describes the total combined income before taxes of all members of your household.
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Under $5,000	5	3%
	$10,000 - $19,999	5	3%
	$20,000 - $29,999	12	6%
	$30,000 - $39,999	15	7%
	$40,000 - $49,999	12	6%
	$50,000 - $59,999	25	12%
	$60,000 - $74,999	20	10%
	$75,000 - $99,999	32	16%
	$100,000 - $149,999	53	26%
	$150,000 - $199,999	16	8%
	$200,000 or over	9	4%
Totals		204	100%

What is your employment status?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Full-time (35 hours or more)	156	73%
	Part-time (less than 35 hours)	16	8%
	Student	12	6%
	Retired	5	2%
	Temporarily unemployed	1	1%
	Homemaker	19	9%
	Other	4	2%
Totals		213	100%

What is your current marital status?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Married	146	70%
	Single, never married	45	21%
	Divorced or Separated	18	9%
	Widowed	1	1%
Totals		210	100%

Counting yourself, how many people are currently living in your household?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	1	24	11%
	2	67	32%
	3	39	19%
	4	54	26%
	5	20	10%
	6	3	1%
	7	1	1%
	8	2	1%
Totals		210	100%

How many children under the age of 18 are currently living in your household?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	None	103	49%
	One	38	18%
	Two	48	23%
	Three	15	7%
	Four	3	1%
	Five	1	1%
	More than Five	1	1%
Totals		209	100%

Which of the following best describes your primary place of residence?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	I rent the apartment/co-op/condo where I live	35	17%
	I rent the house in which I live	21	10%
	I own the co-op/condominium where I live	6	3%
	I own the house in which I live	137	65%
	Other	11	5%
Totals		210	100%

What language is spoken most often in your household?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	English	203	95%
	Spanish	1	1%
	German	2	1%
	Norwegian	1	1%
	Other, Please Specify	7	3%
Totals		214	100%

Purchasing
Have you shopped online in the past 30 days?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Yes	194	92%
	No	16	8%
Totals		210	100%

How much did you personally spend on internet order items in the last 12 months?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Nothing	4	2%
	$1-$49	8	4%
	$50-$99	13	6%
	$100-$199	23	11%
	$200-$499	52	25%
	$500-$799	35	17%
	$800+	76	36%
Totals		211	100%

How often did you attend the movies in the last 90 days (3 months)?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Once a week or more	3	1%
	2-3 times a month	21	10%
	Once a month	50	24%
	Less than once a month	71	34%
	I did not attend the movies in the last 90 days	66	31%
Totals		211	100%

When did your household last purchase or lease a vehicle?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	In the past 12 months	57	27%
	1-2 years ago	52	25%
	3-4 years ago	54	26%
	5 or more years ago	35	17%
	My household does not own or lease a vehicle	11	5%
Totals		209	100%

How many credit/debit cards do you own?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	None	9	4%
	1	25	12%
	2	62	30%
	3	42	21%
	4	38	19%
	5	11	5%
	6 or more	17	8%
Totals		204	100%

How much did you spend for computer software for home use in the past 12 months?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Nothing	37	18%
	$1 - $99	49	24%
	$100 - $199	37	18%
	$200 - $299	38	19%
	$300 - $499	18	9%
	$500 or more	25	12%
Totals		204	100%

Careers
How large is the organization in which you work?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Less than 20 employees	28	18%
	20 to 99 employees	24	16%
	100 to 999 employees	40	26%
	1,000+ employees	60	39%
	I don't know	2	1%
Totals		154	100%

In which industry does your company primarily operate?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Arts/Entertainment/Recreation	6	4%
	Banking/Finance/Insurance	12	8%
	Business Services	4	3%
	Computer Hardware	4	3%
	Education	18	12%
	Government/Military/Defense	14	9%
	Internet	11	7%
	IT - Systems Integration	13	9%
	Manufacturing	8	5%
	Media	4	3%
	Medical/Healthcare	14	9%
	Professional, Scientific, & Technical Services	7	5%
	Real Estate	4	3%
	Retail/Distribution/Import/Export	3	2%
	Telecommunications	2	1%
	Other, Please Specify	29	19%
Totals		153	100%

What is your job title?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Chairman/CEO/COO/Partner/President/Owner/Principal	11	7%
	EVP/General Manager	1	1%
	Vice President	5	3%
	Director	8	5%
	Manager	38	25%
	Staff - non management employee	90	59%
Totals		153	100%

With which of the following job functions are you primarily involved?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Arts/Creative/Design	6	3%
	Business Development/Strategic Planning	7	4%
	Consulting	11	6%
	Customer Service	8	4%
	Education/Teaching	11	6%
	Engineering	1	1%
	Executive	4	2%
	Finance	7	4%
	Healthcare Provider	4	2%
	Human Resources	4	2%
	IT Services	27	15%
	Legal Services	2	1%
	Production/Operations	19	11%
	Research	5	3%
	Sales/Marketing	6	3%
	Software Development	2	1%
	Technology Support/Help Desk	6	3%
	Other, Please Specify	51	28%
Totals		181	100%

Listening Habits
Do you subscribe to the RSS feed for this show?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	Yes	188	83%
	No, I listen to or watch this show without subscribing	39	17%
Totals		227	100%

How many episodes of this online show have you listened to or watched?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	None (I just saw this link to the survey on the site)	1	0%
	2-3	1	0%
	4-5	3	1%
	6 or more	223	98%
Totals		228	100%

How often do you listen to or watch this show?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	I always listen to/watch each new episode	211	94%
	I sometimes listen to/watch each new episode	11	5%
	I rarely listen to/watch each new episode	2	1%
Totals		224	100%

About how much of each show episode do you generally listen to or watch?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	I always listen to/watch the entire episode	215	96%
	Usually at least 75%	10	4%
Totals		225	100%

On average, how many times do you listen to or watch each episode?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	One time	210	93%
	Two times	13	6%
	Three times	2	1%
Totals		225	100%

How do you most often listen to this podcast?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	On my computer	60	29%
	On my MP3, iPod or other portable player	141	68%
	On my cell phone	2	1%
	Other, Please Specify	3	2%
Totals		206	100%

How do you most often listen to or watch this podcast?
	Answer	Responses	Ratio
	On an iPod, MP3 player or other portable device with NO Internet capabilites	17	90%
	On an iPhone, PSP, cell phone, or other portable device with Internet capabilities while NOT connected to the Internet	1	5%
	Other, Please Specify	1	5%
Totals		19	100%

Satisfaction
Subject	Importance	Satisfaction	Gap
Audio Quality	8.22	9.53	-1.31
Video Quality	3.29	5.43	-2.14
Overall Quality	8.66	9.38	-0.72
Content	9.05	9.10	-0.05
Host(s)	9.32	9.52	-0.20
Reliability (new episodes available when promised)	7.77	9.04	-1.27
Length of episodes	7.07	8.82	-1.75
Frequency of new episodes	7.78	9.02	-1.24
Placement of ads or sponsorships in podcast	4.44	8.25	-3.81
Website design	5.40	7.86	-2.46
Website content	5.77	8.00	-2.23
Overall Satisfaction		9.31

Tags: Croncast Survey Kris Smith Betsy Smith Advertise Cronast Demographics

AdSense for Mobile but not for RSS?

