show | Croncast - From Cool to Cul De Sac

Thank you for letting us entertain you!

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:38:57 -0500

Most of you knew that we were putting the brakes on this beast, but for those of you that didn't or are catching up . . . we hit our 500th episode and are putting Croncast to bed.

We've had a great time since November of 2004 putting out shows. The rewards from doing this show are too numerous to list but the few that stand out are meeting so many great listeners and fellow podcasters through the years. You guys have shared many insights with us and let us know that our experiences aren't so dissimilar from your own.

The best part is that we aren't done creating shows!

Starting on June 27th, 2008 we will still be cranking them out 3 times a week at Life in the Can, but with a special twist. We'll also be producing a weekly episode that is the best of all three shows from that week, with a special twist.

Yep, I wrote that twice.

The weekly episode will use the previous three episodes like they were brainstorming sessions and we'll pick the best bits and re-record them. We want to push ourselves in another direction and utilize the same skills that I have used for years producing audio for clients. It's time to try something new with our own show.

For the next few months you'll be able to get the new shows through the regular Croncast RSS feeds so that you won't have to resubscribe to the new show right away, though, I'd recommend it. You'll be able to decide which of the shows you'd like to receive.

One last thing, our entire Croncast archive will remain online for the foreseeable future so that anyone can enjoy the shows.

We hope that you'll join us over at Life in the Can in a couple weeks and get your laughing fix with Betsy and Mr. B.

Thanks to you for making this so much fun!

Tags: Croncast 500 shows Kris Smith Betsy Smith Life in the Can

Season 20 Ep 25: The Audition, What's Next, Life in the Can

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 13:03:55 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-18.mp3
Show: #500
Length: 29:13
Size: 20.1mb
Format: mp3

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Last time I have to listen to this!
You know you like my voice, Baby
I am surprised you are not crying
It's like a Hallmark Holiday
I just wanted to make sure we hit 500 shows
Back in the day with the old gear
Doesn't it seem like you are creating more work?
Not really
Transitioning into something new
The new show is "Life in the Can"
You can get the new shows at www.lifeinthecan.com
Three days a week still and a weekly best of the three shows
The first show will be released Thursday June 27th, 2008
We're excited about the new show
It would be rad if you and I could work together
Getting paid to do the shows would be great
I went to Jeanie's house last night
Cracking open the hand carved lesbian door
No crumpled up High Life cans
The Eden like backdrop
Deer walked right up
She had deer prints on her roof
Training ground Santa's deer
Getting them presents for the house
Populating her yard with beasts
Show up and build an Arc too
Betsy "Noah" Smith
I get wait to Zeus out there
You had a part of your E Hollywood True Story
The Improv dinner theater audition
I purposely didn't tell you this, Kris
What?
Where the auditions were being held
Ok
Where was it?
At Culver's
Oh, Baby
Did you get a milkshake afterward?
Your first audition was at a fast food restaurant
It proves you want it
It's embarrassing but it does prove you want it
I'm proud of you
Most people wouldn't have gone
What's more uncomfortable than going to open mic night?
Listening to open mic night stories
We have no context for this
How did it make you feel?
Maybe she is a biker
Going out on a high note
Thanks to everyone for throwing in their support for the show
In the effort to Keep the Archive Alive
That would be funny
No it's not
Thanks for listening to everyone
Whether it has been 500 or 12 shows, thank you
We've had a great time doing the show
The new show is, Life in the Can - www.lifeinthecan.com
You just can't end it Mr B! Can you!
Keeping you happy three days a week with a bonus
Thank you for letting us entertain you.

Tags: iPhone Life in the Can LitC High Life Hallmark Holliday

Season 20 Ep 24: Cousin Kris, Painters Cap, Nothing Is Level

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:28:11 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-16.mp3
Show: #499
Length: 22:52
Size: 15.7mb
Format: mp3

