size | Croncast - From Cool to Cul De Sac

Season 20 Ep 25: The Audition, What's Next, Life in the Can

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 13:03:55 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-18.mp3
Show: #500
Length: 29:13
Size: 20.1mb
Format: mp3

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Last time I have to listen to this!
You know you like my voice, Baby
I am surprised you are not crying
It's like a Hallmark Holiday
I just wanted to make sure we hit 500 shows
Back in the day with the old gear
Doesn't it seem like you are creating more work?
Not really
Transitioning into something new
The new show is "Life in the Can"
You can get the new shows at www.lifeinthecan.com
Three days a week still and a weekly best of the three shows
The first show will be released Thursday June 27th, 2008
We're excited about the new show
It would be rad if you and I could work together
Getting paid to do the shows would be great
I went to Jeanie's house last night
Cracking open the hand carved lesbian door
No crumpled up High Life cans
The Eden like backdrop
Deer walked right up
She had deer prints on her roof
Training ground Santa's deer
Getting them presents for the house
Populating her yard with beasts
Show up and build an Arc too
Betsy "Noah" Smith
I get wait to Zeus out there
You had a part of your E Hollywood True Story
The Improv dinner theater audition
I purposely didn't tell you this, Kris
What?
Where the auditions were being held
Ok
Where was it?
At Culver's
Oh, Baby
Did you get a milkshake afterward?
Your first audition was at a fast food restaurant
It proves you want it
It's embarrassing but it does prove you want it
I'm proud of you
Most people wouldn't have gone
What's more uncomfortable than going to open mic night?
Listening to open mic night stories
We have no context for this
How did it make you feel?
Maybe she is a biker
Going out on a high note
Thanks to everyone for throwing in their support for the show
In the effort to Keep the Archive Alive
That would be funny
No it's not
Thanks for listening to everyone
Whether it has been 500 or 12 shows, thank you
We've had a great time doing the show
The new show is, Life in the Can - www.lifeinthecan.com
You just can't end it Mr B! Can you!
Keeping you happy three days a week with a bonus
Thank you for letting us entertain you.

Tags: iPhone Life in the Can LitC High Life Hallmark Holliday

Season 20 Ep 24: Cousin Kris, Painters Cap, Nothing Is Level

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:28:11 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-16.mp3
Show: #499
Length: 22:52
Size: 15.7mb
Format: mp3

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Keep the Archive Alive goes on
$25 of support gets you 2 DVD's with the full archive mailed to your door
Drop that Archive Support at the site in any one of the banners
It is all about the Interwaves
The photo montage of the father's day trip are up
Look in the blog for the story
Soften up the crow's feet
Geez, that bag, what is she 33?
I don't know if Rock of Love is comparative to competitive improv dinner theater
The afternoon jamboree
Much like licking a toilet
"Cousin Kris!"
The first Casey's we stop at
Hey, I know you
No, I didn't know her name instantly
Hoping for it fire into my brain
Turns out to be cousin X
She's of the normal branch
But the odds of that
Not that great
Running into someone buying smokes
I just don't want to get there
I know, Betsy, you were driving 45 in a 75
Never thought we would make it
Creeping ever closer that sucking vortex where you grew up
It is an area of decay
Dilapidated nothingness
If you were a pizza deliver guy you would deliver to houses with siding
The rest are wrapped in Tyvek
It looks like depression
We tried the town route
Elliot is asking why it is abandoned
Yelling why doesn't it look like home
Two taglines
"For Rent"
"Rent to Own"
You wouldn't let me take the best photo
It was the award winning shot
It was beautiful
The transient neighbor
In a wife beater, smoking a cigarrete, talking on his phone in a NASCAR painters cap
And . . . And . . . his white wolf dog on the steps
Nothing is level there
I fell down 77 times
Growing oriental poppies
Couldn't believe it
Save me from this
And you walked away
Everyone walked away to leave me there
The scary compound
The old ass car wasn't as bad
Always had the perspective that there was someplace else I needed to be

Tags: white wolf chevrolet graveyard interwaves abandoned small town

Season 20 Ep 23: Cotton Candy Salad, Keep the Archive Alive

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 12:19:01 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-13.mp3
Show: #498
Length: 25:41
Size: 17.6mb
Format: mp3