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 12:37:36 -0600

There is no such thing as AdSense for RSS.

Google has run a closed beta for AdSense in feeds for nearly 3 years (that's like a billion internet years) and acquired a company that got feed advertising down to a science but there still is no AdSense for RSS.

So what gives? This a great opportunity to increase distribution of ad inventory and generate more revenue for publishers - the very people that make all Google services valuable.

My feathers are so ruffled on this because Google has figured out how to make AdSense for feeds work, for everyone. It's called AdSense for Mobile.

AdSense for Mobile has dumped the JavaScript copy and paste for server side execution in PHP, CGI/Perl, JSP and ASP. All four of these languages are magic bullets for putting AdSense in RSS feeds.

Why? There are a couple of reasons:

1. Most feeds are generated by blogging platforms that are built on these languages
2. JavaScript is needed to display AdSense ads and RSS feeds with JavaScript embedded in them aren't valid. Which means that most aggregators won't even allow you to add the feed. If they do it won't execute and will display the code inline.

So how do I know this this server side scripting will work?

I tried building an ad network with OpenAds for RSS feeds and very quickly came up against the JS issue for serving dynamic or keyword ads. I spent a couple of hours figuring a way to make it work, very similarly, with just PHP. So when I saw the mobile ads I thought "Bingo. This is it!"

Another reason that I know the mobile code would work for RSS is that by making a simple tweak to the mobile code that is supplied by AdSense I was able to serve the ads in my browser and output them as XHTML.

If a publisher took this modified code and put it in their feeds and made sure that it is placed in a CDATA section within a given name space like they could run AdSense ads. It's just that right now, the ads are formatted for mobile with phone numbers as links instead of urls and the publisher would probably get booted from the program.

Work with us feed freaks on this Google. It's time to stop policing the spigot, you've got the tech in place. Give us a taste.

Tags: AdSense RSS advertising mobile ads AdSense JavaScript

Season 19 Ep 11: Walzer A., Buffalo Days, The Coffee Drinker

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 10:51:22 -0600

Croncast - 2008-02-01.mp3
Show: #457
Length: 26:13
Size: 18.1mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

The Resale Queen Podcast is now here!
Every Saturday by 9 a.m. CST

About the Wednesday show
We were recording and the phone was ringing off the hook
Call from Walzer A
So this is Wednesday's show
Yeah, it was your sister calling
Brother-in-law lost his job
And the three mother hens showed up at his house
I did not envy him at all
It is getting more and more crowded in this boat
Your mom told you that you need to take care of this
I couldn't think of a more depressing situation
I wouldn't have come home
I would have went out at 8 am and got a beer
Where? This isn't Milwaukee
I would have waited that shit out
You are telling me that I am a born leader
I was telling myself that I glad you all weren't here
This is how it goes down in my dysfunctional family
My entire life I have had to be the man
What?
You shoveled in the middle in a snow storm
You can't even tell you shoveled
Doing it repeatedly doesn't make sense
At 4:30 am our neighbor fired up his snow blower
Ridiculous
Some men wake up with motivation, Kris
What would you do if it were a chainsaw?
Then he started cutting down trees
Well, hell he was motivated
Oh, baby
I tossed pup pup in a snowbank
What for?
To send to the TV station
Are you serious?
Well, I did send it
The auto response email was "Thanks for sending to KABC 7 Los Angeles"
Your snowy dog will be on in LA
You dogs suck
Jorge would be restricted to humane society
Ass end up in a garbage can
That is what we should have called the Resale Queen show
Yesterday, I almost slipped and died
Good things that dumpsters are heavy
How come they don't shovel by them?
I am going to open Dumpster Land
A theme park for you and your people
The dangers that you face everyday
It can't be packing peanuts
There is no Calvin pissing on nothing
What stickers would the truck have?
Did the new trucks ever roll out to La Moille?
I though i shouldn't ask because it would be sad
There was a time that they did come out
No one can tie a knot in this town
Ending up in the county jail
Swanson's baby
Onions in the peas
They came to town for Buffalo Days
The quaint small town festivals in movies, lies
There's no tax base to support that
Basketball game in a gravel pit
I grew up across from a buffalo pasture
Did you ride buffalo instead of ponies?
Did they chain them to a claw foot tub to slow them down?
From kindergarten to graduation at 14
Let me run the tilt-a-whirl
I would be right there
Ending up with a corn cob in his bibs
Might be dangerous but in a small town that's fun
Being pulled on sled behind cars
Watching the console in a lawn chair
I have sat in the back of a Chevy and bounced across fields
We didn't do donuts in a Wal Mart parking lot
It was a small town
Ok, K-Mart
That would have been a 30 mile commute
I know you rode in the back of a pickup truck on the way to a K-Mart
Yes, I did
CB radios in those days, figuring out who the coffee drinker was
Your mom would have a handle