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Keep the Archive Alive goes on
$25 of support gets you 2 DVD's with the full archive mailed to your door
Drop that Archive Support at the site in any one of the banners
It is all about the Interwaves
The photo montage of the father's day trip are up
Look in the blog for the story
Soften up the crow's feet
Geez, that bag, what is she 33?
I don't know if Rock of Love is comparative to competitive improv dinner theater
The afternoon jamboree
Much like licking a toilet
"Cousin Kris!"
The first Casey's we stop at
Hey, I know you
No, I didn't know her name instantly
Hoping for it fire into my brain
Turns out to be cousin X
She's of the normal branch
But the odds of that
Not that great
Running into someone buying smokes
I just don't want to get there
I know, Betsy, you were driving 45 in a 75
Never thought we would make it
Creeping ever closer that sucking vortex where you grew up
It is an area of decay
Dilapidated nothingness
If you were a pizza deliver guy you would deliver to houses with siding
The rest are wrapped in Tyvek
It looks like depression
We tried the town route
Elliot is asking why it is abandoned
Yelling why doesn't it look like home
Two taglines
"For Rent"
"Rent to Own"
You wouldn't let me take the best photo
It was the award winning shot
It was beautiful
The transient neighbor
In a wife beater, smoking a cigarrete, talking on his phone in a NASCAR painters cap
And . . . And . . . his white wolf dog on the steps
Nothing is level there
I fell down 77 times
Growing oriental poppies
Couldn't believe it
Save me from this
And you walked away
Everyone walked away to leave me there
The scary compound
The old ass car wasn't as bad
Always had the perspective that there was someplace else I needed to be

Tags: white wolf chevrolet graveyard interwaves abandoned small town

hoop ballast

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 21:46:27 -0500

i told you folks the honest truth on the show that a bag of quickcrete, used tire, top 10 feet of a TV antanae and a Wal-Mart basketball hoop were my gravel driveway pride.

this remnant stands as a testament to this story. i had forgotten that we had written our names in it. check out that sweet "Kyle".

Tags: hoop remnant stands pride driveway

Season 20 Ep 23: Cotton Candy Salad, Keep the Archive Alive

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 12:19:01 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-13.mp3
Show: #498
Length: 25:41
Size: 17.6mb
Format: mp3

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Keep the Archive Alive Suport - Send your's today!
Thanks to Jen Stibi for Keeping the Archive Alive
We Jen upheaved and happy at work
Here's a podcast hug for you
You can't miss the banner
It's another Friday the 13th show
I wouldn't get out of this set of shows without it
Many, many things are going wrong today
How can you be freaked out about today?
Yesterday should have done it for you
Glad to be getting to the expert level
I didn't say it like that
Oh, really
Well, I don't know
Let me ask Betsy
That should be my motto
The common sense psychic
He told you it was Father's Day this weekend
Kris is happy in his squirrel nest downstairs
Keeping it as a secret
Having a surprise party
Betsy's Blue Mountain Alerts
I knew we were being invited to a jamboree
Waldorf salad vs. apple salad
Some might say they are the same
Like the hotel?
They wouldn't think hotel
I gotta be nice
You can do that, you know Improv
Not sure you can pull it off
Raised in a hamster cage
Not sure the kids can pull it off
Elliot might not be able to get passed grams smoking in the backyard
Don't get uppity, you're ignorant
It's pronounced "ig-nernt"
You shouldn't talk about that
What is your practice face?
You are a sad, sad human being
Making a new dessert - cotton candy salad
Did you try that new spicy chicken sandwich at Wednesday?
Diet and the correlation between behavior
Doctors can't fully help you
Why?
They have businesses to run
It is the truth
They are just people who need jobs
He'll eat it, it has apples in it

Tags: apple salad common sense cotton candy salad squirrel nest

Season 20 Ep 22: Sunny World, Community Improv, Archive Alive

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:52:05 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-11.mp3
Show: #497
Length: 29:51
Size: 20.5 mb
Format: mp3

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What was that?
Keep the Archive Alive?
Yes, it was
Support future listeners and the new show by sending support
How?
The banner above
Let's keep it trucking along by supporting the past
That is, the past, for the future

Tags: show name sad portraits grandma's glamour hard and shiny

Season 20 Ep 21: Foreclosure Goat, What's Next, Grass Roof

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 15:58:26 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-09.mp3
Show: #496
Length: 33:11
Size: 22.8 mb
Format: mp3

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Nothing on the show notes
Dispense a bit on the new format and show
Keep it real people
Enjoy that intro music!