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Keep the Archive Alive Suport - Send your's today!
Thanks to Jen Stibi for Keeping the Archive Alive
We Jen upheaved and happy at work
Here's a podcast hug for you
You can't miss the banner
It's another Friday the 13th show
I wouldn't get out of this set of shows without it
Many, many things are going wrong today
How can you be freaked out about today?
Yesterday should have done it for you
Glad to be getting to the expert level
I didn't say it like that
Oh, really
Well, I don't know
Let me ask Betsy
That should be my motto
The common sense psychic
He told you it was Father's Day this weekend
Kris is happy in his squirrel nest downstairs
Keeping it as a secret
Having a surprise party
Betsy's Blue Mountain Alerts
I knew we were being invited to a jamboree
Waldorf salad vs. apple salad
Some might say they are the same
Like the hotel?
They wouldn't think hotel
I gotta be nice
You can do that, you know Improv
Not sure you can pull it off
Raised in a hamster cage
Not sure the kids can pull it off
Elliot might not be able to get passed grams smoking in the backyard
Don't get uppity, you're ignorant
It's pronounced "ig-nernt"
You shouldn't talk about that
What is your practice face?
You are a sad, sad human being
Making a new dessert - cotton candy salad
Did you try that new spicy chicken sandwich at Wednesday?
Diet and the correlation between behavior
Doctors can't fully help you
Why?
They have businesses to run
It is the truth
They are just people who need jobs
He'll eat it, it has apples in it

Tags: apple salad common sense cotton candy salad squirrel nest

Season 20 Ep 22: Sunny World, Community Improv, Archive Alive

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:52:05 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-11.mp3
Show: #497
Length: 29:51
Size: 20.5 mb
Format: mp3

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What was that?
Keep the Archive Alive?
Yes, it was
Support future listeners and the new show by sending support
How?
The banner above
Let's keep it trucking along by supporting the past
That is, the past, for the future

Tags: show name sad portraits grandma's glamour hard and shiny

Season 20 Ep 21: Foreclosure Goat, What's Next, Grass Roof

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 15:58:26 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-09.mp3
Show: #496
Length: 33:11
Size: 22.8 mb
Format: mp3

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Nothing on the show notes
Dispense a bit on the new format and show
Keep it real people
Enjoy that intro music!

Tags: apple iphone doberman foreclosure pets old intro grass roof

Season 20 Ep 20: Photos, Old Shuffling Posse, Professional Tic

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:25:15 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-06.mp3
Show: #495
Length: 30:25
Size: 20.9 mb
Format: mp3

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Oh, the 2008
Comments on the photos
I'm a what?
You're a good amateur photo taker, Bears
I never made it to the sweetest Goodwill in the world
When was that?
San Francisco, it just wasn't meant to be
Look at you all up on the Oprah stuff
I got my eye on those celebrities
I knew today was going to be a great day
Because the Lutherans were having a sale
Garage Sales are euphemisms for "Party on the Driveway"
You were benevolent enough to babysit
It is either a ghost or an alien in front of me
You should be so lucky
Space Ghost!
You can convince me of anything
I got to the sale kind of late
The guy from the furniture tent comes out an yells
That we can hop into a new line that is shorter
I was torn
They can have stuff in multiple questions
I think you will reach a point, your peak of sales skills
We should freeze dry you at that point
Then revive you in the future when the dollar is strong
It will be like a time machine
Betsy, you bring it
The dollar is still strong with the Lutherans
Double check the luggage later
I stand in line to wait for the dishes
I need my fine china fix in their housewares sections
I brought bags and I have adrenaline flowing in my limbs
Oh, look, Christopher Stewart
This is when I started to look like a nut
Started?
Slow shuffling old posse arrived
Those match my dishes
I love those
Are you going to buy those?
I am now just to spite you
You wasted my time with your story
They're rookies baby
You are con-garagies
They send the 12 year old anemic boy to help me carry stuff
She's now a professional tic
She went and bought speakers from Farm and Fleet
I love it, speakers from Farm and Fleet
I am sure you are related to people that duck taped their heads That is the truth
Duck taping down his pants
Especially when fired up the chainsaw
The tape suit
Class issues really stand in your way Mr. B
"Transvestite's getaway car ran over good Samaritan's foot"
Words make the world magnificent