View Kris's resume or download it

Tags: buffalo snowy dog LaMoille Resale Queen sledding

Betsy and her husband Kris Nov 19, 2007

Mon, 19 Nov 2007 09:46:14 -0600

Croncast - 2007-11-19.mp3
Show: #435
Length: 34:52
Size: 23.9mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Baby, I been 33 for a week and realized something
You are beautiful
You've go a style all your own
Did senility set in?
You've got the reverse mullet
I need to get this woman a PBR
You got the part up front and business in the back
A very serious paradigm shift
So sorry for you sucka
You gots to see the business coming
You have requested I sell everything I own
Mine, my stuff
I bring up your rings
What did you tell me, Betsy?
Yeah, whatever
You can get your second wife bigger rocks than these
Diamond guns
I'll have diamonds falling out of my shirt sleeves
And now after taxes we can live off of it for a month
Spending money breathing
Garrick said, "It's expensive to wake up in the morning."
Paying to get through the day
Gotta get paid while you sleep
People do buy it now while I am snoring away
We bought ourselves a little time
Thanks to Chris Brogan, Rob Shore, John C Havens and others for leads
Head over to Croncast.com and check my resume
Oh, what are you doing?
Big stress doesn't lend itself to thinking about the holidays
His TV is buying a doll and a fruit tray
I'm queen of the wives
Speaking of this
Evan and I got into trouble with this last week
"what do you wives do?"
We said "Naperville" the wives don't work
I could be making $10 slanging slurpees
And you would still be at home
We could get a Jaguar gift certificate
Maybe the Volvo should disappear?
I called ChildServ to see if I can get on schedule
Back to my story
I was Christmas shopping
I am not going buy anything Made in China
Especially not a doll
What?
Have you gone all blue collar?
They'll poison your toothpaste and feed you Aqua Dots
I don't get this
I buy retail once a year
It's ok if it is gifted to Goodwill and you get it?
Hell yes
Even American Girl Dolls are made in China
So I am working this doll tip
You can't find any dolls that are not made in China
Betsy is out to change the world
She has always been fascinated with China
Chinese history books are all over the house
I grill Betsy on it as she avoids
This isn't about improv
I think the Cultural Revolution were interesting
I am trying to make this easy for you to understand
Olympic questions next
It'll be fine as long as no one gets pregnant
Dexter on Showtime has been great this season
WGA strike
Screw the studios . . . these writers should get on with it online
Thanks to CaptRespect and MacGeek for support!!

Audience Survey, please fill this out for us
Look for the graphic on "Audience Survey" on the main page

Tags: made in china Naperville Goodwill CaptRespect MacGeek WGA strike

Betsy and her husband Kris Nov 14, 2007

Wed, 14 Nov 2007 08:12:05 -0600

Croncast - 2007-11-14.mp3
Show: #433
Length: 28:35
Size: 19.8mb
Format: mp3

Show us some love and leave us a review at iTunes

Post birthday wrap up
No I won't read it . . . it is inappropriate
What did you get me for my birthday?
Love
How do I put a photo of that up?
Just a white space
Your gift already expired
It was an interesting birthday
Was it like having a heel ground into your balls
To know that your plasma just bought tickets to a movie and chocolate cake
You came home with this cake
It had one 3 of the 33
I thought about using toothpaste to put the other on
I saw this monster chocolate cake
I have been shaving chocolate since 4 a.m.
Granted, he'll know it's from Costco
"All-American Chocolate Cake"
My Black Keys poster is gone
You blow out the candles
It was like a car tire, not really
My accent is like a cheesegrater on the edge of my words
I chop up the cake
Hand it out
And everyone is like this is a great cake
Elliot stands up straight
"I NEED TO BE EXCUSED"
He starts bouncing off the furniture
My mom look up and her face it bright red
Maggie starts freaking out too
She is yelling about wanting to ride the dog
Yeah, I ate four bites and had to stop
Betsy, I think it is full of caffeine
Loaded chocolate cake
Who wants to do more cake?
I am wired at this point
I didn't have an iris left
Just black eyes from open pupils
I couldn't handle it
You guys were right about the cake
Mom just stands up all the sudden
I gotta go to bed now
Talking a mile a minute
I go to get my phone out of the car
Find some gummy bears
I eat a handful of them
My chest starts thumping
My body tingles all over
Was it going along with the beat of the music?
I have never, ever felt that way in my life
Felt good when you scratched you head though didn't it
You know what will make you feel better?
More cake
That is like saying, I could use more diarrhea
I need to find my worst enemy to share it with
Scientists for chocolate experts look at that cake and tell us why
That cake was pure baked cocaine
I was still thinking about the cake today
Why do I want more cake? It's 8 a.m.
I do not fall into the stimulant category
Thanks to Costco I will no longer eat chocolate cake
You can turn off your emotions like a switch
Kris's phone is blowing up
Birthday wishes at 4 a.m.
I need to invent an apparatus that allows you to smoke while sleep
I'll be a quadrillionaire
Smoking in your sleep is healthy
Human mysters at 2 a.m.
The deer just stood in the front yard
Yeah, your dog will poop and eat it before it hits the ground
Stuffed animals from Goodwill need to be washed, Betsy
No they don't, they just need love

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Tags: Costco cake Goodwill smoking in your sleep caffeine chocolate expert

3 Years of Croncast - via flickr

Thu, 08 Nov 2007 12:23:15 -0600

Croncast has been a blast to produce.

Thanks to all the listeners past, present and future.

No clue who we are? Subscribe to the podcast or check out our site for more information.

Tags: croncast subscribe clue podcast site

Today: Three years of Croncast podcast

Thu, 08 Nov 2007 08:46:05 -0600

Uno, dos y tres!

We've been doing it up for three years as of today! A library of four hundred and thirty shows since November 8th, 2004.

What is there to say? More, obviously!

We want to say thanks to everyone who listens to the show and to those that have listened in the past. Thank you for allowing us, in absentia, to make you laugh.

Also, thank you for sharing the show with your family, friends and strangers by playing it for them, the blog posts, commenting on our site and the reviews that you have written.

Six months from now we should hit the 500 episode mark. Then it will be time to party!

Tags: Kris Smith Betsy Smith Croncast archive RSS podcast library

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 31, 2007

Wed, 31 Oct 2007 08:53:52 -0500

Croncast - 2007-10-31.mp3
Show: #427
Length: 31:53
Size: 21.9mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 31, 2007

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It's Halloween here in the states
Betsy points out my illness of the past few days
It feels like something is eating my guts
Pop upstairs and see Betsy is watching PBS HD
That's ok to watch tears on PBS in HD, at least she is watching HD
The grieving process and death
How much more depressing can it get?
Dead babies?
Betsy how can you feel good after that?
Let me transition Kris
This was a transition you just didn't let me get there
Gotta bring it back for the people
The email for it was vague
What are we exactly going for
Not you, not you, not you
It's at the Rosemont Theater
Right by airport with turbine exhaust blowing in our faces
Downwind of O'hare
I put up some of the photos
Those are like Twitter questions
What did you put?
Podcaster
And it filled the whole thing
The people, Bears, the people
None of them were excited to be there
What do you do?
Nothing
Who can't come up with something
Prepare!!!
Don't stand there it's not your mark
Turns out that at this, audition
There was no Pat or Vanna
Plumber pipe fitter
I like to do karaoke
That's perfect, queue the music, YMCA comes on
Merv says, 'no'
Energy drops right out of room
You gotta flow with it
I can see the pipe fitters doing the YMCA karaoke in towels at the lodge
Pipe fitters singing YMCA
I got nothing for it
If you get on stage you get a bobble head Pat or Vanna
That's another Croncast t-shirt
She's just a Wheel junkie
PBS nerds look just like me
No they thought I was the baseball player, Youka-something
They were like, "I didn't know you could hit with moobs"
I did a couple interviews with Tony Kahn and Gary Mott for Morning Stories
Hopefully it will get on
Thanks to Tony and Gary for hanging out and putting up with my podcasting talk
I'm feeling the venom here
Now I have nothing left on my life list but riding a llama
Llamenade serverd at 98.6 degrees