Tags: apple iphone doberman foreclosure pets old intro grass roof

Season 20 Ep 20: Photos, Old Shuffling Posse, Professional Tic

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:25:15 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-06.mp3
Show: #495
Length: 30:25
Size: 20.9 mb
Format: mp3

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Oh, the 2008
Comments on the photos
I'm a what?
You're a good amateur photo taker, Bears
I never made it to the sweetest Goodwill in the world
When was that?
San Francisco, it just wasn't meant to be
Look at you all up on the Oprah stuff
I got my eye on those celebrities
I knew today was going to be a great day
Because the Lutherans were having a sale
Garage Sales are euphemisms for "Party on the Driveway"
You were benevolent enough to babysit
It is either a ghost or an alien in front of me
You should be so lucky
Space Ghost!
You can convince me of anything
I got to the sale kind of late
The guy from the furniture tent comes out an yells
That we can hop into a new line that is shorter
I was torn
They can have stuff in multiple questions
I think you will reach a point, your peak of sales skills
We should freeze dry you at that point
Then revive you in the future when the dollar is strong
It will be like a time machine
Betsy, you bring it
The dollar is still strong with the Lutherans
Double check the luggage later
I stand in line to wait for the dishes
I need my fine china fix in their housewares sections
I brought bags and I have adrenaline flowing in my limbs
Oh, look, Christopher Stewart
This is when I started to look like a nut
Started?
Slow shuffling old posse arrived
Those match my dishes
I love those
Are you going to buy those?
I am now just to spite you
You wasted my time with your story
They're rookies baby
You are con-garagies
They send the 12 year old anemic boy to help me carry stuff
She's now a professional tic
She went and bought speakers from Farm and Fleet
I love it, speakers from Farm and Fleet
I am sure you are related to people that duck taped their heads That is the truth
Duck taping down his pants
Especially when fired up the chainsaw
The tape suit
Class issues really stand in your way Mr. B
"Transvestite's getaway car ran over good Samaritan's foot"
Words make the world magnificent

Tags: Space Ghost Farm and Fleet speakers Lutheran sale Naperville

Season 20 Ep 19: San Francisco Part 2, The Meetup

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 14:25:08 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-04.mp3
Show: #494
Length: 41:59
Size: 28.8 mb
Format: mp3

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We're back for part two of San Francisco
The pre pre-school baby is in a kissing phase
She kissed a diseased baby
Then she kissed me and now I am infected
Other than daddy just do
I can blame it on her cuz I got the documentation
Her encrusted nostril in photos
I could track back the vector of my illness
Yes, you are the carriers
Listen to Croncast, "They argue with one another in their basement"
We rank with NPR shows in the post
How are we different than any other shows?
Funnier
Let the woman talk
No love for this man
I didn't get a party when I was there
Heading to the meetup at House of Shields
What if no one shows up?
People were bound to show up
Four people showed up
I am so glad that I disappointed you in a positive way
David, Sam, Russ and Katherine

The Meetup: Left to Right: Russ, Sam, Katherine (in back), David, Betsy (in blue), Jeanie

David has been listening for a long time
A very long time
He was in college, birthday, marriage to attorney
Look back at things that have happened while we have been doing the show
Schlomo gave us the space
It was dark, with a kicked over chair
That is HoS
Russ got a pre-smoking ban chair with an ashtray built into it
This is where we made the mistake
We started drinking right away, heavily
Jeanie kept up with me drink for drink
Mind you she is one third my size
We left the meetup to go dancing
More drinks
Then Jeanie starts dancing with a bearded Marylin Monroe
Having a great time and we stiffed them on the cab
Just drunk bitches we were
We gotta get to sleep
We have things to do the next day
We surface at 10 am
Jeanie didn't get out of bed till 3
I see a pattern with your Jeanie vacations
Remember Chef Jeff?
Back in my skinny days
Now I'm chubby
There's a food shortage I'm good for 8 weeks
At 8pm Mrs. and Mrs Smith are going to hop on a romantic cruise
They should have named it, "The Good Ship Jagermeister"
A little romantic music for you
If I tried to do that with my friends Evan or Mike
So the next day we rent a car
And we end up dumped in a pile of homeless people
They're like day of the dead zombies
Here comes the scariest wican beast i have ever seen in my life
This weather beaten hag pops up in the window
Shit happens, some people aren't what you expect
Are we on the road to Guerneville?
You can't do that with a kind vegan sister
A big coin receptacle
"I'm saving up to clone my cat, donations welcome"

Tags: San Francisco Guerneville Betsy Smith Jeanie Bowen meetup

mothering the big one no show today

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 18:26:39 -0500

my view from the couch today.