Tags: Space Ghost Farm and Fleet speakers Lutheran sale Naperville

Season 20 Ep 19: San Francisco Part 2, The Meetup

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 14:25:08 -0500

Croncast - 2008-06-04.mp3
Show: #494
Length: 41:59
Size: 28.8 mb
Format: mp3

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We're back for part two of San Francisco
The pre pre-school baby is in a kissing phase
She kissed a diseased baby
Then she kissed me and now I am infected
Other than daddy just do
I can blame it on her cuz I got the documentation
Her encrusted nostril in photos
I could track back the vector of my illness
Yes, you are the carriers
Listen to Croncast, "They argue with one another in their basement"
We rank with NPR shows in the post
How are we different than any other shows?
Funnier
Let the woman talk
No love for this man
I didn't get a party when I was there
Heading to the meetup at House of Shields
What if no one shows up?
People were bound to show up
Four people showed up
I am so glad that I disappointed you in a positive way
David, Sam, Russ and Katherine

The Meetup: Left to Right: Russ, Sam, Katherine (in back), David, Betsy (in blue), Jeanie

David has been listening for a long time
A very long time
He was in college, birthday, marriage to attorney
Look back at things that have happened while we have been doing the show
Schlomo gave us the space
It was dark, with a kicked over chair
That is HoS
Russ got a pre-smoking ban chair with an ashtray built into it
This is where we made the mistake
We started drinking right away, heavily
Jeanie kept up with me drink for drink
Mind you she is one third my size
We left the meetup to go dancing
More drinks
Then Jeanie starts dancing with a bearded Marylin Monroe
Having a great time and we stiffed them on the cab
Just drunk bitches we were
We gotta get to sleep
We have things to do the next day
We surface at 10 am
Jeanie didn't get out of bed till 3
I see a pattern with your Jeanie vacations
Remember Chef Jeff?
Back in my skinny days
Now I'm chubby
There's a food shortage I'm good for 8 weeks
At 8pm Mrs. and Mrs Smith are going to hop on a romantic cruise
They should have named it, "The Good Ship Jagermeister"
A little romantic music for you
If I tried to do that with my friends Evan or Mike
So the next day we rent a car
And we end up dumped in a pile of homeless people
They're like day of the dead zombies
Here comes the scariest wican beast i have ever seen in my life
This weather beaten hag pops up in the window
Shit happens, some people aren't what you expect
Are we on the road to Guerneville?
You can't do that with a kind vegan sister
A big coin receptacle
"I'm saving up to clone my cat, donations welcome"

Tags: San Francisco Guerneville Betsy Smith Jeanie Bowen meetup

Season 20 Ep 18: You know, you don't have to call her your friend anymore.

Wed, 28 May 2008 12:43:20 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-28.mp3
Show: #493
Length: 28:21
Size: 19.5 mb
Format: mp3

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Good grief we are back
Thanks to Betsy for showing back up
You come back from San Francisco wearing my clothes
Up sidles a Wrangler wearing Milwaukee chick
She's checking me out
Of course she is
"So what are you doing in San Francisco?"
"I'm here with my friend."
"You don't have to call her your friend anymore."
The spandex blend is alive and well
You can look at Iowa from behind and know it's Iowa
The smell of Dubuque jumps off
The hills and the highway
I drive better than those taxi drivers
Don't look forward
You check carry on bags?
Yes, need to keep her creams and powders
The vacation schedule
The romantic cruise
We just wanted crab
The Russians followed me from Goodwill
Our waiter wanted to argue
Today, today it is my first day
Crab comes with nothing?
No one comes between Jeanie and her side salad
Dungeness crab is a mud spider
She called me a hot mess in Cantonese
We end up at a tea shop in China town
White hippie chick running it
In sweeps hippie number one
She's totally a trust fund baby
Character after character after character
You can make tea from anything
Why didn't you stop and ask a homeless person?
I didn't realize you were green with dots . . . what the hell do you have?
Mr B, this is my town though
I knew it once I stepped off the plane

Tags: San Francisco Tea House dungeness crab wrangler pants

Season 20 Ep 17: The Mc Mansion Haul, Rottlador, Schnorgie

Mon, 19 May 2008 15:16:40 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-19.mp3
Show: #492
Length: 17.5
Size: 25:32 mb
Format: mp3

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Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Short show notes
Sorry for the no show on Friday
Betsy scores at a Mc Mansion
Well, I'm not sure the lamp above is a score, but . . .
Gucci the schnorgie (Schnauzer and Corgi cross)
Betsy and Jeanie in San Francisco starting tomorrow
Hang with them on Wednesday, see the link about for House of Shields get together

Tags: Mc Mansion schnorgie rottlador san francisco

Season 20 Ep 16: Sellers Hate Hoarders, not the Game, Golf Stance

Wed, 14 May 2008 07:20:58 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-14.mp3
Show: #491
Length: 19.7
Size: 28:40 mb
Format: mp3