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Tags: Wheel of Fortune PBS WGBH Tony Kahn Gary Mott Morning Stories

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 24, 2007

Wed, 24 Oct 2007 08:33:26 -0500

Croncast - 2007-10-24.mp3
Show: #424
Length: 26:23
Size: 18.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Oct 24, 2007

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Here we come for Wednesday
You can check us out at C-R-O-N-C-A-S-T dot com
You are just being a sensitive nerd
Well, since I said I was leaving Room 214
Sure people can read between the lines
People do
Yeah, and that isn't a bad thing in this case
That's your life not mine Mr B
I don't care if you are not happy, because I am
I know your life plan isn't going all that well
Karma and me are on a date called my life plan
I wrote down my goals and passed them to the Secret
Some things . . . My religion is a mix of Universalist Unitarian and the Secret
I'm halfway through my list, step back
I called Empire Carpet
You did that already
That is what I am saying
Further down on my list
I have it on every life goal list
If I didn't know you I would think you live near an abandoned rock quarry in a trailer
Tell the people what it is
I want to be a contestant on The Wheel of Fortune
And they are coming to Chicago this weekend
Oh, baby
People, send me some good vibes!
It works for cocktail party small talk
I don't think so
They'll just remember you from the convenient store scratching tickets
The prizes are good today
In the past they weren't all that good
They ran out of ceramic dogs in 1986
Vanna has it going on
You have something for Vanna?
No
Either way that is disturbing
She looks like a Bratz Doll
Now you went and messed with Karma
You are blushing
Apologies to all who have email, commented
Things have been crazy here
Chicago has millions of people and more than one convention center
On my life list from last year I had wheel of fortune
You can't invite more people
What if they get on and you don't?
At least I will know someone who is on the Wheel
Congratulations to the Browns who welcomed their second child today
So what do you want for Christmas Kris?
iTunes is going to get Led Zeppelin
Pshhhhhhht, I can get you 35 CD's at Goodwill for $35 forget iTunes
The computer wants to capitalize the word internet
It was a special place in the sky like Itasca

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Tags: the Secret Led Zeppelin iTunes Wheel of Fortune Chicago Goodwill Bratz Dolls

Things do change

Fri, 12 Oct 2007 09:27:03 -0500

Inevitably, every time that I put show notes together the current day's show ends and iTunes flips randomly through previous episodes of Croncast. Always a good exercise in comparing the current show with one from the past. It's like podcast training . . . athletes do it.

After listening to any show from 2004-2006 I can't believe that was us. The shows are so much tighter now. I sound more relaxed.

I think it proves one thing . . . stick to something long enough and you are bound to get better at it. Thanks to all the listeners who've given us their time over the last nearly three years. Many better shows to come!

Tags: Croncast quality iTunes podcasting better sound

Betsy and her husband Kris Sep 12, 2007

Wed, 12 Sep 2007 08:43:37 -0500

Croncast - 2007-09-12.mp3
Show: #409
Length: 28:50
Size: 19.8mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Sep 12, 2007

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I burned the taste buds off my tongue
You can't tell people that, Kris!
There is no excuse
The TSA travel restrictions . . .
You need to buy travel size
I have to always go through with electronic gear
How do you know?
You ever travel with toothpaste
I buy it at the hotel
They only had toothpaste at the hotel
She taught me how to catch knives with my thumbs
Nerds get no respect . . . I can fuck with this guy
I have no need to respect this man
Laughing at me as I look like a fat penguin
Please go ahead of me, I will be here for a while
They always say something about the gear
Yes, you know what I won't even go into and save people time
Hey wait, aren't those condenser mics?
Why yes they are?
Did you say that you used to have a Neumann?
I did not
If you spent our last $7000 on implants . . . no I would not be pissed
I would wish you no ill will
He starts leaning over all suave
Slowly leaning
He goes,"I'm a producer"
I started laughing inside
Aren't we all kid
I felt like an old man
I bet you said it in your creepy voice man
No I didn't
I haven't busted out the creepy voice in a long time
You used to use the creepy all the time
Do the creepy voice
No
I don't know what to say
You think it is suave
It is not creepy
Say, "Ain't we all kid"
Somebody strip search that man
The voice isn't scary or creepy
I did up Boulder
Then came Philadelphia
Many observations from the city of brotherly love
They might have been your siblings, Betsy, not mine
At the first part we ended up at a house part
I didn't eat the beef jerky on the plane
I can follow your advice
Making other people's lives better one flight at a time
I am sure they don't even sell jerky in Boulder
All natural it would be
I go to the house party with Aaron Brazell and his wife Nicole
Imagine how pissed they would be to shake you down for no cash
They are used to living in the city
I am now soft and weak
That is so suburban
Yes, Bears you can't do that
I am an old man now, I can't pull this stuff off
On the porch is a hype causing nothing but trouble
They keeps it super real with gun inside the house
Now that is what I call a house party for a guy who never leaves his man pit
Hey, I'm at a party
Betsy starts making shit up
I hung up and was like
Kris is at work at a house party in the hood
The party was pretty good
Next day headed off to Podcamp Philly
The after party Saturday night . . . unisex, co-ed bathrooms . . . WTF
"It's trendy"
It is not trendy to have to dump out in front of the opposite sex
No one likes to do it
Betsy goes off about the cleaning people
Baby, no one . . . no one, likes to clean
You can't have male cleaners
Men can't clean
It is totally genetic
You can't keep anything clean baby
I know you will try but it is all full of junk
That's called inventory

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Tags: Philadelphia Swanky Bubbles Aaron Brazell Nicole Brazell Podcamp Philly 2007 cleaners

Making use of my Google Reader shared feed

Tue, 28 Aug 2007 15:37:04 -0500

The 'kris is reading' section of the site is now fully functional. Go and check it out. I'll be here when you get back.

Glad to have you back.

So what the hell was that, right?

I have finished up, for now (some touching up to do), what I think is a pretty cool way to use a shared Google Reader feed. I think I stumbled upon an interesting concept that enhances sharing information online and makes it more personable.