Betsy has been great today making sure that I had enough to drink today and making fun of me on every trip to the manpit.

Tags: making drink fun trip manpit

lying in bed staring at the fan

Sat, 31 May 2008 08:00:41 -0500

thinking about how busy we've been and how it is affecting the show in a negative way. hoping that we can get it together this week and get to the five hundreth and talk about what is next.

Tags: together hoping week hundreth talk

Season 20 Ep 18: You know, you don't have to call her your friend anymore.

Wed, 28 May 2008 12:43:20 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-28.mp3
Show: #493
Length: 28:21
Size: 19.5 mb
Format: mp3

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Good grief we are back
Thanks to Betsy for showing back up
You come back from San Francisco wearing my clothes
Up sidles a Wrangler wearing Milwaukee chick
She's checking me out
Of course she is
"So what are you doing in San Francisco?"
"I'm here with my friend."
"You don't have to call her your friend anymore."
The spandex blend is alive and well
You can look at Iowa from behind and know it's Iowa
The smell of Dubuque jumps off
The hills and the highway
I drive better than those taxi drivers
Don't look forward
You check carry on bags?
Yes, need to keep her creams and powders
The vacation schedule
The romantic cruise
We just wanted crab
The Russians followed me from Goodwill
Our waiter wanted to argue
Today, today it is my first day
Crab comes with nothing?
No one comes between Jeanie and her side salad
Dungeness crab is a mud spider
She called me a hot mess in Cantonese
We end up at a tea shop in China town
White hippie chick running it
In sweeps hippie number one
She's totally a trust fund baby
Character after character after character
You can make tea from anything
Why didn't you stop and ask a homeless person?
I didn't realize you were green with dots . . . what the hell do you have?
Mr B, this is my town though
I knew it once I stepped off the plane

Tags: San Francisco Tea House dungeness crab wrangler pants

Back for the Wednesday Show

Tue, 27 May 2008 08:13:23 -0500

We'll be back for tomorrow's show and the rest of the final 8 Croncasts in a row without interruption. Eight more, that's it! We've got some changes coming with the new show and are eager to get to.

So, now that Betsy's back after a week long west coast tour with Jeanie and her jet lag is wearing off, we'll be back on schedule with MWF till the well runs dry.

Tags: Betsy Smith Jeanie Bowen Croncast New Show

Spend Happy Hour with Mrs. and Mrs. Smith

Wed, 21 May 2008 16:03:54 -0500

That's right, you can have a drink or four with Mrs. and Mrs. Smith at House of Shields in San Francisco this evening at 6:30 pm. Many thanks to HOS proprietor, Schlomo, for having the ladies. Even if no one else but these two show up it is not going to end well.

House of Shields is located at 39 New Montgomery Street: see below.

View Larger Map

Tags: House of Shields San Francisco Schlomo Mrs. and Mrs. Smith

Season 20 Ep 17: The Mc Mansion Haul, Rottlador, Schnorgie

Mon, 19 May 2008 15:16:40 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-19.mp3
Show: #492
Length: 17.5
Size: 25:32 mb
Format: mp3

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Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Short show notes
Sorry for the no show on Friday
Betsy scores at a Mc Mansion
Well, I'm not sure the lamp above is a score, but . . .
Gucci the schnorgie (Schnauzer and Corgi cross)
Betsy and Jeanie in San Francisco starting tomorrow
Hang with them on Wednesday, see the link about for House of Shields get together

Tags: Mc Mansion schnorgie rottlador san francisco

Late Show Today

Fri, 16 May 2008 13:33:00 -0500

I'm sure many of you have figured this out but today's show is late. We'll get the show out later this evening so that you can have something to keep you occupied over the weekend.

Tags: Croncast iTunes review Kris Smith Betsy Smith