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Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Betsy "Classified Ads" Smith
That is your new name
You're like silly putty
Let me see your palm
I guarantee that their is an ad transfered to it
Did I see a Happy Mother's Day Classified ad?
Nope
Did I sleep on a floor for you?
Mr B I am going to kick your ass
I don't want to hit golf balls
Then I win by default
You are very competitive
My brilliant delightful wife made it rain golf balls
I thought it would be like a coffee machine
I wanted a cute paper basket with a handle
The second of the idiots is now here
They should put up a sign
There was a sign I am sure
Based on how you played it should be bright pink
You are so full of crap
I couldn't put my arms around you
Resting in your schwetty palms
A boy at the disco
You missed the ball completely
Then I got it dialed in
I was the winner no doubt
The driving range isn't on my to do list
If you had one we would have been doing the next
I am a bald man, I don't need to be sleeping on carpet
The divets on my head were too much
I won't make you sleep on the floor
Call you Betsy "Lemon Juice" Smith
This is my super bowl weekend
Where is the sale this weekend?
Bears, 23 consorted sub divisions all at once
They have a consortium of sub divisions?
Yes
Betsy now reads the classifieds
Leaving your boxes on the driveway
Somebody is going to steal them
UPS picked them up
Are you sure?
What are the rules?
You show up first and the item is your's
They might share a bag Gardetto's
You have done this to her
Bird Lady I am going to get you
I am going to walk around with

Tags: silly putty classified ads sub division consortium

Season 20 Ep 15: Dumpster Golf, Penny Drop, Fancy Hood

Mon, 12 May 2008 13:54:32 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-12.mp3
Show: #490
Length: 19.6
Size: 28:32 mb
Format: mp3

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Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Betsy likes the amens to her sermons
Now they can tell me to mow my lawn
We are way more boring than the show
The picture in her head of you was repulsive
Good thing she didn't see a real picture
I despise this time of year the most
Why?
The grass grows
I hate the mowing
Pulling back that shade for bits of sunlights
I am the Boo Radley of the neighborhood
I have been honing my skills without you
Something new to the Resale Queen toolbox
Not the Billy Squire stroke
A body bag full of bubble wrap
A body bag?
I tried to do a Penny Drop
That was for those of you that too kindergarten gymnastics
Tetanus shot for junking license
I had to have the bubble wrap
So I went to Goodwill
Fast like a bunny
I bought a Titleist
Golf club
We playing gold today mommy?
Yes, Maggie, dumpster golf
Your Titleist for dumpster diving
Your like a gorilla in the mist
Your people were the strain that hung on the jungle floor
Mine were smarter and more motivated
Now, I bring home the bananas
It's all about who brings home the bacon
I am forever grateful that you make enough for me to dig in a dumpster
We found your wife, sir.
Behind what store?
It could be worse, I could be a scrap booker
It is a services
I'm not going to mess with these women
They are serious
Treating things better
Betsy flattens a tire on my car
I'm driving slow on your rim
You were right next to the car dealership
Why didn't you just go there?
You used to recruit truck drivers, you talk to him
Sorry to be so vaginal
I just gave up
Why is he trying to change the tire?
Does he know how to change a tire?
Yeah, that's a lot of money for a fancy hood
They say that to a lot of women who get labia surgery too

Tags: Titleist gold club the bacon penny drop gymnastics

Season 20 Ep 14: Hoe To The Head, Classmates, Comments

Fri, 09 May 2008 12:15:46 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-09.mp3
Show: #489
Length: 20.5
Size: 29:52 mb
Format: mp3

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Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Gotta rock it out people, sorry again for short show notes
Thanks for the comments of late
They do mean a lot to me
Elliot taking one on the head
Life coming back
Former classmates
Spoiled doesn't mean success in life

Tags: gardening classmates landing strip emergency room staples

Season 20 Ep 13: Episode 13? No wonder.

Wed, 07 May 2008 16:35:26 -0500

Croncast - 2008-05-07.mp3
Show: #488
Length: 10:45
Size: 7.41 mb
Format: mp3

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Special note: Betsy and Jeanie are having a meetup in San Francisco May 21, 2008 at House of Shields 39 New Montgomery St., Time: 6:30 p.m., stop and have a drink or two!

Short short show
Not much else to say.
Some laughs await but we return you to your regularly scheduled life sooner than normal.

Tags: iPhone croncast late show betsy hut