The history of how I got to this point is at the end of this post. I'm going to try to describe what you just saw the best way I can. Here goes nothing:

1. I parse my Google Reader shared feed and cache it in a database. This is done with a script that runs on a cron every two minutes to get new items - post title, description and timestamp
2. I stamp the item with the current time that I most likely read the item
3. This is cool - I run a script to generate keywords (subjects) from the shared item. The script needs to mature a bit but it is pretty effective.
4. I then pull the cached posts up in to the 'kris is reading' section of the site and order them by the time that I read them. Really the only way to organize them coherently since the post timestamps vary based on the author's time zone
5. I display the keywords below each post. Each keyword is a link that will search all of my other shared items for related posts. Each keyword has a link to technorati. Each keyword is an entry into RSS feed for that keyword subject.
6. I have added a 'Search my read items' function so that you can search my shared items for whatever you like. If you want to find items that I have read about about ceratin topic like, Facebook, you can.

What's happening is that I am giving you, the reader of my shared feed the ability to use me as a content filter. And the best part is that you didn't have to ask me to read up on a given topic that you are interested in. I didn't have to add it to a to-do list, I was already doing it. And now I'm able to give you access to it in a few ways:

1. Here's everything that I have read and shared from Google Reader
2. Here's everything that I have read - now search it by subject
3. Here's everything that I have read - now subscribe via RSS to a subject (keyword) and get updates every time I read an item about your subject without ever having to come back to my site

The other really cool part is that the source publishers benefit from my sharing adding the drill down with search, keywords and keyword feeds.

In this scenario I have become a 'social filter', so to speak. Then my readers get to step up to the plate and filter even further. A 'hyper-social filter', so to speak. I am able to share an item from a publisher that my current readers might have never found. Possibly (and possibly in the same sense that someone might find your content in search engine or directory) my readers will visit the publisher's site and subscribe to the source feed.

In a strange way it gives an individual like myself the chance to create a low threshold directory with the ability to be distributed simply by marking items that I like. It takes Google Reader to a new place beyond a feed reader and makes it a platform for syndication. Google Reader becomes a powerful tool to create new channels of distribution for content that usually meets its end on a subscribers computer. Now it has legs.

How can I see other people using this? Tons of ways.

1. The same way that I am using it to create a history of my own reading with the ability to share right down to the topic level.
2. By individuals respected as gate keepers like librarians. Example - whether the source feeds were running on their library content or the internet they could mark items from those feeds and then give the feed based on a topic to a patron, i.e. happy computer savvy student who doesn't need to come back and ask for help again.
3. Could be used to share information behind a firewall from corporate blogs. Great way to fatten up a corporate knowledge base by picking and choosing from your qualified authors.
4. You could create micro-repositories based on topics
5. A million other ways that I haven't thought of yet. Not even quite sure I could come up with a million.

How I got here:

A few months ago, before Rick split to California, the full Naperville nerd posse was together one last time. I was busting out a story about how I was parsing out my Google Reader shared feed and displaying it for site visitors on my 'kris is reading' page. I was way stoked about it. But like many times in the past, it came to light that Rick and beaten me to this with the 'links' section of his blog. He was taking his shared feed, burning it and displaying it on its own page and in his blog navigation. Brilliant!

My consolation, instead of being first (important in nerd circles), was that I had learned how to do this with my own code . . . a valuable prize I am finding out.

So about a month ago I changed up the code to cache my shared feed items. Which was good for two reasons:

1. I could display more than the 25 items in the feed
2. I would have a historical record of what I was reading in my own blog.

And, again, I was not first again. Damn it! This step was inspired by the Tumblr link blog of Josh Bancroft. Seeing the posts cached and the ability to navigate them 20 or so items at a time was brilliant. I could see a ton of stuff that Josh was reading but also see what was motivating him enough to write posts from.

Should I know better than to try be first in doing something? Yes, but my nerd side does get the best of me sometimes.

I doubt that I am first in working over a shared feed this way but it was fun to build and I am sure it will be useful in making something else. Hell, maybe it will inspire someone else to do something cool.

Tags: Google Reader shared feed kris is reading Josh Bancroft link blogs

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 01, 2007

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 10:42:30 -0500

Croncast - 2007-08-01.mp3
Show: #392
Length: 1:05:10
Size: 44.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Aug 01, 2007

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We've made it into the month of August
You've now crossed into Elk Mountain Resort and Valhalla Shooting Club
Sure you don't want to bitch about Boulder some more?
I like Boulder, there are just some things I don't
We roll up and there is a guard tower
Was he standing there with a rifle?
No, Mr B
It is a gorgeous view
Flanked by beauty
The guard comes ambling up to the Volvo
Your names ladies?
We give them, remember this
"Do you ladies have any firearms with you?"
No firearms in this Volvo
This wagon is clear
He gives us directions
We roll on up
Elk Mountain Resort is beautiful
The valet pulls it four feet away and parks
The woman on hotels.com just kept complaining about it
She is nuts
Jeannie says the place is like Annie
Everyone stands to greet you as you walk in
Then there was Santa Claus
A dude with a white beard and red suit?
No, he had a uniform and a "I love my job smile"
He's got hot towels on a silver platter
He looks at me and says, "Mrs. Smith would you like a towel?"
He looks at Jeannie, "Mrs. Smith would you like a towel?"
Shit, the deal is sealed, we are the dykes
Welcome to first class
It took us 9 hours from Boulder
We'll make everything guided for you
What time would you ladies like dinner?
This Mrs. Smith would like to eat before 7:30
Mrs. Smith and I would like to eat in 45 minutes
Santa has an ear piece and a chest mic
He talks into it and poof the bell hop appears
We get to our room and the view is gorgeous
If you don't like it dial "0"
The bed looks like a cloud from heaven
I got Wal-Mart sheets
Jeanie, "We have robes!"
Hers and hers robes would have been nice
So we get dressed for dinner
It was intimidating, we felt like we didn't fit
Then I bust out the gift certificate
We wanted to play it cool
Sure, you want to fit in
They were nicer than your grandma who hasn't see you in three years
Every time you walk in the door the staff stands
Oh, are you ladies here for dinner?
I'll announce you, then he speaks into his lapel, "The Smiths are here for dinner."
You haven't told them yet?
No I was waiting for Jeannie
Who's the man, the big footed one with a bad perm
Are there any other guests at the resort?
Two other men not talking
There were 10 total guests at the resort
We order our dinner and they ask for drinks
My mom always orders the house wine, the cheap stuff
I'll have a Mountain Dew won't go over well
Jeannie hates red wine but follows Betsy's lead
Hi, I'm Chef Jeff, which house wine is best for you?
They start bringing out bread baskets and baked stuff
Chef Jeff is like, "Fuck dude! I worked on that all day and you can't say it."
I look at Jeannie, I can tell she doesn't like it
Been there and done that
Jeannie is woofing it down
I have to eat at least half of it
The two men eating alone are now joined by someone I recognize
The owner that I had seen on The Daily Show
Kris if you kick it up a notch we can do this every weekend
He comes over to the table
Asks what activities we are going to do
ATV's and shooting
We are the only resort in the entire world to have access for ATV's
Jeannie, "I love the outdoors but I can't go up high"
Our ATV's are automatic
They've thought of everything
Yes, everything
On the ride you will come to a place called Top of the World
So high that airplanes will fly below
Then he launches in to the special lights
These are based on the biologic make up of a lobster's eye
They are used to melt the snow to make an ice tunnel
Mr. Foreman continues to talk about the press they have gotten
A book on the NYT Best Sellers list is based at Elk Mountain Resort
He had me sold . . . I wanted to kiss a bear and drive to the top of the world
Why would you think that you couldn't do something?
Tom Foreman makes you believe that you can do anything
Enter the rest of the guests
Three sets of couples that look like my neighbors
Fit soccer moms?
Yes, Kris
I just drove 4 states over to get away from them
Now they are going to spoil my mountain view
Mr. Foreman goes over to the new couples
The super sweet firebox
Then our food comes
Every time there was another opportunity to be put in our place
We were still really awkward
Betsy has a bowl of puss and I get a bowl of noodles
It was couscous Jeannie
Jeannie starts to panic, all I get are these noodles
Campbell's has everything including broth
Then they bring the broth
After that they bring out dinner
The whole thing was terrific
Except that we were both completely terrified
To get over the petrification of being treated so well and Elk Mountain Resort stay more nights
Kris you are the king of upgrade
So after dinner Santa jumps up
We get our bill after dinner
Betsy goes white
Shut up Jeannie, I'll tell you later
The one thing you can't return is food
What I was freaking out about was that our house wine turned out to be $18 a glass
From their perspective, the lesbians aren't satisfied
Chef Jeff asks if dinner was to their liking
Then Thomas comes over and asks
After that the waitress comes up
Sure, they are trained like the CIA to read unhappiness
What would you ladies like to do?
We would like a jacuzzi?
Our eyes meet and we realize . . . they aren't out to get us . . . they are out to spoil us
Drinking our sangria in the hot tub
The cheap wine was awesome
Betsy took 100 pics of the tops of trees
At the Boulder art fair there was a dude with aspen photos
So we retire to the room and Jeannie puts on a robe
Sliding into the bed of heaven
Mrs. Smith, this is going to be the greatest night of my life
The greatest part of this is that I have no kids to wake me up
Betsy wakes up at 6:01 for coffee and viewing birds that were probably released for my pleasure
Do you know how much this is costing per minute? Get up Jeannie
We decide to take a hike
We start to walk by workers that gardening
When they see you they stop, stand, smile and ask you if you need anything
Landscapers saw us, they froze like deer
When we went by them they commenced working again
Tom has thought of everything
When a crossed eyed man in golf cart tells you "good luck" heed his warning
People are freezing along the trail "I'm a tree. I'm a tree. I'm a tree"
Maybe the trail was made for someone who came one time
Betsy, they did not release cows into the national forest for you to view
Queue the cattle
Someone left it on the comment card no doubt
Gotta watch out for the feral cows
Jeannie was petrified of them
Now you know why he told you good luck
That guy used to not be cross eyed till a cow incident
We can hear them shrieking and yelling
There they are . . . the soccer moms on the zip line
Whew, my Nike sports bra is twisted
We are on our way back
Jeannie freezes as we stand on Have you told anyone that you are not Mrs. Smith?
I see two brown ears rising out of this draining ditch
Out jumps a giant mule deer
Betsy chases it to take it's photo
The lesbians are crazy!
What are the lesbians doing now?
Time for lunch on the patio
We need some cigarettes and an ashtray
"Can I have an ashtray?"
She speaks into her cleavage mic
Around the corner, "I'm on it"
I know it is fun to play spies but this is weird
It was awesome though, instant ashtray
Lesbians are on porch, queue deer
Queue the geese
Then the soccer moms come bouncing back fit and tan
"Where are you guys from?"
Bloomington. "We are going to drive through there."
Their husbands, reserved and uptight
Screw it, this is all about me
I am going to make the soccer moms laugh
She swore that she was thirsty and all the sudden water showed up
"Guess how many kids we have?"
I don't know this is a game?
We have 10 combined?
How many are girls?
One
Then they struck a bad ass soccer mom pose
They brought things like running shoes
Betsy brought Crocs and sandals
Perfect lesbian gear
The soccer moms told us that the ATV's were awesome
We get ready to go and Misha shows up
I have done this ride 500 times and not lost 1 person yet
She takes out these top gun flight suits
I brought you the biggest ones we have
Betsy, "Of course mine won't zip up"
Jeannie, "neither will mine"
Jeannie you rock!
This could be customer service boot camp
Their motto must be "we are not going to tell you no"
They actually import vans from Europe to fit through their gates
Probably because it is more aesthetically pleasing
This is my new motto, "It is all about me"
Betsy gives me the thumbs up and then hits a tree
So we're going up the mountain
Jeannie is flying behind Misha
Betsy is stuck
I look down and my left hand has the brake so tight that I won't move
When you got on the quad the Unitarian in you took over
It was trying to save you
Oh, I'm sorry when was the last time you drove an ATV up a mountain
Betsy is trying to avoid the sticks
"Mam, that is an all terrain vehicle. Run over the sticks."
Hitting trees really hurts
Right before we get to The Top of the World
I look up and it is all Aspens and cattle
Jeannie starts to freak
Get me past that cow so fast
I am getting away from that cow so fast
Kris, we got to the top of mountain
You can see Utah, three mountain ranges at 9000 ft
We both had brown mustaches
It added to the lesbianism
Every time Betsy talks to the staff it is about her husbands and kids
Talk into your chest, the lesbians are not lesbians
These people are awesome
Misha ran a camp for bad ass kids
Like outward bound? Way scarier
Working at Elk Mountain Resort is top of the food chain
You have got to put in your time
John of course is an ex-Navy Seal
He is bad ass
You feel amazingly comfortable and slightly scared
I love men like that. Don't you Jeannie
Sure, he was handsome too
OK, time for this podcast to end
We ended on the ATV's and it was time to drink
Don't hand the truck driver the bottle
Four or five inches of vodka
Kris, we almost drank an entire bottle of vodka
Jeannie is naked in a robe and slippers
We are ripped
You are so awesome . . . No, you are so awesome
I look at clock and it is 9:00 p.m. and we haven't eaten
We dial "0" and they tell us that the dining room is still open for us
We arrive and there are flames to the ceiling
Chef Jeff is making bananas foster
The soccer moms start to speak to us
Betsy with her vodka mouth
"Are we going to be on your webcast?", soccer moms
Jeannie loves it when I get out of control
"We should introduce ourselves"
No that is OK, I already have a name for you, "The bad ass soccer moms"
It could go either way
Then the leader dies laughing
Right, there has to be an Alpha mom in the group
Yes, the one with the longest Escalade, the EXT
So Chef Jeff comes over
Betsy, "A-1 Jeff we're trashed. Can I call you Chef Jeff from now on"
That's not chatting it up that is drunk babble
Chef Jeff really made it
We don't go to gourmet restaurants and have the chef talk to us for 40 minutes
It was entirely phenomenal
Kris, I know we have talked about how I challenged the Russian to a vodka drinking contest
Can I take it back when you order the most expensive item on the menu?
And I was on the urge of vomiting
Kobe beef times 2 with bananas foster
Betsy looks at me like you better eat that bitch
Chef Jeff is buying us drinks
And I have to deny him because now I can't see him
I don't know where I am at
We stumble back to our room
There is that point, where you realize that I am done my man
Jeannie deals with Betsy, I am sick
I will lay in the bed of heaven
Betsy has the her cigarettes and the camera around her neck
You ticked me off
You don't like me anymore?
I'll like you tomorrow
You just ripped my underwear and are out of control
I proceed to go to the most beautiful bathroom in the states
And I don't even have to use my muscles
I have an exorcism of the most expensive meal I have ever ate
More babbling from Betsy
Typical Betsy move, "I made myself throw up"
This is the best planned bathroom of all time
6 feet from toilet to wall on a slate floor
Betsy made a bed right there with a Turkish robe
And I fell asleep on that cold stone slate floor and it felt so good
As I was falling asleep I thought to myself . . .
I love John, Misha, Chef Jeff and I love Tom the most
Why? Because he was smart enough to put a twin bed in the water closet
I don't know what we were thinking by drinking so much
I have nicotine and alcohol poisoning . . . I need to dial "0"
We have to do another show for Valhalla
It was the most emotional day of Jeannie's life
Sorry about your underwear dude
I'll get you a Target gift certificate
These were Victoria Secret
Do you know how much stuff I will have to find and sell from Goodwill?
Final installment of Elk Mountain Resort and Valhalla comes your way tomorrow!

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Tags: kobe beef bananas foster Elk Mountain Resort Valhalla Shooting Club Chef Jeff bad ass soccer moms

Betsy and her husband Kris Jul 13, 2007

Fri, 13 Jul 2007 07:59:05 -0500

Croncast - 2007-07-13.mp3
Show: #386
Length: 20:54
Size: 14.3mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Jul 13, 2007

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For Friday, July 13th
Triscadecaphobe friends are feeling
Yeah, and I am taking my son to the dentist
Aren't I an evil bitch
We have Friday the 13th open, excellent
He hasn't been brushing much
Kris breaks down why the shows are so short right now
Kris is in Boulder till August
Yeah we're normal people
Are you trying to be at?
Looking around awkwardly pushing your tofu around your plate
Travel and seeing other peoples kids
I miss mine more when I see the other kids
And how my wife is pissed off
Getting up with the kids
Betsy coming out in a week
Kris going out to San Francisco
Back for when Betsy arrives
Yes, Kris you are abandoning your family
"I want daddy, he would have bought me the Transformer"
Jeanie and I are going to just stop and stay a hotel
Yeah, I can skip Valhalla for the peace and quiet
I have a little online issue
Kris you always laugh at me about my computer issue
The Nigerians are after Betsy
My spam is out of control
Sure, but you use hotmail
Did you reply to one at some point?
I do have a boyfriend over there
He's wealthy and a general
A storage shed full of machetes
Betsy is going to join the resistance, some faction
The faction that burns down all the internet cafes
The international campaign not to fund your country
You have to be creative when short on funds
I just want them to leave me the hell alone
Some sort of online condom
Back to Wednesday
I truly believe that this is your launching pad
I am banking on you
There is a long record of comedians who are excellent parents
It's crazy
If it happens Mr B it will happen
I will walk out on stage with pasties for you Mr B
You'll never get another audience
Live show
We're our own worst critics
Selling stuff on eBay that people feel cheated
It was her husband telling her that it isn't cool
People really think it used to be her stuff

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Tags: Valhalla Friday the 13th triscadecaphobia Transformers Nigerian internet cafes

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 18, 2007

Mon, 18 Jun 2007 08:09:14 -0500

Croncast - 2007-06-18.mp3
Show: #377
Length: 33:05
Size: 22.7mb
Format: mp3

Betsy and her husband Kris Jun 18, 2007

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After Friday's show you deserve this show. I haven't laughed this hard listening to one of our shows when doing up show notes ever.

Switched up the intro and Betsy gets lost
I finally get to tell my Entourage show intro beef because the fixed
What was the issue, flipped text
I don't think HBO gave the show a shot because the intro was jacked up
Bless you baby
Season 4 of Entourage they fixed the "Pizza" thing, sweet
Flight of the Conchords isn't on my watch list
Not a fan of the musical in any format
The Tudors dude is short and that ruined it for me
Tom Cruise wears flats, Tudors man should
Kris puts a ban nationwide on hummus
God damn, there is so much bad breath in this country because of it
The effort and strain that it takes to be married to Kris
It was like 105 degrees up there?
Did you put on some sunscreen?
No
That's not the point
Did you drink water?
That's not he point
Did you wear a hat?
That's not the point
Self-care skills are nil in your case, Mr. B
I understand that being healthy is important
The playset used to be log cabin
They can't destroy it because Abraham Lincoln might have slept in it
Yeah, the other daddies sleep with their lawnmower in their bedroom
He hasn't mowed his lawn longer than me
All I have to say is . . .
A big well of pity
Happy father's day Mr B.
That'll teach him . . . should have worn sunscreen
Look at the nice swing set with Abraham Lincoln wood
It is now a shiny beacon of play land for kids
Abe would be proud
I knew it would be done
The neighbors got the Rainbow Swing set
900 fat men could sit on it an not break it
I accidentally set myself up in a Betsy joke
So he says it to daddy and it's on
He should have been saying it to you
Man, Booba you are just full the Mr. B hate
You did a good job Mr B
I didn't know you knew how to use those tools
Back to the banning of hummus
Sweating out every last bit of water in body
Betsy hanging out breastfeeding and eating hummus
The interior of the house doesn't smell like dogs, cats or baby poop
It smells like Betsy's hummus death
It all came to me in a flash
I was embarrassed when your friends came over
Betsy's throat hummus fills the entire house
The real problem is that all the toothpaste in the world is poison
But, Jesus, the Tom's Natural Toothpaste is horrible
Elliot, "You can't eat the toothpaste. If you do it taste like you swallowed a plant."
Hippies shouldn't make anything that goes in your mouth
Neighbors cutting down trees again
We plant a tree, they cut down three
Now it is on our driveway as mulch
We debated for a long time, but the tree was going to fall down
Right, and your kids will die too
Was the tree sick?
The tree care guy said it had a patch of fungus that could grow
What sort of fear mongers must the tree care specialists be?
Trees will kill you in your sleep in the middle of the night
It is their favorite time to fall over and crush you
So what did I find in the river?
Here's crazy shit #997 that happens to me and Kris
I'll finish it on Wednesday's show

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Tags: Rainbow swingset Entourage Flight of the Conchords Abraham Lincoln cabin hummus death

Dave Slusher does me wrong - open reply

Fri, 08 Jun 2007 12:23:29 -0500

The following is a comment that I left for Dave Slusher regarding his podcast from yesterday lambasting me on "podcasting day job" from a presentation that I gave in 2006. It is waiting approval at his site, and in case it doesn't meet the specs I thought I would post it to the public here. To hear what I am writing about you can download it and listen to 20:40 - 24:50.

I usually don't respond to this type of stuff but this deserves another perspective . . . like one from me, the guy in question. Thanks to the friend that pointed this out. He also rips Scoble, so I am in good company.

My comment:

Okay, where do I begin. Dave, you and I are not strangers. We know each other from podcasting and have spoken on more than one occasion. We've both been at this podcast thing for a long time, you since Aug '04 and me since Nov '04, we've both got some perspective.

I respect your thoughts on my presentation, but I don't agree with you.

The presentation in question, "Leveraging your knowledge as a successful podcasting consultant" from PME 2006 was based on sharing my experience working for clients to produce podcasts from my basement. It was to help give a framework to those who wanted to make some extra bucks. Shit, I even give out my own business template for pricing and structure to those who attended and to those still asking for it.

Success, for me has been doing what I love, audio production, writing code and using my creativity in projects that pay me. Would you have me buy the argument that only "real" creativity comes from the absence of greenbacks?

In February of 2005 I opened my consulting company and two weeks later I had MTV as a client. Was it also bad that in my presentation I shared how I lost them as a client? Maybe the fact that I recommend to podcasters that they should talk to a business attorney and an IP attorney so that they can avoid pitfalls like libel or onerous contracts?

In my life, I too am trying to save for retirement, college for the kids and a safety net. If I can make a buck podcasting for other people . . . big or small to put toward them by making podcasting my day job it doesn't feel like I am punching the clock. It might mean that I am working "just another shit job" in my basement. However, it doesn't feel like a shit job. It feels like I am doing something that I love. That should account for something in the personal satisfaction category, I rank this job a 1.

You and I simply differ on how to make money podcasting. You like the advertising/sponsorship model and I prefer to both produce my own personal podcast and use my skills to make works for other people. My personal podcast has been delivered 3 times a week for 2 1/2 years with my wife every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Want to question my passion for podcasting?

On this, I'm not asking to debate this topic but simply recommending that if anyone is interested to hear the presentation in question head over to http://pa.gigavox.com/ and look for big goatee and bald head for the right session.

The bottom line for me is this is what someone who enjoyed both of our sessions had to say about them:

"Dave Slusher from Evil Genius Chronicles. When he speaks, Im there."

"Kris with Palegroove Studios gave the most honest, non sales pitch presentation on podcast consulting. He shared real world numbers, which is rare in this day and age."

Given our interactions in the past a comment about me like this shouldn't surprise me but as one podcaster to another, I'm sorry that you need to . . . wait, someone is asking for another mocha something, biab.

Back, I'll let the public decide if I am an evil prick trying to destroy "podcasting" by taking corporate money to work a shitty day job doing what I love from the comfort of my own home or if I got lucky and found a way for myself to make a living for family and our futures doing what I love from the comfort of my home . . . at my day job.

Tags: Dave Slusher Evil Genius Chronicles podcasting history ID3 Podcast Magazine day job

Jeff Probst interview, not mine, Tom Green's

Tue, 22 May 2007 09:23:14 -0500

I've been getting a lot of searches for "Jeff Probst interview" the past week since my post about the client work with did with Jeff and thought that some of you might be interested in downloading the hour and a half 455mb interview that he did with Tom Green last month.

I'm a fan of Tom Green and dig what he is doing with his show . . . hanging out, having some drinks, call-ins, skype-ins and big name guests in a lo-fi environment (it's Tom, the guest and the tech or two).

With that said, constructive criticism to follow, I'm not a fan of Tom's hired guns' web design, RSS prowess or the podcast consistency. I really like the show and want to see it meet some level of current web proficiency, also known as "nerds that get it".

Problem 1 is that the process of downloading a tom Green show is difficult. Problem 2, symptom of Problem 1, is that shows are streaming or progressive download (pseudo streaming) from the site. Problem 3 is that the RSS link for "Podcast" on the site goes directly to the Tom Green iTunes page . . . in iTunes and not the browser OR the real RSS feed.

Would it be too much to actually link to the RSS feed like this? I think not. My other issue with the RSS feed is that it only includes Apple RSS tags. Which means the display in other programs like FireAnt.tv is sans description or links back to the originating source, a.k.a www.tomgreen.com., where one might find more information about the episode.

Problem 4, the show looks good on Apple TV and the podcast releases are about as consistent as a Golden Girls' bowel movement. The live show is done week nights, when Tom isn't traveling around. The podcasted version takes days, sometimes weeks to show up in the feed. With the live version being semi-consistent the podcasted version should follow, just good form.

Tom, listen to me. Get nerds who can deliver your media and distribute it to the widest possible audience.

Tags: Tom Green podcast Jeff Probst tom green rss feed web proficiency pseudo streaming